anyone moved from MD to San Jose? (Los Angeles, San Diego: transplants, big house)

[poetpoet]

My husband got a job offer in San Jose. We now live in Maryland, good schools, big house, family is here, but the job is good for him. We can't decide! We have a 12 and 9 year old, boys, hate to disrupt their schooling. Has anyone made the move from east coast to west? How did it go? I know housing is lots more there, but that's not such a concern. Its more the schools and neighborhoods and quality of life. Thanks

[gizmo980]

My family is originally from Maryland (Silver Spring & Rockville), but we moved to the Bay Area in 1983... at that time I was 7, my sister was 9, and my brother was 2 years old. So I can speak from the child's perspective, and I'm personally glad we grew up here instead of Maryland. We also ended up here because of my dad's job, since they offered him a promotion if he'd move to San Francisco. I know my parents struggled with the decision, especially since the company also offered a few other cities (NYC, Dallas, LA, and Atlanta). But they fell in love with this area, and decided it was the right place for us! Of course this was over 20 years ago, so the schools and general quality of life have changed... it hasn't changed that much, though, so I'd still recommend it - assuming your salaries will enable you to live comfortably. But you need to figure out your top priorities, and balance these against the negatives/positives of moving here... a "cost-benefit analysis", as my father would call it.

Life is very different out here, from the weather to the politics & people, etc., so your kids will change a bit - whether you consider this good or bad, I guess depends on your personal views. We realize how different it's made us, when visiting our relatives who still live back east. But we all love being Californians now, and my sister, mother & I are still living in the area... my brother currently lives down in San Diego. My father moved back to D.C. recently for another job (he's divorced & re-married now); but he still has a home here, and plans to return when he retires. Final thought, the one negative about moving cross-country is the separation from relatives. I sometimes envy people who's family is all local, since I never had that closeness with mine. But we made our own family out here, with a number of close friends whom I consider my relatives... some we've known since the year we moved, and they are my aunts, uncles and cousins. Anyway, hope this gives you a little insight, and good luck in your decision!

[poetpoet]

Thanks for the info. We have spent lots of time in the bay area, visiting friends, traveling for work, and we love the area, but had heard mixed things about the schools, that there are good schools but you have to be careful where you buy a house. We could afford to get something, but we would have to do a MAJOR downsizing (like 1/2) and also my family is here on the east coast (although, I must admit we don't see them much due to busy schedules...every holiday though!) . Maybe we will consider retiring there once the kids are grown, but for now I think we'll probably stay here and suffer through the extreme weather! One thing I would find difficult is going to the beach and freezing our butts off in the water. It's COLD iin that ocean!

[lieder]

I grew up in Maryland and moved to San Jose nearly 2 years ago. In between the move, I lived in cities in three other states, in different regions of the country.

By far, San Jose is my least favorite place I have ever lived. I like being a Californian and how it has changed my view of the world as I've gotten older, but SJ will never feel like home. The people are very, very unfriendly, much more so than in Los Angeles. The city is ethnically diverse, but it is far from a melting pot. Many of the people who move here from other countries work very hard to maintain their own culture and language instead of learning English and assimilating. That's fine, but it explains why you will frequently have people walk right into you at the mall, or pushing you out of their way, etc etc. Because of this, it can be very difficult to meet people, make new friends, and put down roots.

As a teacher, I believe that the schools in CA are the worst I have seen. I can always tell when I meet a native Californian who has attended public schools (and even some of the private schools) within the last 20 years or so. Don't expect your child to have any extracurricular activities or arts education, unless you want to write a check for several thousand dollars to the PTA each fall for these "extras".

The food here is terrible. If you want a decent sandwich, you'll have to eat at Quizno's. Pizza? Forget about it. Even the chain restaurants here aren't the same quality as in other states. We have to drive up to to SFO every time we want a good meal. Despite that, I've lost 17 pounds since I moved here, and I was not at all overweight before.

The worst part for us is the lack of young people. People our age (30) have left the area in droves because of the cost of living and the overall lack of culture and things to do. The weather is great, but it can't make up for everything else we are missing.

Sorry to be such a sourpuss, but I think it's important to give my honest opinion. If my husband could get a job in MD, we'd move back in a heartbeat, if for no other reasons, than the steamed crabs!

[krudmonk]

You have to go to SF (SFO is an airport, genius) to get a good meal? That's one of the most ignorant things I've read here. You're like many stories I read from transplants. You come here and settle into one neighborhood that sucks and you think the area is terrible. I don't recommend living on the south side because it is a cultural wasteland, but does that mean I think the whole city sucks? Absolutely not. I'm not that closed-minded.

[landrover06]

Originally Posted by poetpoet

My husband got a job offer in San Jose. We now live in Maryland, good schools, big house, family is here, but the job is good for him. We can't decide! We have a 12 and 9 year old, boys, hate to disrupt their schooling. Has anyone made the move from east coast to west? How did it go? I know housing is lots more there, but that's not such a concern. Its more the schools and neighborhoods and quality of life. Thanks

What is it that concerns you most about the schools and neighborhoods? What have you heard? What are you used to? What is most important to you in defining a high quality of life for you and your family? What does your husband do for a living? You?

Sorry for so many questions. Your answers help me understand your perspective and expectations better.

[lieder]

Sorry Krudmonk, I don't live in South SJ, I live in the heart of the city. And I've spent my entire time here exploring the entire city and south bay area, as I do each time I move to a new city.

Know anyone in the restaurant business in SJ? I do. They'll tell you over and over again that it's impossible to attract good chefs to this area, and it's a problem nearly every restaurant owner throughout the city has dealt with. Most area chefs don't see SJ as a viable place to build their careers. Furthermore, I have yet to meet anyone from SJ, native or longtime transplants, that doesn't head north, at least to Sunnyvale or Palo Alto, nearly every time they go out to eat.

I am aware that SFO is an airport, but many people confuse SF with San Fernando, and it's a generally accepted abbreviation for the city. I'm not the ignoramus.

[Jim Finn]

nearly every time they go out to eat.

I am aware that SFO is an airport, but many people confuse SF with San Fernando, and it's a generally accepted abbreviation for the city. I'm not the ignoramus.[/quote]
Yes you are! SFO the airport is not even IN SanFrancisco. San Fornando is 400+ miles south! I lived in San Jose area 22 years, and grew up in Wisconsin. I lived in Maryland 5 years also. San Jose is great! MANY places for fine food. I moved to San Jose (West edge) from Wisconsin in 79 when my children were 10 and 12. My kids still live there and always told me they are sure glad we moved there . I have since moved on to MD and currently in Texas. The people in Calif. are niceer than those in Wisconsin or Maryland but not quite as nice as the folks here in Texas. If you can afford the housing costs in San Jose it is a great place to live and work. Retirement is better out of that high cost, high taxed state though. One of the things I first noticed in San Jose is the ABUNDENCE of young people and lack of older folks! Retireing there is too pricey.
Yes you are an ignoramus!

[Luke9686]

I have had no problem finding good food. I am from Iowa and the selection here is great.

Oh, and make sure you "really" can do the housing thing before you move here. Try $800,000 for a 3 bed with a tiny lot. Not to discourage you, but a lot of people don't have a full reality on just how expensive homes are here.

[krudmonk]

Originally Posted by lieder

Sorry Krudmonk, I don't live in South SJ, I live in the heart of the city.

I was using it as an example of part that I don't really care for, even though I like the city as a whole.

Originally Posted by lieder

Know anyone in the restaurant business in SJ? I do. They'll tell you over and over again that it's impossible to attract good chefs to this area, and it's a problem nearly every restaurant owner throughout the city has dealt with. Most area chefs don't see SJ as a viable place to build their careers. Furthermore, I have yet to meet anyone from SJ, native or longtime transplants, that doesn't head north, at least to Sunnyvale or Palo Alto, nearly every time they go out to eat.

I see you're talking NYC-class restaurants. I'm not into fine cuisine, plus I can't eat at most places since I'm a vegan. I'll take a quality hole-in-the-wall gem anytime, and there are TONS of those across the valley.

Originally Posted by lieder

I am aware that SFO is an airport, but many people confuse SF with San Fernando, and it's a generally accepted abbreviation for the city. I'm not the ignoramus.

Yes, you are. People around here know that SFO is the airport so they'd never use it when referring to the city itself. The only place I've seen that done is Portland (PDX). Furthermore, San Frenando is generally known by the whole San Fernando Valley area, which is always abbreviated as SFV.