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Old 04-04-2010, 01:01 PM
 
Location: Mississippi
845 posts, read 1,216,257 times
Reputation: 701

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Anyone have any ideas on how best to deal with them?

We have one in our office who constantly asks "Where is so and so, when are they coming back, what are they doing, etc" and we think the boss put him up to watching us all and reporting back. He has been in hot water with a couple fellow employees for snitching in the past. Everyone recognizes it. He is not a boss, and has the same status we do. My other co-workers and I have had numerous conversations about him over the 3 weeks this has been happening. It has become blatently obvious the past 3 weeks, instead of the covert manner in which he used to do it. That is why we think the boss put him up to it.

He has been pushing to get me on Saturday duty for the past year or so as well. If he didn't bring up working Saturdays I may not have confronted him, it just set me off.

Here is how the conversation went:

Johnny: When are you going to volunteer for Saturday duty?

Me: I'm not. You know we are adopting, and my wife works weekends, so someone has to keep the kids, so if you are pushing for me to work weekends you can stop now. It's not happening.

And Johnny, one more thing, I have noticed you asking what, when, and where about everyone for the past 3 weeks. You don't need to worry about what i'm doing because i'm only gonna take so much of that ****.

Johnny: Okkkaaay...

This happened Friday, so I may be called to the office Monday, but I was fed up. Give me your stories, opinions, and advice. Thanks.

Last edited by jhadorn; 04-04-2010 at 01:19 PM..
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Old 04-04-2010, 01:29 PM
 
Location: Southern California
3,116 posts, read 4,000,241 times
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Well, first, if your boss did indeed ask him to watch and report back, then it's part of his job duties now.

Second, if you're doing everything you should be then a "snitch" or a "tattle-tail" will have no power over you.

And third, it sounds like you really over-reacted to a simple question, based on the little scenario you posted above. If it was me, I wouldn't do that again!
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Old 04-04-2010, 01:34 PM
 
Location: Mississippi
845 posts, read 1,216,257 times
Reputation: 701
The reason it does bother me is because I do my job and do it well, so I don't need a coworker asking where I am and what i'm doing.

It also shows unprofessionalism for the boss to put a coworker up to doing what a boss should do. If I were the boss and I wanted to know what someone was doing I would ask them.

This guy takes way too much pleasure in minding everyone elses business. If the person in charge won't say anything to him, then I will, and did, take matters into my own hands.

One other thing, he doesn't just snitch. He is the person who twists a story to make himself sound better, and to make you sound worse.
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Old 04-04-2010, 01:51 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
16,759 posts, read 16,251,609 times
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Sounds like you're in education.
Seems like almost all organizations have at least one supervisor who uses this type of management style and there's never a shortage of underlings to do the spying.
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Old 04-04-2010, 01:55 PM
 
1,225 posts, read 1,637,404 times
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I would have told this coworker if he's so worried about Saturday duty, then he can do it.

If you are under to obligation to work weekends then he was out of line.
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Old 04-04-2010, 01:55 PM
 
Location: Mississippi
845 posts, read 1,216,257 times
Reputation: 701
Quote:
Originally Posted by North Beach Person View Post
Sounds like you're in education.
Seems like almost all organizations have at least one supervisor who uses this type of management style and there's never a shortage of underlings to do the spying.
I work in the Engineering/GIS Department of an Non-profit Electric Power Cooperative.
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Old 04-04-2010, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Mississippi
845 posts, read 1,216,257 times
Reputation: 701
Quote:
Originally Posted by swmrbird View Post
I would have told this coworker if he's so worried about Saturday duty, then he can do it.

If you are under to obligation to work weekends then he was out of line.
I am under no obligation to work Saturday, but have no problem working them occasionally if I am needed, providing it is the rare Saturday my wife has off (though I would be sacrificing my day with my wife, which is NOT cool). I cannot be set on a Saturday schedule as we are adopting my wifes neices children internationally, and my wife works weekends. This would be extremely hard on us, not to mention expensive to find someone to keep the children on Saturday. I would NOT get extra pay for the Saturday I work because I am on salary. Johnny DOES get paid for Saturday work as he is on hourly pay.

Johnny does work every 4th Saturday, but he is trying to get me put on Saturday duty so he only has to work every 5th Saturday.
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Old 04-04-2010, 02:04 PM
 
4,806 posts, read 11,890,547 times
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What I don't understand is why you keep feeding him ammunition and gossip.

When he asks when you plan to volunteer, simply tell him, "When I have something to tell you, you'll know." When he asks where someone else is, ask him why he's asking you? You aren't their secretary, it's not your job to know where everyone in the company is. He may be nosy, he may be a gossip, he may be a snitch. But he can only work with what you give him so stop giving anything to him.

It is amazingly easy to still engage in small talk without giving a person like this ammunition. Just turn the conversation back to them. Get him to talk about his volunteer activities. Get him to talk about where he's been.
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Old 04-04-2010, 02:09 PM
 
Location: Mississippi
845 posts, read 1,216,257 times
Reputation: 701
Quote:
Originally Posted by kodaka View Post
What I don't understand is why you keep feeding him ammunition and gossip.

When he asks when you plan to volunteer, simply tell him, "When I have something to tell you, you'll know." When he asks where someone else is, ask him why he's asking you? You aren't their secretary, it's not your job to know where everyone in the company is. He may be nosy, he may be a gossip, he may be a snitch. But he can only work with what you give him so stop giving anything to him.

It is amazingly easy to still engage in small talk without giving a person like this ammunition. Just turn the conversation back to them. Get him to talk about his volunteer activities. Get him to talk about where he's been.
If he asks me where someone is my response is "I don't know". I don't feed him anything. So you want me to do the same thing Johnny does? No thanks.

Show me the part of my post that made you think i'm feeding him information and gossip. Assumption?

Last edited by jhadorn; 04-04-2010 at 02:25 PM..
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Old 04-04-2010, 02:25 PM
 
Location: Southern California
3,116 posts, read 4,000,241 times
Reputation: 3503
I think the point is that you can't do anything about his behavior, especially if your manager has asked him to do it.

The only thing you can do is change your reaction to it.
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