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A few months ago I met this man online. It wasn’t through a dating site but a forum very similar to this one. It wasn’t unusual for guys to add me to messenger to try and talk me up. So when he requested that we talk privately I did so under the impression that I would be ignoring him once he tried to get me to cyber with him or something like so many of them did. I was surprised that he was not like that at all and generally wanted to get to know me and talk to me. Several times we would spend all afternoon online just talking to each other. And this went on for months.
The think is at this point I’m ready to move onto another level with him. But I’m not really clear how he feels and I don’t want to rush things. As a throwaway I gave him my telephone number and told him to contact me if he wanted to while I was away for a long weekend. He never did but then he never stopped talking to me online either. I never brought it up cause I just assumed he wasn’t all that interested.
In late November he mentioned that he wanted to go on vacation that he would need one soon and even entertained the idea of coming to see me. I kind of brushed it off cause I wasn’t sure that I wanted that yet. I told him that I would have loved to but really that I didn’t have time for him to and that I didn’t want him just being bored in my city while I was working all day long, even though there is plenty to do. And I didn’t want him to spend the money (he’s in NJ and I’m in KY). He always says he wishes there wasn’t the distance between us.
So out of the blue I send him an email in early December and tell him how I feel. How much that I like him that I didn’t expect to fall so hard and that it’s scary cause I had never felt like that for someone I had never met. I didn’t get a response. In fact all through December he just disappeared. I was starting to worry about what had happened to him and I wouldn’t get him off my mind it was driving me insane. So right after Christmas he send me a message when I was at work telling me that he was on vacation and that he missed me and could not stop thinking about me and that was it. I was a little irked that he didn’t bother to tell me and that I had been worrying so much. A few days after new years he sent me another message that he had finally read my email and he completely felt the same way about me. I was overjoyed and told him this when we finally spoke again. He apologized for making me worry and said that he had really missed me.
So we’ve been talking back and forth nearly every night since then and its great, I love it. Makes my nights better and something I look forward to. So last night I asked him if he would like to meet me and he said yes, he’d love to. I was kind of probing him but he didn’t respond to it. He never called me, he left without a word for nearly a month. All in all despite what he says about wanting to be with me and complaining about the distance between us I’m not sure if he really would want to.
I have really put a lot of myself into this, more than I should have with someone so far away. And I could not have found a better guy he’s smart, has his own contracting business, owns his own house, he’s completely stable and only at 26. I’m still in school 21 working part time trying to support myself and I just think what the hell does he want with me. I’m scared of getting hurt over this really. I don’t know how to move forward. Should I try giving him my number again? Actually ask if I can come visit him? Or just play it by ear and let it unfold. I’m kind of sick of waiting. I’m really impulsive and I want to just make the move if he won’t. But again I don’t want to push him away by moving too fast. Not really sure where his feelings are other than him really liking me. Not sure if he wants more or if I just fill a void for when he’s bored at night before bed.
Sorry it’s so long but I’ve never don’t the online thing and certainly not long distance. Not really sure where I need to go from here.
I don't like these disappearances. Are you sure he's not married or otherwise unavailable? Many people just kill time online or get cheap thrills out of such communications.
Good grief. Drop this thing and go meet a nice guy in the real world. Nothing you know may even be true about this man, and he is disappearing for a reason. Log off and don't look back.
I really don't think he is married. He is Greek and went to Greece for the holidays. And honestly he had no obligation to tell me as he's not my boyfriend. During our time talking he has been on dates and I have as well. I enjoy talking to him a lot and I really don't want to lose that. I suppose I can ask him to call me and gauge his response then. If he's weary then perhaps he is hiding something and I should end it.
Good grief. Drop this thing and go meet a nice guy in the real world. Nothing you know may even be true about this man, and he is disappearing for a reason. Log off and don't look back.
It's very hard for me to go out and meet people. I go to school full time and work 30+ hours a week. I have 3 hours of free time a night on weekdays and catch up on my homework on the weekends. I try to get out as much as I can but i don't catch a guy every time i go out.
It's very hard for me to go out and meet people. I go to school full time and work 30+ hours a week. I have 3 hours of free time a night on weekdays and catch up on my homework on the weekends. I try to get out as much as I can but i don't catch a guy every time i go out.
No one does. Stop thinking there is something wrong with this, and come back down to Planet Earth.
I really don't think he is married. He is Greek and went to Greece for the holidays. And honestly he had no obligation to tell me as he's not my boyfriend. During our time talking he has been on dates and I have as well. I enjoy talking to him a lot and I really don't want to lose that. I suppose I can ask him to call me and gauge his response then. If he's weary then perhaps he is hiding something and I should end it.
You mean you have never actually spoken to the guy? And you are wondering about him...WHY? I strongly suggest you lose his contact info and forget this nonsense. You don't have a clue what he is about (you can't possibly) and you live too far away to ever really know for sure. Move ON.
Oh, Lord! Do you and I share a disease or did it just happen by chance?
I think I need an elaboration on this
Quote:
Originally Posted by Onglet39
No one does. Stop thinking there is something wrong with this, and come back down to Planet Earth.
I never said anything was wrong with it.
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Do you and I share a disease or did it just happen by chance?
And you are wondering about him...WHY? I strongly suggest you lose his contact info and forget this nonsense. You don't have a clue what he is about (you can't possibly) and you live too far away to ever really know for sure. Move ON.
