I felt like I was at a job interview.......(UGH) (dating, girlfriends)
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I had a date on Friday night and it felt like a job interview. Not only a job interview but a Bad one at that.
The young lady I was with almost got upset when I said "this feels like a job interview". I wonder why?
I tried to avoid talking about anything job related( as I explained to her, let's have fun and worry about that later) such as my job title but she kept prying. I started to become annoyed as to why what I did for a living was of so much importance to her. She knows I work and my shift. For our first date, I did not think it was so important.
I almost never ask women what they do for a living at least not on the first date.
I guess I am more concerned about whether she is a quality person or not. If she has some sort of value system and lives an ethical life. As long as she can take care of her self and she has a legal and ethical job, I could careless. Your job title is not an asset to your character. Nor does it mean you're a upstanding person.
Needless to say, we parted ways on a sour note.
Have any of you ever been on the job interview date?
Since work is where you spend most of your waking life, it is a big part of who you are so I would at least want to know where you worked and what you did. I think I would be suspicious and keep asking questions if you acted evasive or wouldn't tell me your job. It's just such a huge part of someone's life, I can't imagine not finding out what they did on the first date.
Normally when a person asks I just answer. The conversation will last about one minute if they probe because unless a person is in the same field, they wouldn't understand what I'm talking about. My plumber asked what I did on Friday. It didn't bother me. If someone asked what I earned, that would be weird.
Since work is where you spend most of your waking life, it is a big part of who you are so I would at least want to know where you worked and what you did. I think I would be suspicious and keep asking questions if you acted evasive or wouldn't tell me your job. It's just such a huge part of someone's life, I can't imagine not finding out what they did on the first date.
I was thinking similar. If I ask someone and they don't tell me, on or off line, I tend to make a few assumptions. There's one guy here on CD and I've decided that he consults in the selling of widgets lol. I'm sure that's annoying for him.
I think it's extremely natural to talk about what you do for a living especially at that stage. I've had men come up to me and our initial conversation always included, 'so what do you do.' Plus, it's not that personal a question for a first date, it's safe small talk. The thing I don't understand is I've usually seen just the opposite of your reaction. I have girlfriends who are, let's see, a bit on the plumper side. and when we would go out to places they would always have men fawning all of them. And I watched one day to try and figure it out and I noticed they asked men a lot of questions which included a number of them about their job, and diidn't talk about themselves, they took an interest in the man and listened to his responses. Consider, also, that people spend more half their day (in a 12 hour span) at their job.
Since work is where you spend most of your waking life, it is a big part of who you are so I would at least want to know where you worked and what you did. I think I would be suspicious and keep asking questions if you acted evasive or wouldn't tell me your job. It's just such a huge part of someone's life, I can't imagine not finding out what they did on the first date.
I was not evasive. Not at all. About 25% of my week is work related. The issue is was not about not wanting to tell her, she was just to darn formal, I guess.
Than again some people don't and have no idea how to separate the 2.
Yeah, it's not that I am seeking to judge him on what he does. I just want to know how he spends the bulk of his waking life and that would mean knowing his job.
Are you kidding? It's not enough that you hold a job. So does a cook at McD's. Doesn't mean that's dating material if you're 30. While I never ask about a job title, I do ask "what do you do for a livng?" Really, you need to relax about that.
I was not evasive. Not at all. About 25% of my week is work related. The issue is was not about not wanting to tell her, she was just to darn formal, I guess.
Than again some people don't and have no idea how to separate the 2.
What exactly do you mean "formal"? Can you give us an example of something she said?
What exactly do you mean "formal"? Can you give us an example of something she said?
Hey, relax......no need to get riled up. Gee whiz. We're just having a discussion here.
calm down.
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