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In another post there was a reply that said something about not having sex was deal breaker in a marriage.
I have been married for 10 years (almost) and I was very sexually active in my younger years and before I was married. However, for "whatever" reason sex has become less and less important to me.
People may say that sex brings people closer together but I feel that my husband and I are very close without it. In fact, I cannot imagine that we would be any closer. When we were first married, of course we had sex much more often, and our relationship is much better now then it was then.
I love my husband very much and would do anything in the world for him (including having sex, when he wishes), but I do not have any desire for it. Which is not the same thing as not having desire for HIM. I simply am not terribly interested in that aspect of our relationship.
I am wondering, just out of curiosity what other people think about it as it relates to their own life/relationships.
I think it depends on the person/couple. In my opinion, the problems arise when one person wants it and the other simply doesn't care for it. You are lucky both you and your husband are on the same wavelength.
In general, as you get older you have other responsibilities - home, kids, more responsibility at work, ect. The bedroom life can take a hit. Some don't mind, but for some sex is a higher priority and thus not having it may be a deal breaker.
Are you going to cry about it when he starts desiring other people or better yet, goes outside of the marriage for sex? If two people agree not to have sex then that is great for them--more power to you, I hope you last a 100 years together, etc.. It would not work for me because I like sex and want to share that part of myself with the other person. So different strokes, I guess.
In another post there was a reply that said something about not having sex was deal breaker in a marriage.
I have been married for 10 years (almost) and I was very sexually active in my younger years and before I was married. However, for "whatever" reason sex has become less and less important to me.
People may say that sex brings people closer together but I feel that my husband and I are very close without it. In fact, I cannot imagine that we would be any closer. When we were first married, of course we had sex much more often, and our relationship is much better now then it was then.
I love my husband very much and would do anything in the world for him (including having sex, when he wishes), but I do not have any desire for it. Which is not the same thing as not having desire for HIM. I simply am not terribly interested in that aspect of our relationship.
I am wondering, just out of curiosity what other people think about it as it relates to their own life/relationships.
20yrsinBranson
It's important to me because we both enjoy it so much, it is an intense way for us to express our feelings about each other, and it absolutely one of the "glues" of our relationship. I don't know if I could be happy in a relationship without sex.
I don't know if I could be happy in a relationship without sex.
Well, I wouldn't be, either, but things do slow down... I doubt there are too many relationships in which the amount of sex is the same as it was in the first few months. Age starts playing a role little by little, too. There's this saying that goes something like this: if you put beans in a jar every time you have sex during the first year and then take them out one by one every time you have sex for the rest of the marriage, you may not run out of them!
Well, I wouldn't be, either, but things do slow down... I doubt there are too many relationships in which the amount of sex is the same as it was in the first few months. Age starts playing a role little by little, too. There's this saying that goes something like this: if you put beans in a jar every time you have sex during the first year and then take them out one by one every time you have sex for the rest of the marriage, you may not run out of them!
Of course they do....I agree. I doubt I'm going to be "warming up" the kitchen counters much when I'm 80. But I still hope to be warming up something!
Of course they do....I agree. I doubt I'm going to be "warming up" the kitchen counters much when I'm 80. But I still hope to be warming up something!
Me too
I don't expect a hot steamy sex life for the rest of my life, but for the first several years it better be hot and steamy! If I wanted a comfortable marriage to someone whose company I enjoyed, made a good living, was kind and considerate, and lousy in bed, I would have married my last boyfriend
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But I still hope to be warming up something!
