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Clarissaarcos - Let me re-orient your thinking a bit.
--- NOTHING replaces you checking out/experiencing locations for yourself. You should try to narrow it down to 2 or 3 towns in at least a one week visit. And plan that trip in detail so you can check/verify as much as you need while here. You will go crazy and feel too uninformed if you try to spread yourself too thin across too many towns.
--- I would think that the schools and business opportunities would be at the top of your list, right? In Western NC, it's quite quick and easy to get into the woods or deep country for recreational activity so verifying the quality of how your kids will get educated and how you/hubby will make a living should be high on your TO DO list.
--- I think you can accomplish all of the lifestyle stuff here so I would focus heavily on the things just above. Stick with your first idea which was Black Mountain. And 2 nearby towns that make sense are Weaverville and Hendersonville. All of those are near enough to population to make a living but also have some wide, open spaces and lots of outdoorsy activities. (not sure about 20 acres availability or the pricing but, you can check that online).
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