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Gee, I thought this topic was supposed to not rehash the age old "childfree vs. parents in the workplace" debate. Yet (shocking!) somehow the topic has devolved into that debate.
I'm a working parent. My kids will always come first. At the same time, I do value my job. It's called "give and take". I "give" when I need to and "take" when I need to. I will take time off for my kids' first day of school. That's my tradition and it works for everyone here. My husband, who has a more flexible schedule and is closer to the school than I am, takes care of other things like taking care of a sick child, school functions, etc. That's the "take". When I'm in trial mode, I often work 14 hour days for several days, for weeks on end. I work at least one day of the weekend. And I do it with no complaint because that's the nature of the beast. That's the "give".
Like I said, it's "I scratch your back, you scratch mine". I thank goodness that I don't have to really ask for time off and be put on some sort of priority list. At our firm, we take time off if we have the PTO. We take time off if we don't have PTO too - but that's unpaid and after a day or two of that, it'll hurt big time.
I think that, in part referencing the article, it would be interesting to compare the workplace culture / policies of the high density family-unfriendly blue areas such as the Bay area, Boston, etc to the high growth areas such as Raleigh-Durham, Dallas-Ft Worth, Atlanta, etc.
There's no need to be sassy. I was very respectful of parents in my post. I'm a woman by the way. My sister is a single parent. I see the struggle. I'm not bashing parents.
Speaking of bills and extra jobs- I have major bills I'm trying to pay. Things like student loans and my tires are screwed etc etc .
There's no need for rage post. Braces are expensive but they are a cost you should expect when you have growing children. Just like I expect to pay for a full set of tires ( due to owning a car) or paying back my college expenses (due to attending college) = we all have responsibilities, my responsibilities may not be raising a child but they are also important and expensive in the sense of time and money.
The OP, me is a woman. And I'm 25 by the way, not 22. Is there something in my profile that said I was 22? If not you are crazy.
You have really turned this thread into something is was not intended to be, a rage debate of stupidity. When did I ever say I was a man?
Never did I bash you are make assumptions about you. I asked a question about a topic. Clearly, you can't answer a question like you have some education or common sense.
Let me fill you in about myself since you already seem to know so much about me. I'm a 25 year old woman born to single parent working in the IT Field. My mom is a nurse. Nurses don't get holidays like most people do. My sister and I had to fend for ourselves. There was no babysitter, mom couldn't afford it. So stop, your rage filled woe is me crap right there. Stop it and then walk your self to the plank and jump.
I work with a majority of married men with children. My co workers are great men and I like working for my company. Regardless, there have been a number of times where I was next in line for something as far as seniority but was told it would go to John Doe because he has a wife and child to support. This is plain wrong. I understand give and take. But I've the one always giving at my job to the parents who are co workers.. I have 4 tires to replace asap but I get off at 6:30 pm. What decent shop is gonna replace my tires this late? If I had gotten the earlier shift like I was supposed to I could get my tires replaced without having to take out of my PTO which my male co workers never seems to do when I cover for them. Now I have to ride on a nail in my tire till tomorrow. There needs to be a balance.
Last edited by Avangeliz; 07-08-2016 at 10:47 AM..
The OP, me is a woman. And I'm 25 by the way, not 22. Is there something in my profile that said I was 22? If not you are crazy. You sound like a crazy overworked parent and I feel sorry for you. You have more bias than I ever could.
You have really turned this thread into something is was not intended to be, a rage debate of stupidity. When did I ever say I was a man? Even so what does that have to do with perks in the office?
Never did I bash you are make assumptions about you. I asked a question about a topic. Clearly, you can't answer a question like you have some education or sense.
Let me fill you in about myself since you already seem to know so much about me. I'm a 25 year old woman born to single parent working in the IT Field. I work with a majority of married men with children. My co workers are great men and I like working for my company. Regardless, there have been a number of times where I was next in line for something as far as seniority but was told it would go to John Doe because he has a wife and child to support. This is plain wrong. I understand give and take. But I've the one always giving at my job. I have 4 tires to replace asap but I get off at 6:30 pm. What shop is gonna replace my tires this late? If I had gotten the earlier shift like I was supposed to I could get my tires replaced without having to take out of my PTO which my male co workers never seems to do when I cover for them. Now I have to ride on a nail in my tire till tomorrow. There needs to be a balance.
I call BS. No manager is ever going to say out loud that someone got a promotion because they have a family to support. If that really happened, take it to hr or file a complaint with the labor dept.
I call BS. No manager is ever going to say out loud that someone got a promotion because they have a family to support. If that really happened, take it to hr or file a complaint with the labor dept.
Why would I lie about that? I was next in line for the earlier shift that opened up and I was told it was mine at first only to be told a week later that they are giving the shift to "John Doe" because he has a second job and needs to be able to work both to support his wife and kids.
Regardless, the fact that I even need to be that detailed in a follow up post just proves that people can be blind to this happening. There needs to be a balance of give and take. This is not parent bashing or chidless bashing. There just needs to be a balance.
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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I'll take your word for it, and it would indeed be unfair, but certainly not illegal nor would it meet the definition of discrimination, since childless employees are not a protected class. I have never seen or heard of that before and it seems like only an incompetent manager would admit to that, and I would suggest looking for a new job if they operate that way.
By the way, Costco and Sam's Club tire shops are open until 8:30pm, some Firestone stores are open until 7pm.
So if what you are saying is accurate, then speak up against it. Say that it's not fair that seniority is supposed to control who gets a shift and you have seniority. Say it's not fair that you have personal obligations you need to attend to during work hours, even if they aren't related to being a parent, so you expect similar flexibility.
Don't just be a pushover complaining here where it's not going to change anything.
All parents were once non-parents and I'm guessing that most of them aren't going to say it's not fair to allow flexibility for all employees.
But that's not the point of this thread. The point of this post was to see how things are in the office for other chidless people. I never once complained till it was assumed that I'm a man and hence if I'm a man I have no respect for parents.
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