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I think I already know the answer to this, but recently I've been 'going out' with a guy who is twice my age. We started off as business partners, but then he started taking me out to dinner and movies the past few weekends.
I knew he was attracted to me, but I wasn't sure he wanted to take it to that level. I didnt want to take it to that level either because he's not my type. We havent had sex at all.
Last weekend, he cancelled our 'get together' saying he was busy...and knowing him better than that (since last October), I think he's upset because I'm not putting out to him. He made a few gestures last time he was at my apartment, but I didn't make any moves. I've stayed over at his house several times already...spent 2 days there one time, and he never made any moves on me. So I thought it was all platonic.
The reason I'm not having sex is because #1 we are business partners. We work in photography. #2 he is not my type and I don't want to lead him on just because he buys me dinner and movies.
But at the same time, I feel Im leading him on by letting him pay for my meals. But he always extends the invitation and I just go along with it because I really cant afford but to eat at home right now. Last weekend I ordered a glass of wine with my dinner. Which may have made it to 'datelike' ...I'm a bit of an addict but had I had wine at home like I do now, I would have certainly shared with him.
You need to inform him of your feelings , and either terminate the repertoire , or ascertain that you two are on the same page. Not just page , but down to the letter on this matter. Failure to do so may lead to either party being harmed.
You need to inform him of your feelings , and either terminate the repertoire , or ascertain that you two are on the same page. Not just page , but down to the letter on this matter. Failure to do so may lead to either party being harmed.
That sounds like good advice, do so if it is not too late already.
I think you are blatantly misleading this fellow and using him for a meal ticket.
If I go after a person who is friendly but decisively not-interested, typically she will refer to me as "Friend" or "Bud" if we set up plans to do something, and she might try and split the cost of the meal if we hang out. I'd find it dishonest if she allowed me to take her out and buy her meals (not just one, but for several weekends), take her out and entertain her, and stay at her apartment....only to blindside me like you're about to do with this poor chap.
Yes you do know the answer... you allowed him to take you to dinner, yea thats ok on a one off, but regularly and the movies too, and spending time at his place, you knew exactly what you were doing....leading him on... if he`s not your type you should have made that clear when he offered dinner the second time,.... that`s good he`s cancelled your get-together, you`ve been sussed out!
I don't think you really need to have a deep chat with him. He cancelled your last scheduled get-together which is probably an indication that for whatever reason he's become less comfortable with the relationship. Since nothing has actually happened between the two of you then just let it go.
Eat at home and, if he suggests getting together again, make sure you can pay your half of the bill or otherwise beg off until you can. You obviously gave him mixed signals.
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...I'm a bit of an addict but had I had wine at home like I do now, I would have certainly shared with him.
