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When it's not extreme? Some guys seem to think that possessiveness is bad but these are usually wishy washy types. I say if it's not extreme it is a trait that shows a couple really cares about each other and is being protective. What is your take?
Last edited by cra2ybeautiful; 03-24-2013 at 02:06 PM..
'Having or manifesting a desire to control or dominate another, especially in order to limit that person's relationships with others'
How can this ever be a good thing? I don't see anything protective about it. Possessiveness is purely about control. Freedom and trust are integral to a good relationship and possessiveness is the antithesis of this.
When it's not extreme? Some guys seem to think that possessiveness is bad but these are usually wishy washy types. I say if it's not extreme it is a trait that shows a couple really cares about each other and is being protective. What is your take?
hmmmm.....possessiveness is pretty much always a bad thing.
Oh, that reminds me. On okcupid they have an algorithim that requires you to answer all sorts of questions. One of these questions is "Is jealousy good or bad for a relationship?" Naturally, being a fairly rational person, I put bad. But it was really surprising the sheer number of women who answered "yes." Apparently this is some anachronistic holdover from when the route to a new girlfriend involved killing her old boyfriend.
Oh for the love of god, possessiveness is not protectiveness. It's pee-and-mark-your-territory behavior and childish in the extreme. Possessiveness is the mark of a weakling.
Protectiveness... My exes have all been protective - meaning they had my back in all situations and were concerned about my safety and welfare. If another man looked at me or flirted with me, well, why wouldn't he, in their opinion. My time has always been my own, and they have not sought to undermine or prevent me from maintaining personal relationships with friends or family. But they also would have described me as protective as well (more emotionally, than physically).
Possessiveness is my friend's boyfriend resenting her going out with her girlfriends every once in a while, and accusing her of cheating because she wore a v-necked shirt. Protectiveness is my giant biker ex staring down the guy who checked me out at the flea market one day, while sporting a prominent tattoo on his forearm of a bound woman suspended from a hook.
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If I was dating, I'd pass on it......
