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I don't think that I've ever actively done anything to try to create happiness in my life. I know that I have a plethora of things that presently make me happy- too many to name. I believe happiness and contentment is a choice.
I made a New Year's resolution to say, out loud every night, 3 things for which I was thankful that day. Right after I go to bed each night I say, out loud, "I'm very thankful that..."
It can be something as small as being thankful for the fact that the grass seed has started to germinate or that my new washing machine works so well -- or something bigger like my dog's malignant tumor being gone.
I didnt realize how much happier, and more content with my life, doing that would make me. And I found that it's important to say it out loud because that helps me concentrate on the good things for which I'm being thankful.
Yes, I like to concentrate on the good things in my life.
Happiness isn't a goal. There's no creating it. Be content and grateful with what you have. Happiness happens when you're relaxed and content. It sneaks up on you.
Yeh, seeking happiness is like looking for the dark with a floodlight, the very pursuit dispels the peacefulness required to enjoy it. Its there all along under all the baloney we generate in our own life.
Gratitude breeds attitude.
I have heard retired people say making friends gets harder as you get older. What are they not doing right?
Perhaps expecting/wanting more of a new relationship than is possible to find in these times. Personally, I see depth in interactions of many kinds, receding. We live in an increasingly hurried, disposable world ; the relationships we may have known in the past where leisurely conversation allowed people to really get to know one another, is harder to find.
If having meaningful friendships of some depth is a means of creating happiness, I feel it often can be a tough road.
I count my blessings. I have also trained myself to "cut the self indulgent crap". Right now, dh and I are in a good place...fairly healthy and enough money to get by. The kids and grandkids are doing well.
I have a tendency to worry about "what ifs". I especially tend to stew in the middle of the night. I also stew about past mistakes, which is ridiculous. I allow myself to stew for a few minutes on one side, then turn over on my other side, where I am not allowed to think about the worrisome things.
I also know, from experience, that the things I worry about at night do not worry me at all during the day. I also know that my worrying will not change anything, only action will. So unless I can do something to change a thing that's worrying me, I let it go.
Contentment, I think that is the thing most are attempting to describe as "happiness." I set aside a few minutes every morning to take note of all the blessings I've received. My health, wealth, good marriage, no family drama, good friends, the help I've received--as well as given, and--the reward of contentment derived from all the positives in my life..
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