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Yes, and that is why I think Amish women are actually freer than many women who have an "ordinary" lifestyle. Freer from the pressure, the stress, from juggling the many responsibilities of career, family and others' expectations. Freer to be themselves, not the image of a "successful" woman that the media creates. As a woman, I believe I would have enjoyed that kind of lifestyle.
Farming and relentless childbearing sounds less stressful?
Amish women have the option of either leaving or staying, so they aren't forced to say there if they don't want to.
Yes and no.
Of course technically anyone can leave any sect at any time but at a nonzero and possibly massively huge cost. A woman without skills to survive / earn money in the larger world, who has no allies in the larger world that she knows and trusts, particularly if she has children to support, may well decide for that and related reasons that she has no REAL choice. Also isolationist groups like the Amish provide a sort of addictive insulation from having to deal with the very real dangers in the real world, and the very real responsibilities that one might take up there.
The Amish have a tradition that translates to "running around" for their newly minted young adults where they are allowed to indulge the flesh as it were, do as they please, and then decide either to stay or leave. However it isn't a simple matter of leaving, as they will be shunned, and it's also a one-time opportunity that isn't just an open-ended offer. It is really just a canny technique to remove the mystery from "running around", and the experience is almost guaranteed, given their inexperience and naïveté, to be awkward if not unpleasant -- and it's just about guaranteed to trip guilt triggers that have been built into them from childhood.
So like many sects, the Amish have the appearance of reasonableness and openness of a kind, but it's largely illusory. Their authoritarian / mind control games are superficially deniable but palpably present.
It isn't really even unique to the Amish, as I said the same could be said of any sect, or really of any unhappy or abusive marriage.
Women in the in suburbs have a plethora of modern conveniences to lighten the load, not mention far fewer children to care for.
Amish women may (very arguably) feel less alienated and less lacking in social support systems but as you point out they need all that extra support because of all the children and manual labor, and their addiction to that social reciprocity will make the outside world all the scarier, the better to cement them in place.
Farming and relentless childbearing sounds less stressful?
Of course. Farming is more physically difficult, but it is far less mentally and spiritually draining than an average office job. Childbearing does not have to be relentless, even if you do not believe in the pill or abortion, there are natural ways of contraception. And instead of appliances, these women have each other and their loving husbands.
Amish women may (very arguably) feel less alienated and less lacking in social support systems but as you point out they need all that extra support because of all the children and manual labor, and their addiction to that social reciprocity will make the outside world all the scarier, the better to cement them in place.
Amish women may (very arguably) feel less alienated and less lacking in social support systems but as you point out they need all that extra support because of all the children and manual labor, and their addiction to that social reciprocity will make the outside world all the scarier, the better to cement them in place.
I think that's the lure of living in a fairly closed society, where people invariably follow the same life path that has been followed for hundreds of years. I don't know, I guess for some it holds appeal; to me it feels too constricting not be able to make and own my own choices.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Norne
Of course. Farming is more physically difficult, but it is far less mentally and spiritually draining than an average office job. Childbearing does not have to be relentless, even if you do not believe in the pill or abortion, there are natural ways of contraception. And instead of appliances, these women have each other and their loving husbands.
I think you may be romanticizing Amish life a bit much. However, if that is the lifestyle that appeals to you, you have every right to create it for yourself.
Last edited by Ginge McFantaPants; 10-11-2016 at 12:34 PM..
I live & work in the largest Amish community. If they leave prior to baptism, they are not "shunned", yes the parents will be disappointed, but it happens. After they're baptized, they've pretty much committed to that lifestyle for life, they know what they're getting into. Also, it's mainly the older orders of the Amish church that adheres to such strict rules. I know several who have left the faith and still have a relationship with their families. I also know more than one Amish wife who wears the theoretical pants in the family!
One line of my family is Amish and this is my experience. Lol...the women I'm related to are not exactly shrinking violets. Amish are Swiss-German and the strength and determination of Amish women reflects that. Their sect, which is among the most liberal of the Amish, does not shun.
The reality TV shows about the Amish are good for two things: looking at the scenery and hearing their language. Other than that they portray the Amish about as well as an episode of the Kardashians portrays a normal family.
Last edited by DewDropInn; 10-11-2016 at 12:27 PM..
One line of my family is Amish and this is my experience. Lol...the women I'm related to are not exactly shrinking violets. Amish are Swiss-German and the strength and determination of Amish women reflects that. Their sect, which is among the most liberal of the Amish, does not shun.
The reality TV shows about the Amish are good for two things: looking at the scenery and hearing their language. Other than that they portray the Amish about as well as an episode of the Kardashians portrays a normal family.
Do the Amish in America still speak a dialect of German? Gelassenheit and all that?
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