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You mentioned that people close to you already know the situation so I am going to assume that everyone already knows the situation and if that is the situation it would be odd for you to continue to wear the wedding ring. On the other hand, I don't know the culture and politics as well as what part of the country you are from. Some places are more conservative than others. I am recently married but when I was single everyone thought I was on the look out for guys and older women felt sorry for me while young people with children thought I had all the time in the world and no responsibility.
I will go on the other side of the argument. I think you should not make any waves or cause any attention to be focused on you for the time being. Sure, we all say these things shouldn't affect any hiring or promotion decisions, but this is the real world and those things do go on.
Fly under the radar for now, it is a personal matter, so keep it to yourself and after you get the promotion you can stop wearing the ring. Chances are, it wouldn't make any difference, but why take the chance...........and frankly it is no one's business anyway.
I doubt anyone that doesn't work daily with you looks to see whether you are wearing a ring or not. And some married people don't even wear rings. However, you estranged spouse has a very good point.
You never know what someone up high is thinking if they find out. Maybe they think you will move to a different location or will suddenly have child care issues because one less parent to watch the kids. They don't know if you have kids or not. Or maybe they think you'll meet someone new and move away or stop working (especially the ones of the old fashioned mindset about women).
A ring is pretty minor. However, something like a name change would be very, very obvious and would draw attention to your situation. I assume you aren't changing your name since that was not brought up.
Thanks for the responses everyone. Though I still don't know which way to lean, it helps seeing different perspectives.
The sign of instability and/or me being less focused due to home distractions is a concern. That being said, I do see the point of me being more focused on work (I always have been, but this is now be even more of a priority). I also don't want everything I do to be under a microscope.
Regarding kids-- there's none, thank god. Never changed my last name, so don't need to worry about that either. It's literally just the ring! He's moved across the country anyways, so no one will be seeing him around.
Another thought was to wear another ring on that finger just at work. Not the wedding/ engagement ring, but another piece of jewelry. I often wear right hand rings anyways, so just switch that over to the left.
I feel like I am overthinking this, but I just don't want to put myself at a disadvantage. I realize no one knows what the ultimate outcome will be, but thought I'd get other thoughts beyond my soon to be ex.
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Yes, but where?
