Deciding whether to attend 50th high school reunion (beach, divorce, alcohol)

[catsy girl]

my 50th high school reunion will be held this fall, and i'm trying to decide whether to attend. i have never attended any reunions thus far, although i've enjoyed receiving the memory book with current information on classmates. there were 650 in my high school class, and even though i went through elementary school with some i later graduated with, i've never kept up with anyone after about the first year out of school.
in the last few years i've re-connected with three of my former classmates and we have met once or twice and exchange e-mails occasionally. i've enjoyed this but don't know if these experiences warrant my attending the reunion. i no longer live in the town where i went to school, and, if there were former classmates i'd meet and connect with at the reunion, i assume most of them would still be living in my hometown or in other areas farther away. consequently, i don't forsee a lot of future contacts. also, i would think that a lot of the talk at this point would be about children and grandchildren. i didn't choose to have children and although i can be polite during these conversations, quite frankly, it becomes boring fairly quickly.
so, i'm interested in your thoughts and your experiences if you have attended your reunions. also i'd be interested if anyone has regretted not attending.
thanks-
catsy girl

[greatblueheron]

50...where did all those years get to, right? The only one I attended was year 40 and basically there was so little time, all we did is greet one another....I too did not have children so can understand your comments. I no longer live where I grew up either (thank goodness) and truthfully, many of the ones just did not show that I would have enjoyed seeing, if only briefly.

Guess it depends on how far away you are, if there is anyone special you would love to see....honestly, the ones that were annoying or snide or losers as well as the ones who were bright, funny or popular, they were all the same as 40 yrs. ago.

If you go....just have fun. It is only one day, after all.

[Bette]

I am from a big class of over 1000. A lot happened during our time there. Times were turbulent (early/mid 1970's). We went on split shifts b/c the school population was too large. School almost lost accredidation.

I have gone to the reunions and been involved with planning a few. Please go. At the last reunion, someone took a picture of me with another guest. That guest was killed in a cycling accident near the beach last year. So glad we have that picture and good memories of him.

You will find your former classmates have been through a lot. We started doing mini-reunions a few years 50-100 miles from the school at various locations for anyone that graduated during the 1970's.

I had not been to one until last year and I must admit, it was packed. Everyone was so friendly and people I didn't even know spoke to me. I actually connected with a couple of people that weren't so nice to me back then and are now stand up people and have had beautiful lives!

For our next reunion, there are several people interested in attending that have never attended and many are coming from across the country. People are very excited to see them and I do think (sometimes) looking at their FB profile does help.

I think if you went you would have a great time. Ours has always been a weekend event.

[wit-nit]

10th re-union: everyone talks about how successful they are, the cliques, the jocks, the cheerleaders all mingle together and exagerate, all others sit quietly and sip their drinks and very little conversation.

25th re-union: everyone talks about their kids and grandchildren, how successful they've been, how many trips around the world they been on, exageration exageration exageration.

50th re-union: 10% of the class attend, you hear some are in jail, some are dead, sit around and talk about your ailments and pills you're taking, everyone except you looks so old, go home say never again.

[Ol' Wanderer]

During high school, the majority of my 250 classmates were beach bums, even the brainiest ones. Not a surprise since our school was and still is located two short blocks from the beach.

Among the alumni at our 40th reunion in 2007, there were physicians, nurses, lawyers, pilots, clerks, explorers, professors, genocide scholar, artists, professional athletes, scientists, large and small business owners, homemakers, veterans, government employees, blue-collar workers, inventors, and retirees. Many attended with their spouses, many came alone, and a few were with their dates. Some went through multiple divorces; some buried their spouses. Many were financial independent; many were smack dab in middle class. Photos were shown, some were of children and grandchildren, but a lot was taken four decades earlier.

After 40 years, the jocks and the cheerleaders looked the same as the intellects and the wallflowers. Some enhancements were evident among the women, but that's normal in Southern California. I did not witness anyone bragging of his or her own achievements, perhaps because through the email network, we all knew what happened in most people's lives.

I was not actively in touch with most of my classmates before the event and was reluctant to travel a long way to attend it. However, once I was there, I felt very comfortable seeing friends and acquaintances, and it looked to me the gathering was enjoyable for all. Looking back, I'm glad I did not miss that rare opportunity to see my old friends, especially because a few of them had passed away since then.

[Hemlock140]

Despite having connected with several classmates on Facebook I decided to continue my perfect record and not attend the recent 40th. The people I was closest to have dropped out of sight, and have never attended any either, so there seemed no point in traveling to see people I didn't know that well.

[AcaciaRose]

For me, being Facebook friends with a few of my former classmates is enough. 90% of their posts are about their grandchildren and great-grandchildren; 5% are about their snowbird travels to the southwest. I like the casual Facebook encounters and enjoy seeing their photos, but don't want to spend money on airline tickets and hotels to hear the same conversations in person.

[LynnKK]

You have nothing to lose by going and you will never, ever see most of them again. My reunion is also this Fall and I wrestled with the same questions you have. I decided that those who spend their entire year planning this event should be respected by those who can go. It is just a head count to see who can still sit up and take nourishment, but as said before, it is just one day/evening out of your life. Try not to make more of this event than it actually is.

[Bette]

At ours, we are dispensing with all the hokey stuff. My idea. Even though we will have a DJ, we're into making it fun and really celebrating the era and times we grew up in. I know there were negative things, sure, but we're looking for the positives and just celebrating each other.

And, what's all this about barely sitting up? The people I know are extremely active and once that music starts with all that good music, no one is in their seats!!

We've asked graduates to bring pictures of the old days - how they remember it - not so much each other. Actually, to tell you the truth, I was struck by how good so many people looked.

[BabyBoomers2]

I was single when I went to my 20 yr Reunion in 1988......it was fun. Had a beer keg, food and played some games. I was a part-time horse trainer at the time and everyone was shocked when I showed up with a cowboy hat, jeans and boots on. My "looks" got them and some of their "looks" really got me! I had gained some much-needed weight, but some of them had gained quite a bit since graduation in '68. One dude was on our Varsity Basketball team in h.s., pretty slim/trim, but he really put on the weight......very close to obese size!
Last year (2010) was our 42 yr one, but I didn't go. Wife and I were both unemployed and didn't have the finances to drive or fly to it (900 miles north of us). Not only that, the Reunion was being held in a room at a local church and no alcohol was allowed. One of my classmates got the room for free. Even if the finances were there, the Reunion being held at a church and being "dry" was just too much for us.
Some of my classmates are on Facebook, as I am, and it's cool to talk to them on there. There are some pics on FB of the Reunion and I was shocked at how much darn gray hair is in my class! My hair isn't gray cause I use Just For Men no mustache, temples and sideburns. Actually, there is a dude that I graduated with and him and his wife look old enough to be my wife's and I parents!!