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I guess I'm typing this for therapeutic reasons, because I'm dealing with a great deal of mental stress at the moment. I'm going to give a time line of events and a brief description of why I'm feeling the way I'm feeling.
Last year, I started with a new company after spending eight months in a role that was not a very good fit for my skill set and experience. The new position seemed like it would be a much better fit for me.
One month into the new role, they cleaned house and let a handful of directors and managers go. My manager was one of those people.
For two months, we didn't have a manager. I had little to no guidance, and most of what was handed off to me was menial administrative duties which fall well below my analyst pay grade.
Two and a half months after the "great purge", we have a new director and manager. They spend little to no time understanding our roles, and instead focus on other projects while leaving us on our own.
I take this as an opportunity to set up one-on-one meetings with my director and try to mold my position into what I wish to be doing. He seems on board, but doesn't really lay out a plan for me.
Months go by and still no direction from either director or manager. They're so hands off, that they don't even show up to our team meetings to discuss what's going on with us. I start applying for other jobs internally and seek tasks and projects from other departments.
I am asked to interview for what seems like a great position in another department. I interview, it goes well, and it seems like I am the top candidate for the role.
My manager catches wind that I am interviewing for the other position, and essentially goes behind my back to the other manager and to the CEO to let the know that they are working to redefine my role so that it better suits me. He sends me an email between he and the CEO that outlines the discussion they had.
Weeks go by and no word about the other position. Eventually, I discover that they hired another person for the job outside the company.
The manager from the other department eventually gets in touch with me several weeks after I interviewed for the position and basically tells me what I suspected. They were told by my manager that my role would be changing and so they decided to keep interviewing other candidates.
I just hit my one year mark earlier this week and nothing has officially changed with my position. Furthermore, there has been zero communication about any pending changes from management.
Essentially, I have very little to do outside the basic admin tasks that I mentioned further up in the post. I'm severely bored most of the time, and so I spend my downtime learning new skills or taking walks or reading or listening to podcasts. I have tried working with other departments to find things to do, but nothing substantial has come of it. The boredom is turning into anxiety and ultimately depression.
I have tried applying for jobs outside the company, but I'm getting zero call backs. I'm concerned that having two relatively short term jobs (this one and the one before it) on my resume may make me look like an unreliable job hopper, so hiring managers are dismissing my resume automatically. I have a college degree and nearly a decade of post college experience at this point, and I feel like it was much easier getting interviews earlier on in my career than it is now.
I don't know what to do. I'm bored, anxious, and becoming depressed because I feel like I'm worthless to this employer, and worthless to other companies who don't call me for an interview. It's gotten so bad that I fantasize about walking into my director's office and quitting, selling my condo, and moving to another location altogether.
Location: In a city within a state where politicians come to get their PHDs in Corruption
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You need to stop pressing. Whether you're pressing at a blackjack table or work, it never turns out well. Relax, take a vacation, don't do more at work than your menial job at this moment requires you to do. Once your head is in better place, then it's time to game plan, not now. Any plan or action you take right now will be out of frustration.
You need to stop pressing. Whether you're pressing at a blackjack table or work, it never turns out well. Relax, take a vacation, don't do more at work than your menial job at this moment requires you to do. Once your head is in better place, then it's time to game plan, not now. Any plan or action you take right now will be out of frustration.
I absolutely agree with you regarding the pressing. I haven't brought the subject up to anybody at work since it was originally discussed.
As for the game plan, that's where I'm at a loss. I'm not able to move internally it seems, and I'm having a difficult time getting interviews elsewhere. I just feel trapped.
Location: In a city within a state where politicians come to get their PHDs in Corruption
2,907 posts, read 2,069,650 times
Reputation: 4478
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thom Hanks
I absolutely agree with you regarding the pressing. I haven't brought the subject up to anybody at work since it was originally discussed.
As for the game plan, that's where I'm at a loss. I'm not able to move internally it seems, and I'm having a difficult time getting interviews elsewhere. I just feel trapped.
Your brain is trapped. You're stuck in this rigid thinking that is preventing you from seeing other opportunities. Find a way to relax, and focus your attention on positive things rather than negative. You're anxious, you're probably unhappy--with yourself mostly, and it most likely shows in everything you do.
Stop planning, stop worrying about your current place, and accept it for what it is. Once you do, opportunities will come, often from the most unexpected places.
Your brain is trapped. You're stuck in this rigid thinking that is preventing you from seeing other opportunities. Find a way to relax, and focus your attention on positive things rather than negative. You're anxious, you're probably unhappy--with yourself mostly, and it most likely shows in everything you do.
Stop planning, stop worrying about your current place, and accept it for what it is. Once you do, opportunities will come, often from the most unexpected places.
I appreciate your insights. I agree that this is a mental obstacle first and foremost. I have suffered from anxiety in the past, and it does tend to cloud your mind and perpetuate itself by way of negative-think.
I'm gonna try to relax this weekend and clear my mind. Hopefully something will give sooner than later.
Have a nice weekend!
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