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Yes, I know that must sound nuts in this economy, but I am thinking about doing it, because my hubby got transferred and I am going nuts without him. It's been several months and I still haven't found a job in the new city (we need both incomes to pay the bills). So should I quit my stable 15-year plus job and pound the pavement of the new city (which has a terrible job market; it's in Fla.)? I don't know what's worse: doing that, or continuing to support two households, going through massive mental and relationship strain, etc. Has anyone ever done this? Gone through this? I am at my wit's end.
How much do you love your job? Sounds like you would rather be with your husband then be without him and keep the job. Sounds like you have already made your decision. He is already supporting the household in his new locale so second income isnt necessarily needed to do so. Move and hit the road and get a job. Even in tough times the cream of the crop make it happen.
We already sold our house a long time ago, so no, we don't have a house to sell. I am renting and hubby is staying with my cousin for a small rent. We would not even be making this move if we had a house to sell! I guess the question is: what is worse, being away from hubby in a job and city i hate just to pay the bills? or moving to the new city with hubby and being jobless for who knows how long and not knowing what that would do to our marriage???
Yes, I know that must sound nuts in this economy, but I am thinking about doing it, because my hubby got transferred and I am going nuts without him. It's been several months and I still haven't found a job in the new city (we need both incomes to pay the bills). So should I quit my stable 15-year plus job and pound the pavement of the new city (which has a terrible job market; it's in Fla.)? I don't know what's worse: doing that, or continuing to support two households, going through massive mental and relationship strain, etc. Has anyone ever done this? Gone through this? I am at my wit's end.
Anyone who quits a job and doesn';t have another one needs therapy. That's a medicated decision in my opinion.
Location: Jonquil City (aka Smyrna) Georgia- by Atlanta
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glacierfan
Yes, I know that must sound nuts in this economy, but I am thinking about doing it, because my hubby got transferred and I am going nuts without him. It's been several months and I still haven't found a job in the new city (we need both incomes to pay the bills). So should I quit my stable 15-year plus job and pound the pavement of the new city (which has a terrible job market; it's in Fla.)? I don't know what's worse: doing that, or continuing to support two households, going through massive mental and relationship strain, etc. Has anyone ever done this? Gone through this? I am at my wit's end.
Not a good idea. Not now. Wait till things get better.
I know someone who is in a similar situation. Her husband lives about 800 miles away because of a transfer. She works in the school system and she's about 5 years from retirement. She's going to stay in her school for the next five years. She visits him during shcool breaks. He travels to see her sometimes too. It's a hard choice that only you can make. Best of luck to you.
Unless you have a skill/profession that is still in demand, such as nursing, they you need to decide if you will be happy with your husband, but with creditors calling every minute of the day, and debt piling up with no end in sight.
Separation is no fun, but it neither is sinking further and further into debt. Military couples are separated for 18 months or longer, and they get through it.
Don't put more on the table than you can stand to loose.
I did it two weeks ago. After getting laid off and drawing unemployment for about 5 months I accepted a production tech job with a pharmaceutical maker (Merck) in early January. I had applied in October. The job description was very vague and I had little familiarity with the process, plus they tell you very little about the actual job and equipment at the interview, but it went well and I passed their little hands-on test. Went to a 3-day training seminar in aseptic techniques. Started having my doubts then. When I finally got to see what my job was going to be and what I was assigned to work on I realized it wasn't for me. But it took over three weeks to get any clue about the real job. One morning it just hit me that I couldn't stay and I quit.
Luckily, I live in an area that is taking the recession a little better than others. Plus, I have some reimbursment money coming in for education expenses from the employer who laid me off. So I guess if you have marketable skills that are still in demand and you have a financial cushion you can do it. I'm lucky in that respect I guess.
Some couples can handle "separation due to job" situation while others can not and will not (like us). For my wife's last job, she had to go to Michigan three different times for training (each time for almost 2 weeks). We thought about it, and since I wasn't working anyway, we decided that I would go with her each time. Lucky for both of us, I wasn't working and was able to go with her. We are an older (60 yrs old) couple that just likes being "together"! The only times we have actually been away from each other all night was during two surgeries/stays in hospital (one me, one her).
For some couples, marriage and being together is more important than any job or the economy!
So, if you want to quit your job so you can be with your hubby, DO IT! If you do "quit and move", just make sure you make things "happen" to get a job/keep your marriage together. On the other hand, if you can handle your situation (being away from him for extended times), stay where you are at and figure something out.
You know times are tough when it's easier to find a job in a small one horse town in the Midwest, than it is in a big metropolitan area like Sacramento! I read an article that said Iowa had the lowest unemployment rate and California had the highest. I think we are going to witness a big surge of families relocating to more "undesirable" states out of necessity. My brother in law graduated college with a Forestry Degree almost a year ago. He's been looking for a job in his field for quite some time now, but is working doing something else in the meantime. He says the only states with job openings right now are South Dakota, Wisconsin, and Delaware. That's it. Montana had an opening but they said they got hundreds off applications the very first week the opening was posted. So, slim pickings on jobs right now even for people with a degree. My brother in law is actually thinking of going up to South Dakota for an interview. He's in Arizona right now. Desperate times call for desperate measures I guess. Although some people like South Dakota, I'm sure it's pretty, but...
Some couples can handle "separation due to job" situation while others can not and will not (like us). For my wife's last job, she had to go to Michigan three different times for training (each time for almost 2 weeks). We thought about it, and since I wasn't working anyway, we decided that I would go with her each time. Lucky for both of us, I wasn't working and was able to go with her. We are an older (60 yrs old) couple that just likes being "together"! The only times we have actually been away from each other all night was during two surgeries/stays in hospital (one me, one her).
For some couples, marriage and being together is more important than any job or the economy!
So, if you want to quit your job so you can be with your hubby, DO IT! If you do "quit and move", just make sure you make things "happen" to get a job/keep your marriage together. On the other hand, if you can handle your situation (being away from him for extended times), stay where you are at and figure something out.
This is SO true. My husband and I moved away from where we were living so that I could work days and we could spend time together. Had we stayed where we were, I would have worked nights and he would have worked days. It wasn't worth it for us. We would not separate from each other, even if it made times tough, because together we are a stronger force and apart, everything would be tougher. It is really something that you have to decide for you. Deep down inside, you probably know what you need to do, and the scary part is just listening and doing it! Good luck, and keep us posted!
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Right on the money!
