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Old 08-04-2009, 08:15 AM
 
Location: Texas
44,259 posts, read 64,457,559 times
Reputation: 73937

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It makes sense, right? If you're not getting sex from your partner, you should be able to get it somewhere else. But that's not how life works. Sounds like a long, honest conversation is in order...or therapy.
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Old 08-04-2009, 08:16 AM
Status: "122 N/A" (set 1 day ago)
 
12,969 posts, read 13,707,820 times
Reputation: 9698
Quote:
Originally Posted by dragonfly0428 View Post
You know, I like what someone said about marriage/relationships being a contract. You sign a contract with a record label to promote your music, and don't go to another label if you are under contract. Same goes if you are under contract for employment - you can't take your knowledge or labor and just up and work for someone else while you are still under contract. If you do, in ANY case, you pay severe and sometimes irreparable penalties. Doesn't matter if you are happy with your record label or your employer contract - you signed it, you live with it until it expires or both parties agree to dissolve the contract.

How difficult is that to understand?
Ever heard of "Breach of Contract" I think it is reasonable for a married person to assume that sex will be part of their relationship and they won't have to beg for it. Under the law the "non breaching" Party is relieved of their duties under the contract.

Last edited by thriftylefty; 08-04-2009 at 08:38 AM..
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Old 08-04-2009, 11:35 AM
 
Location: Rockland County New York
2,984 posts, read 5,863,012 times
Reputation: 1298
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
You post with a completely cavalier attitude regarding your marriage. I don't see how you could expect any other type of response. You've not been laid in a year? TOUGH. Suck it up, talk to the hubby, or get the f*** out.

And, oh yeah...a YEAR? Pulleez. I know women than have done that times 12. Stop being such a wimp and start acting like an adult.
12 times a year? I feel sorry for the women you know. How can any one have sex once a month? 12 times a week yes but a year? I have been between my wife's legs every day since since she was 16 and that was 20 years ago.
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Old 08-04-2009, 11:38 AM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,401,447 times
Reputation: 8075
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stac2007 View Post
12 times a year? I feel sorry for the women you know. How can any one have sex once a month? 12 times a week yes but a year?
"done that times 12" means, 12 years without sex. I can't imagine why would anyone stay so long without sex unless you are a nun.
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Old 08-04-2009, 11:40 AM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,401,447 times
Reputation: 8075
Quote:
Originally Posted by thriftylefty View Post
Ever heard of "Breach of Contract" I think it is reasonable for a married person to assume that sex will be part of their relationship and they won't have to beg for it. Under the law the "non breaching" Party is relieved of their duties under the contract.
A-ha, there could be a "breach of contract" and if you use this analogy, then the OP needs to get out off the marriage and fast.
A person who signed a contract in music industry cannot go and cheat with another record label, right?
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Old 08-04-2009, 11:43 AM
 
Location: Rockland County New York
2,984 posts, read 5,863,012 times
Reputation: 1298
Quote:
Originally Posted by max's mama View Post
"done that times 12" means, 12 years without sex. I can't imagine why would anyone stay so long without sex unless you are a nun.
You got that right. Sex is dam good. It's even better when you are having it with some one you truly love. Not to have sex or as little as possible would cause one to cheat. I think there are issues the OP is not telling us.
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Old 08-04-2009, 12:04 PM
Status: "122 N/A" (set 1 day ago)
 
12,969 posts, read 13,707,820 times
Reputation: 9698
Quote:
Originally Posted by max's mama View Post
A-ha, there could be a "breach of contract" and if you use this analogy, then the OP needs to get out off the marriage and fast.
A person who signed a contract in music industry cannot go and cheat with another record label, right?
Its very common in the music industry to engage the services of another entity if you feel you have been breached, Because your career has to go on ,let the courts fight it out. In the same scenario if a person is in divorce court and says "my spouse wouldn't have sex with me for twelve years so I cheated" don't you think they are going to get a little sympathy?
I am also not sure if the definition of "cheating" means explicitly, having sex with more than one person.
IMO People who withhold sex and affection in a marriage are passive aggressive abusers.
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Old 08-04-2009, 12:08 PM
319
 
Location: washington DC
105 posts, read 222,043 times
Reputation: 42
I just love how everyone is SO sanctified about honesty and “doing the right” thing, as if this is an easy situation to remedy.

On another note, your husband may be doing what you are thinking… I know of no man that can go a year..but I am sure they are out there…like those black unicorns.

OPTIONS

1) Do nothing and hope things change. On a scale of 1 – 10 this is a 3. I highly doubt things will change.

2) Talk to him and discuss your needs and how in the heck he can go so long without IT. On a scale of 1 – 10 this is a 3 since you say you have already spoken with him.

3) Save for a divorce and get IT the way you like it.

4) Cheat and don’t get caught.

If you choose 3 or 4 and if you are physically in shape, clean and pretty contact me…
GL

Last edited by 319; 08-04-2009 at 12:56 PM..
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Old 08-04-2009, 12:13 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,401,447 times
Reputation: 8075
Quote:
Originally Posted by thriftylefty View Post
Its very common in the music industry to engage the services of another entity if you feel you have been breached, Because your career has to go on ,let the courts fight it out. In the same scenario if a person is in divorce court and says "my spouse wouldn't have sex with me for twelve years so I cheated" don't you think they are going to get a little sympathy?

***MM - yes, I do, but that's why I'm saying her situation is divorce-worthy, unless changes are done, I can't imagine why she would stay, but I'm NOT advising to cheat.

I am also not sure if the definition of "cheating" means explicitly, having sex with more than one person.
IMO People who withhold sex and affection in a marriage are passive aggressive abusers
***MM - oh, agree with that point too. Neglecting person's physical needs is a form of abuse.
.
Sorry for my inserts, have been working in corporate world for way too long.
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Old 08-04-2009, 12:22 PM
Status: "122 N/A" (set 1 day ago)
 
12,969 posts, read 13,707,820 times
Reputation: 9698
Quote:
Originally Posted by max's mama View Post
Sorry for my inserts, have been working in corporate world for way too long.
I think going after some hot guy or starting an affair would be cheating , but com'on, whats a little "sympathy sex" from an old friend who understands gonna hurt? Like someone who you can be seen with and not arouse suspicion. (hint hint OP)
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