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Old 12-29-2015, 08:32 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,605 posts, read 31,487,261 times
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Between us we have 14 grandchildren and one great grandchild but they're all "ours."

In direct response to the rather strange question coming from an under-30, "No!" and I don't intend to.
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Old 12-29-2015, 09:04 PM
 
10,817 posts, read 8,065,019 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Curmudgeon View Post
In direct response to the rather strange question coming from an under-30, "No!" and I don't intend to.
+1.
The under-30 OP seems to be addressing some mythical group of old folks obsessed with waiting for the good Lord to take them. The good Lord and I have discussed this and agree that He's the one doing the waiting and that all is well with my soul. That's not something my 30-something children could possibly understand or relate to so there's no point in having that talk.
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Old 12-30-2015, 05:54 AM
 
4,343 posts, read 6,058,509 times
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No. I'm here to live and I want to be remembered for living, laughing and enjoying my life while I'm here.
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Old 12-30-2015, 08:06 AM
 
Location: Backwoods of Maine
7,116 posts, read 8,156,220 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
It just seems strange that she is so obsessed with her own demise and talking about it with her children and grandchildren endlessly.
I always say, death is not an event, it's a process. Your grandmother is not "obsessed with her own demise". She could pass on at any time, if she's talking like that. It means, she's seeing the light that will show her the way. At age 29, you won't see that light, not for a very long time. But it will be there for you too, at some point.

My 6 grands will have plenty to remember me by: 2 years of college free for each of them, 3 separate homes to be held in trust for them, and a business income that will be enough to at least feed them. One thing I never want to see, is any of my grands to end up uneducated, homeless, or hungry. I've done what I can.

The one thing you can do, OP, that will make you happy later in life, is to take your smartphone and maybe a video camera or tape recorder, and re-visit all your oldest living relatives (including any elderly aunts or uncles). Take pictures. Take videos. Record them speaking, working, interacting. Photograph their faces, hands, clothing, their home. Write down their family histories, their life stories. Then put all that on a portable hard drive, and keep it safe somewhere. Someday, you will be glad you have those things!
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Old 12-30-2015, 08:30 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,581 posts, read 17,574,904 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ABQ2015 View Post
My Southern great grandmother used to carry on like the OP described. She was in her early 80's and confined to her home as she had broken her hip. My mother acted in a similar manner her last years in a nursing home. Both were religious, not well educated or sophisticated, and dirt poor. I always attributed this behavior to being crazy Southerners and not having desirable living circumstances so the afterlife looked very attractive.
I think this explains a lot of it. They're Southern, and while not dirt poor or extremely uneducated, are just from a different time. I've heard the "take me home Lord" line from lots of older relatives in Tennessee.
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Old 12-30-2015, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,581 posts, read 17,574,904 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by biscuitmom View Post
+1.
The under-30 OP seems to be addressing some mythical group of old folks obsessed with waiting for the good Lord to take them. The good Lord and I have discussed this and agree that He's the one doing the waiting and that all is well with my soul. That's not something my 30-something children could possibly understand or relate to so there's no point in having that talk.
I'm not particularly religious and am in good health, so I personally can't relate to seeing my life slip away, but to infer that people in their 20s/30s don't think about or understand the "life after me" dynamic is just not accurate.

A lady that graduated high school a few years before me (so early 30s) recently passed from a fairly long bout with cancer. Another couple I went to church with about five years ago had a son that had some exotic disease and was in and out of a prestigious children's hospital for many years before passing. Just over the last month, I've had one friend and one high school classmate either die or end up in hospice. Granted, people who are dying in their 20s/30s are often dying suddenly or because of their own vices, but there are those who do end up sick and I'm certain can relate quite well.
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Old 12-30-2015, 11:42 AM
 
Location: SoCal
13,229 posts, read 6,335,450 times
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I hope they remember my ribs, their parents have told me I've spoiled them with my home cooking, especially ribs. They have not ordered them in restaurant because they have not able to have better experience, especially here in California. I've created blog or tumbler to tell them exactly how I do my ribs. I hope that's how they remember me.
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Old 12-30-2015, 10:22 PM
 
Location: Florida Gulf Coast
4,406 posts, read 5,926,580 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
I went back home for Christmas and talked to 3/4 of my remaining grandparents. I'm 29 and only one is dead, and he died when I was 23, so I've had all my grandparents well into adulthood.

I went to see my father's parents, his dad was a lifelong severe alcoholic, and his mother seems to be mentally slipping. They're both 80 and 81. He's mentally fine, but she'll prattle on about how the grandchildren will do after her, how she wants her final wishes, how she feels like the Lord is coming back soon, etc. She seems to be talking about her death and the end of the world as if they are absolutely imminent, but she has no serious health problems to my knowledge other than some bad knees.

It just seems strange that she is so obsessed with her own demise and talking about it with her children and grandchildren endlessly. It's also hard to tell whether there even is much cognitive decline, as she's always just babbled on about the end of the world, talked in circles, etc.

Did you talk about your own decline/death with your grandchildren? How did the younger family react?
Hey, I've got the perfect job for you, or maybe this IS your job -- you know how some books have suggested "Book Club" questions at the end? That's what your questions remind me of. Always trying to stimulate a "serious conversation", you are. So now I am even more suspicious that you are compiling all this info for a book. Totally not normal for a 29-year-old to care about all these "senior" issues......
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Old 12-31-2015, 07:37 AM
 
4,481 posts, read 4,743,979 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Avalon08 View Post
Hey, I've got the perfect job for you, or maybe this IS your job -- you know how some books have suggested "Book Club" questions at the end? That's what your questions remind me of. Always trying to stimulate a "serious conversation", you are. So now I am even more suspicious that you are compiling all this info for a book. Totally not normal for a 29-year-old to care about all these "senior" issues......

How many have said this about the OP? YET.... people keep answering the questions. Many people are like cattle.
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Old 12-31-2015, 01:59 PM
 
Location: Near a river
16,042 posts, read 18,978,143 times
Reputation: 15649
Quote:
Originally Posted by Avalon08 View Post
Hey, I've got the perfect job for you, or maybe this IS your job -- you know how some books have suggested "Book Club" questions at the end? That's what your questions remind me of. Always trying to stimulate a "serious conversation", you are. So now I am even more suspicious that you are compiling all this info for a book. Totally not normal for a 29-year-old to care about all these "senior" issues......
He probably writes the "Next Avenue" series for the age 50+ crowd on PBS. Easy pickings here for his articles, as we bare all.
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