Ellen's Facebook Friends
When I first moved to Yuma, about a year ago, I met this woman named Ellen, a fairly attractive woman maybe a little short of 30 years old. I was going out hiking and I came across Ellen at the trail’s head parking lot. She was angry at herself for forgetting to fill her water bottle. To get water, she thought she was going to have to drive the half mile back down the dirt road, to the main highway, and then travel another couple of miles to the nearest gas station. But I had plenty of water and I told her I would share it. We ended up hiking together. After hiking, we grabbed a bite to eat. Since then, we have hiked together on several occasions and have done lunch a number of times too.
Over the months I learned that Ellen did not have a particularly stable childhood. She didn’t talk about it much, but now and then she would disclose a clue or two. It turned out that her father was in the military and her mother had trouble with alcohol. Ellen moved to a number of different locations growing up, and even lived with relatives for a while. She attended many schools in the process. Ellen finally graduated high school, enrolled in the final high school for all of about three months.
About a year ago Ellen opened a Facebook account. She tried to get some ex high school classmates as Facebook friends but it was not easy. I think that she ended up with forty-some Facebook “friends”. Ellen told me that most of these friends came from the high school where she graduated. She told me that she was close friends with few of them and barely recalled others. But Ellen said that she liked to keep up with what they were doing via Facebook through their photos and posts.
About three weeks ago I had this brilliant idea. I suggested to Ellen that she start a blog and write an entry in it describing her life, then post a link in Facebook. I figured that heck, if I can manage my own blog, anyone can. Ellen was reluctant but I told her that her classmates would get a better understanding of who she is and why they did not know her better. She finally decided to give it a try.
Ellen wrote very eloquently about her early childhood, her teenage years, and finally the challenges of becoming an adult following a tumultuous childhood. I remember that she wrote how she had many childhood friends, but regrettably, very few close friends. She called it My Life So Far and she posted the link to the blog on her Facebook page. The end result was that her blog received 1 “view” while two of her Facebook “friends” unfriended her. Ellen knew that the one “view” was me.
Apparently her posted blog link in Facebook interfered too much with the photos of dinner get-togethers, and new shoes of her Facebook “friends”. My reaction was that I felt very sad for Ellen, and angry at approximately forty nameless, faceless, narcissistic individuals.
Ellen has deleted both her Facebook account and her blog. I have assured her that it is their loss… and believe me, it is. I know, because I am her real friend.
Over the months I learned that Ellen did not have a particularly stable childhood. She didn’t talk about it much, but now and then she would disclose a clue or two. It turned out that her father was in the military and her mother had trouble with alcohol. Ellen moved to a number of different locations growing up, and even lived with relatives for a while. She attended many schools in the process. Ellen finally graduated high school, enrolled in the final high school for all of about three months.
About a year ago Ellen opened a Facebook account. She tried to get some ex high school classmates as Facebook friends but it was not easy. I think that she ended up with forty-some Facebook “friends”. Ellen told me that most of these friends came from the high school where she graduated. She told me that she was close friends with few of them and barely recalled others. But Ellen said that she liked to keep up with what they were doing via Facebook through their photos and posts.
About three weeks ago I had this brilliant idea. I suggested to Ellen that she start a blog and write an entry in it describing her life, then post a link in Facebook. I figured that heck, if I can manage my own blog, anyone can. Ellen was reluctant but I told her that her classmates would get a better understanding of who she is and why they did not know her better. She finally decided to give it a try.
Ellen wrote very eloquently about her early childhood, her teenage years, and finally the challenges of becoming an adult following a tumultuous childhood. I remember that she wrote how she had many childhood friends, but regrettably, very few close friends. She called it My Life So Far and she posted the link to the blog on her Facebook page. The end result was that her blog received 1 “view” while two of her Facebook “friends” unfriended her. Ellen knew that the one “view” was me.
Apparently her posted blog link in Facebook interfered too much with the photos of dinner get-togethers, and new shoes of her Facebook “friends”. My reaction was that I felt very sad for Ellen, and angry at approximately forty nameless, faceless, narcissistic individuals.
Ellen has deleted both her Facebook account and her blog. I have assured her that it is their loss… and believe me, it is. I know, because I am her real friend.
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