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Not just me, research show that most people tend to like others who have different views. There is nothing wrong about arguing as long as it is intellectual and based on facts (not prejudice or petty bickering). Yet my observations is that in real life, most Canadians avoid expressing strong opinions or any disagreements. If I say something they don't agree with, they simply keep silent, and only speak when they agree. Gosh, these people are incredibly boring.
Well, we do like to keep the peace.
If you really want to engage them in a conversation about opinions, make that step. Say to them, what do you think about....? Once you open the door they might voice their opinion more freely.
How well you know the person also plays a part. I know that if I'm in a group setting and someone just voices an opinion about something, without any hint they want anyone else viewpoint, I might keep silent if I disagree. Depends. If it's something particular offensive I'll speak up, but if not, I may choose to let it slide.
Not every get together has to be shouting matches about who is right.
Honestly I don't think Toronto is "Crazy expensive"... what nonsense is that? It is probably more expensive than a typical US city, but US cities are known to be cheap in general. Compare Toronto with any other western cities I doubt it stand out as "crazy expensive". Even in comparing with American cities you need to compared with Chicago, San Francisco, Boston, Los Angeles etc, and I don't think it is that expensive.
Gas is expensive? That is a typical American style complaint. Outside the US and a handful of oil producing countries, Toronto's gas price is cheap. Try Tokyo, Oslo or Paris.
Public transit is bad and expensive true. I won't argue about it. But in cities like Chicago or Boston, one bus ride is not cheaper either, is it?
I agree that it is an ugly city and people are a bit cold. But it is still possible to make friends. I made quite a few friends in Toronto, but almost of us are Chinese. That makes no difference to me though, because friends are friends. Unlike some people, I don't specifically want to make "Canadian friends". I find most of them largely boring any way. I deeply deeply dislike people who are reluctant to express their real opinions because they have the habit to be "harmless", which means "boring to me". I love people who engage arguments with me, something Canadians try all means to avoid because they want to appear "nice". I think Canadians really need to change that. I am in France right now, and they tend to criticize and argue about everything, and I love it. For Canadians, it is always like "the weather was great this weekend" with their fake polite smile, yeah, I know you are incredibly boring and want to be liked, but shut up.
As to wonderland, why would anyone assume Canada/Toronto is one? We should have such stupid ideas. One would think Stockholm or Zurich are fantastic places, but I can guarantee they suck in many aspects too without ever going there. We are adults. Don't have this unrealistic expectation about any place. I think it is the mistake being made here.
In general I'd say Toronto is not a bad place to live. Yes, it is ugly and North American style boring (with 95% dead suburban life and suburban folks with their big garages, Costco bags and Caribbeans winter vacation plans), but at least comparing with many American cities it is a good option (the idea of living in cities like Los Angeles or Houston frightens me).
You ask why anyone would assume Toronto is a wonderland. Good question. I think it has to do with this image many Americans have of Canada, and Toronto in particular. Because we're frustrated with all the horrific things going on in the US, we (those of us in this category, anyway) project an image of Canada and Toronto of a sort of Utopia compared to the US. I think it's an escape fantasy; grass is much greener thing. It's stupid to do so, obviously. Both because 1) no place is Utopia, and because 2) life is very tough in Toronto.
Please don't equate friendship with that characteristic phoniness of open faced needing to know everything about you and your personal life.
All this nonsense about making friends in Toronto being difficult just highlights the fact the "today" crowd are focused almost entirely on instant gratification and know nothing of actual friendship versus phony superficial Facebook crappola.
People willing to share their most intimate life details with you in no way constitutes friendship and more's the pity today's younger set cannot grasp that.
Friendships are not supposed to be easy or quick. They're supposed to be time consuming, take effort and worthy of a lot of patience.
I'm not sure why you think you're God's authority on what friendship means, but to many, many people, Toronto is a very hard place to make new good friends.
I'm not sure why you think you're God's authority on what friendship means, but to many, many people, Toronto is a very hard place to make new good friends.
Probably the same "authorities" who have defined the values of friendship since the beginning of time. God of course, having nothing whatsoever to do with it. It's called life experience.
It's not supposed to be easy. What about that "something worthwhile" concept you and the "many, many" not understand? Just another testament to the lazy aspect of today's younger set.
You're not looking for friendship; you're looking for a Chatty Cathy doll.
Probably the same "authorities" who have defined the values of friendship since the beginning of time. God of course, having nothing whatsoever to do with it. It's called life experience.
It's not supposed to be easy. What about that "something worthwhile" concept you and the "many, many" not understand? Just another testament to the lazy aspect of today's younger set.
You're not looking for friendship; you're looking for a Chatty Cathy doll.
I have not doubt Toronto scores low on the "open" interaction scale but that is not to suggest you cannot make "friends". Social activities are available aplenty in the big smoke and those are the traditional methods of finding people with common interests.
I get the feeling some on here would prefer the simplicity of people walking around with a sign on their forehead stating "Open for Business". I cannot help but feel if it were that easy, it wouldn't be worth anything.
I think what's hard to grasp is the hustle bustle of large city living putting people at odds with an open demeanour. Toronto being the largest of Canadian cities would lend itself to the cool and aloof descriptor. I avoid Toronto like I would avoid interacting with a rabid wolf.
Riding subways and buses gets you used to not wanting to interact with the person sitting right next to you and that carries over to the rest of your daily activities. Walking past literally thousands of strangers every single day just going to work gets you into the mode of not even making eye contact. I detest all city living.
I think it would be hard to flip that switch during valuable social interaction times. I've lived in Montreal, Toronto and Victoria B.C. and you can probably guess which is the only one of those cities I'd set foot in for any length of time willingly now. Admittedly my age would have a great bearing on that decision but I've felt the same for the last 30 years or so.
As dinosaurs, we prefer less cluttered and quieter spaces to roam in now.
Wow, you really hate urban living. I live in NYC and can tell you that none of the things you said are true. Riding the subway does not make you a less social person. I've made more friends in NYC than I have anywhere else. I couldn't imagine not living in a city...I have all my life, in multiple places. No problems here!
Not just me, research show that most people tend to like others who have different views. There is nothing wrong about arguing as long as it is intellectual and based on facts (not prejudice or petty bickering). Yet my observations is that in real life, most Canadians avoid expressing strong opinions or any disagreements. If I say something they don't agree with, they simply keep silent, and only speak when they agree. Gosh, these people are incredibly boring.
Semantics. I would enjoy a good intellectual debate wherein my opinions are both considered and challenged.
However, any attempt at such debate reveals that "the facts" are up in the air to most. So why bother.
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