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How "nice"/cheerful should employees be to one another when their work requires them to be in CONSTANT contact with one another (i.e. they are in a team, so working together most of the day)? What is the expectation? I work with someone in this type of setting and she barely responds (or responds in a purposefully forced manner) when I say good morning. This is her attitude the entire day. I notice that she will purposely turn up the ice (without specifically saying anything rude) on anyone she doesn't like in hopes they will not talk to her (even though our work requires communication). She will act like you're irritating her by asking her about something that is essential to the job. She will be like that to one person and 5 min later will turn around and laugh about something else with another co-worker (so it's not like she's just depressed--although I was initially wondering if that was it). It has gotten to the point where I am starting to think twice before I ask her anything, however I need to (that's why she was hired). We do not usually have clients around when this is happening, but sometimes she will need to help me with something (this is part of her job) with a client and she will just be glum and silent. I am trying to stay normal with her since this is the workplace, but it's a rotten situation.
I am friendly towards a couple of people at my job and go out of my way to have conversations with them- my boss (for obvious reasons) and another co-worker that I like. The others I only discuss work with.
Then there is one loudmouthed, obnoxious, sarcastic douchebag who sits in the cube next to me who I ignore regardless of what he is talking about. He never shuts up, but I don't respond to him so it makes him look like a moron.
I could understand ignoring people you don't really have to deal with, but what about people that your job requires you to work with collaboratively? I no longer try to have conversations with this lady, just talk about the things needed for our job (like "where is such and such office item" that she has and we need).
I've seen this type of behavior in every office I've ever worked in (and in 30 years there have been plenty!) There are personality conflicts, and there will be co-workers who just don't like you for some reason. I once had an office mate who was really hostile to me because I went to the gym after work. I was in my late 30's then. She called me a "floozy" and said that women my age who worked out like that only did it to attract men. She said she "let nature take its course" and was very pear shaped, with a large "secretary spread". As I got thinner and more ripped, it got worse and worse. The tension got so bad that it was written up in our supervision reports and it reflected poorly on her, because I really hadn't "done" anything. Just be polite and pleasant. They are your co-workers, they don't have to be your friends.
Last edited by Mrs. Skeffington; 03-08-2012 at 12:39 AM..
I am friendly towards a couple of people at my job and go out of my way to have conversations with them- my boss (for obvious reasons) and another co-worker that I like. The others I only discuss work with.
Then there is one loudmouthed, obnoxious, sarcastic douchebag who sits in the cube next to me who I ignore regardless of what he is talking about. He never shuts up, but I don't respond to him so it makes him look like a moron.
Wow I hope you didn't wind up with the guy who used to sit next to me! Sounds just like him. I feel your pain.
I could understand ignoring people you don't really have to deal with, but what about people that your job requires you to work with collaboratively? I no longer try to have conversations with this lady, just talk about the things needed for our job (like "where is such and such office item" that she has and we need).
Sounds like you've got it figured out 55degrees...just talk when you have to....some people are just like that...maybe she hates her job...maybe she's got problems at home....could be any number of reasons to explain her poor behaviour....just don't let it bother you.
I supposed you could email her if that makes sense in the particular sitation. Or IM, if that is used at your office.
My last office was very quiet because the workers are IMing instead of talking for quick office Q and A from person to person. We even used IM for people that sat in the nearby cubicles.
i am usually pretty aloof and unsociable. its nothing personal and i dont always pick up on cues from others unless i'm making a conscious effort. maybe she feels more comfortable around employees she has known longer.
i am usually pretty aloof and unsociable. its nothing personal and i dont always pick up on cues from others unless i'm making a conscious effort. maybe she feels more comfortable around employees she has known longer.
I've gotten in trouble in "sensitivity training" for pointing out that not everyone is happy go lucky and wants to hold hands singing kumbayah at work. I presented the viewpoint that some folks would just as soon not blather meaninglessly about the events of the weekend, your damn kids, etc. Of course, they looked at me like I am some kind of maniac.
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