Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 05-23-2013, 08:09 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,016 posts, read 20,910,117 times
Reputation: 32530

Advertisements

Maybe I am too pessimistic, morbid, or fearful, but reading in the Retirement Forum will sooner or later bring one to the subject of giving up driving. I simply cannot imagine myself not driving. I value my independence of movement, I am often on the go, and it is beyond scary to contemplate life without a car. This is true for me even though I live within easy walking distance (one mile) of a great number of things - library, banks, supermarket, barber shops, restaurants, post office, and more. But my life as presently constituted at age 69 takes me beyond those places, and fairly often.

Emperor Hirohito rather famously spoke to his subjects about "thinking the unthinkable and bearing the unbearable" in his radio address of August 15, 1945.

How are you doing with that? I am handling it by being in denial that it could ever happen.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-23-2013, 08:17 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 21,974,809 times
Reputation: 15773
Having had to face harsh realities all of my life, one day giving up driving does not register high on my list of anxieties. It is a natural part of decline, and we'd all better make peace with that. Being inventive, I will figure out ways to get around; my ego doesn't have to be the one to drive. I will welcome any form of transport and be happy if I can still get in and out of a vehicle.

That said, I can empathize with those who need to be in the driver's seat. It is a major form of freedom. (I guess I;m working on internal freedoms, not external.) I would say get together with a few friends and talk about this and other life issues. Usually the fear of something is far less terrible than the reality. It will be a loss, to be sure, though.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 09:07 PM
 
Location: The beautiful Rogue Valley, Oregon
7,785 posts, read 18,830,750 times
Reputation: 10783
Having had to deal with it for first my father and then my in-laws, plus having my own vision problems such that I can't drive at night or in heavy rain or dense shadow or flickering shadow, it's really not quite so unthinkable for me.

Maybe cornea transplants will fix it, maybe not and I am done driving at 55-56. We'll "see" next year.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 09:11 PM
 
Location: Texas
44,259 posts, read 64,375,553 times
Reputation: 73937
Baby steps.
Put the car away...get a golf cart.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 09:40 PM
 
11,181 posts, read 10,534,651 times
Reputation: 18618
Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
I value my independence of movement, I am often on the go, and it is beyond scary to contemplate life without a car. This is true for me even though I live within easy walking distance (one mile) of a great number of things - library, banks, supermarket, barber shops, restaurants, post office, and more. But my life as presently constituted at age 69 takes me beyond those places, and fairly often.
Although my general metro area is one of the most car-dependent in the nation, I live in the same type situation as you in that just about everything essential is within walking distance.
I'm 64 and figure I have maybe 15 good driving years left, barring some unforeseen circumstance. I'm not bothered in the abstract by the idea. It might be a relief to have an excuse not to drive in crazy traffic surrounded by drivers who are either texting or are even older and more mentally feeble than I am.

What DOES scare me, if I let the thought in, is the idea of being stricken with some condition that renders me non-ambulatory. But I don't obsess over it. Other people, many younger than me, have learned to cope. I will, too, if that time comes.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 09:42 PM
 
3,183 posts, read 7,205,533 times
Reputation: 1818
Interesting topic. Driving has been one of my most enjoyable task for the past 45 years. But as I get older I am becoming more intimidated by the dangerous things I can not avoid. Things like people texting and drinking and speeding and causing accidents etc. My solution for my later years when I will have to give it up is to able to afford a taxi to my near by doctor and food store and then be content to enjoy staying at home. Perhaps move to a retirement community and not even own a home .The older you get the more logic and financial since it makes anyway.There is no such thing as talking a nice sunday drive in the country any more around here.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 09:42 PM
 
11,181 posts, read 10,534,651 times
Reputation: 18618
Quote:
Originally Posted by newenglandgirl View Post
Having had to face harsh realities all of my life, one day giving up driving does not register high on my list of anxieties. It is a natural part of decline, and we'd all better make peace with that. Being inventive, I will figure out ways to get around; my ego doesn't have to be the one to drive. I will welcome any form of transport and be happy if I can still get in and out of a vehicle.

That said, I can empathize with those who need to be in the driver's seat. It is a major form of freedom. (I guess I;m working on internal freedoms, not external.) I would say get together with a few friends and talk about this and other life issues. Usually the fear of something is far less terrible than the reality. It will be a loss, to be sure, though.
I bolded the one part but to your entire post.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 10:09 PM
 
Location: earth?
7,284 posts, read 12,928,336 times
Reputation: 8956
If I have enough money to hire people to drive me around, I doubt I will care that much.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-23-2013, 11:59 PM
 
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
10,930 posts, read 11,727,236 times
Reputation: 13170
I have had a real life experience of this. I live in Denmark. At age 70 you have to get a medical check-up and apply for a new license, good for 4 years. The next license is good for 2 years. After that, it's every year.

Well, to make a long story short: my family doctor is required by law to give the medical oversight board every part of my history and they can also check this on a medical data base for every resident of Denmark. One item - a short-duration (a few seconds) black out - triggered a stroke warning. License denied! The old one was invalidated.

My first reaction: move back to the US. I could never imagine not driving again. This would involve divorcing my wife; moving back to a country I have only visited (2x yearly) for 17 years; living alone in W. Podunk Missouri (where housing prices cheap); paying for sex;.....you, the OP, know the drill.

One can appeal these decisions. I went to a neurologist a number of times. He required a MRI scan. Sure enough, there was 1 small lesion on my brain. It could have happened from 3 months to 60+ years ago. He sent to an ultra-sound examination. No issues at all with my arteries to the brain. All this was sent to the oversight board. Shortly later, I received a letter from them that they had no record of my case! Back to the family doctor: another check-up; and then to the neurologist; another MRI; and other Ultra Sound (just to be on the safe side).

About 4 months later ( about 7 months after I had originally applied). I finally got cleared and my new license would be sent to me by the police. Add another month. I still have not received it.

But a happy ending. However, in the mean time, I became crazy, fixated, certain of failure, looking forward to my dismal future without out my wife...jus to drive a FU--ing car when i am on vacation (we have excellent public transport in Denmark).

Yes, I understand.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-24-2013, 12:13 AM
 
Location: earth?
7,284 posts, read 12,928,336 times
Reputation: 8956
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frihed89 View Post
I have had a real life experience of this. I live in Denmark. At age 70 you have to get a medical check-up and apply for a new license, good for 4 years. The next license is good for 2 years. After that, it's every year.

Well, to make a long story short: my family doctor is required by law to give the medical oversight board every part of my history and they can also check this on a medical data base for every resident of Denmark. One item - a short-duration (a few seconds) black out - triggered a stroke warning. License denied! The old one was invalidated.

My first reaction: move back to the US. I could never imagine not driving again. This would involve divorcing my wife; moving back to a country I have only visited (2x yearly) for 17 years; living alone in W. Podunk Missouri (where housing prices cheap); paying for sex;.....you, the OP, know the drill.

One can appeal these decisions. I went to a neurologist a number of times. He required a MRI scan. Sure enough, there was 1 small lesion on my brain. It could have happened from 3 months to 60+ years ago. He sent to an ultra-sound examination. No issues at all with my arteries to the brain. All this was sent to the oversight board. Shortly later, I received a letter from them that they had no record of my case! Back to the family doctor: another check-up; and then to the neurologist; another MRI; and other Ultra Sound (just to be on the safe side).

About 4 months later ( about 7 months after I had originally applied). I finally got cleared and my new license would be sent to me by the police. Add another month. I still have not received it.

But a happy ending. However, in the mean time, I became crazy, fixated, certain of failure, looking forward to my dismal future without out my wife...jus to drive a FU--ing car when i am on vacation (we have excellent public transport in Denmark).

Yes, I understand.
OMG. Does your wife know about your priorities? I hope you are joking because this is one crazy story . . .
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Retirement

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:44 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top