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Sorry, having a reception after a fake wedding is so tacky it is laughable. They couldn't have a party after their actual wedding?
And of course you CAN celebrate without alcohol. Not everyone would prefer to though, and that is the point. Isn't a party about the guests, not the hosts?
In my circles, an alcohol ban at a traditional wedding reception would be seen as cheap and selfishly Bridezilla-ish, unless there was an obvious religious circumstance. At least invite guests to BYOB and supply mixers.
I have been to one alcohol free reception that made sense--it took place in the church hall immediately after a morning wedding and there was cake, coffee and punch. It lasted about an hour and everyone's expectations were met. The guests then went off a bar for brunch and to continue the celebration informally.
In my circles, judging people on the tackiness of their wedding plans without knowing any of the circumstances is laughable.
Very happy I don't mix with your 'circles'. They sound like a bunch of judgemental dbags.
I wonder what my friends and family would have said if we told them we couldn't have our wedding because it might be considered tacky. Bwahahahahaha. What a joke.
In all fairness, the OP asked our opinion on a wedding with out booze - so I think everyone is justified in voicing our opinion on whether or not we would be happy as a guest at such an event. Some people think it's a good idea - some think it's boring and lame - but most said they would go. I think these are all valid opinions. My friend got married and didn't serve meet at the wedding because she doesn't eat meat. She was very adamant about that. She asked what I though and I said that some people would be disappointed but at the end of the day, it was her wedding and she could do what she wanted to. A little while after the wedding - she said that she wished she had served meat.
It is their wedding. They can do what they want (like get married way too young). Some of the guests will probably not mind that there is no alcohol. Some of the guests will.
Oh - in terms of the "fake" wedding - I have two couple friends that got married before their actual wedding - one was for health insurance purposes and the other was because they wanted to get officially married in a state where gay marriage was legal but have the ceremony and party close to friends and family.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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Originally Posted by Dewdrop93
In all fairness, the OP asked our opinion on a wedding with out booze - so I think everyone is justified in voicing our opinion on whether or not we would be happy as a guest at such an event. Some people think it's a good idea - some think it's boring and lame - but most said they would go. I think these are all valid opinions. My friend got married and didn't serve meet at the wedding because she doesn't eat meat. She was very adamant about that. She asked what I though and I said that some people would be disappointed but at the end of the day, it was her wedding and she could do what she wanted to. A little while after the wedding - she said that she wished she had served meat.
It is their wedding. They can do what they want (like get married way too young). Some of the guests will probably not mind that there is no alcohol. Some of the guests will.
I think meat is a different story. A vegetarian would appreciate being offered something for vegetarians as a guest, same with meat eaters. But alcohol, it's not a main staple. Or if it is and they can't go without alcohol for two hours, maybe they should be admitted to the hospital and put on an alcohol drip.
They haven't been married for 7 months. They got engaged 7 weeks ago and got married at the courthouse two days ago.
Right, the wedding is seven months AFTER the wedding, this coming July. It is a fake wedding being conducted for a married couple. I can see postponing a reception for a few weeks for a couple married in a situation where friends and family could not be present... but performing a second marriage ceremony? Crazy.
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A friend of mine and her boyfriend got engaged roughly 7 weeks ago and they got married yesterday at the courthouse. But, the "official" wedding will take place next July. However, they're considering not serving alcohol at their wedding reception.
And this says it all:
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The wedding and reception are all about the bride and groom, that's the point of the day! You are a guest at it, so you eat and drink what is served to you, like it or not.
And I don't know how you people were raised, but the reception is a party for the guests who have come to celebrate the wedding. It is hosted by the family or by the bride and groom. Look up the meaning and customs surrounding the idea of host vs guest and you might see where I am coming from.
Have attitudes really changed that much? I think this is why we have so much controversy and reality shows focused on horrifyingly selfish behaviours around wedding planning. People have lost sight of the true meaning of hospitality and celebrations.
Oh - in terms of the "fake" wedding - I have two couple friends that got married before their actual wedding - one was for health insurance purposes and the other was because they wanted to get officially married in a state where gay marriage was legal but have the ceremony and party close to friends and family.
Both of which seem like reasonable, non tacky reasons to me.
Or you know, if one of you is foreign and you actually want to be able to be together instead of trapped in different countries.
But perhaps having said vows means you should forgo an actual wedding with friends and family present. Who knew!
I wonder what my friends and family would have said if we told them we couldn't have our wedding because it might be considered tacky. Bwahahahahaha. What a joke.
I personally HATE going to weddings. They are painfully boring and annoying. I'd rank getting teeth drilled and a pap smear (at the same time) above attending a wedding reception. I'm more likely to stop by the church for the actual wedding to pay my respects, and blow-off the reception. Most catered food, even at really good caterers, is mediocre at best, so the dinner never thrills me. The best foods I've ever had at weddings were from the hors d'oeuvres trays that come zooming by when you're waiting for the wedding party to show up, and they're taking forever getting their pictures taken.
So the only saving factor to me is free alcohol.
Sometimes you're going to a wedding for someone you love and are close to, but most of the time it's someone you marginally know (some co-worker's kid, a friend of a friend, etc), so it's not about "caring about the couple" to me. It's about enduring an annoying celebration, and having the opportunity to have a few drinks to make it mildly tolerable.
If I have to watch uncomfortably-dressed people do the chicken dance, the macarena, and the electric slide, I'd better have alcohol in me.
So of course it's fine for a couple to choose to do whatever they want, but it's also our choice as potential guests to decline the invitation. Hell, it saves them money and they still get a gift (a check) from me anyway, so they make out pretty well.
Both of which seem like reasonable, non tacky reasons to me.
Or you know, if one of you is foreign and you actually want to be able to be together instead of trapped in different countries.
But perhaps having said vows means you should forgo an actual wedding with friends and family present. Who knew!
I think the usual approach is to have a legal marriage ceremony followed by a church blessing and reception. Nothing wrong with that. But two official marriage ceremonies just seems sort of deep-down wrong to me, both from a religious and legal perspective. Maybe it's not, I think I should accept that this is my own personal quirk. Sorry folks for taking this off track. Back to arguing about booze and stuff...
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