My Most Recent Days; an Update
Posted 12-06-2012 at 01:42 PM by KatieGal
As is often the case, I am having trouble with the idea of writing a blog entry about myself without feeling as though I am being self-centered. I would just like to say that if you do not read beyond this very paragraph, I completely understand.
Anyway, I have not gone to work for a full day in about two weeks. I am taking some personal time off but it could come under the title of “Ill Time”. As I’ve said in this blog recently, my anxiety disorder has been causing me trouble. Except for a period when I first became afflicted by the disorder eight years ago, I have always considered it a “mild” anxiety disorder. But it had never been more intense and disabling than it was before I went on a daily anti-anxiety medication two weeks ago.
Taking some time off work has been nice, overall. I must admit that I have at times gotten a little bored, but most of the time I have found something to do, even if that “something” has been utterly unimportant. I have done a lot of Christmas shopping. In fact, I’ve pretty much finished with it. I’ve gotten into cleaning. I have washed windows, scoured out a bathtub, and even sponged the dust off the venetian blinds. I have spent time online also, too much time. I have even managed to waste quite a bit of time at this very website posting my dubious opinions and advice. It's really ironic that my best piece of advice might be "don't listen to me."
Tuesday I went into work and spoke individually with most of my coworkers concerning my anxiety disorder. Psychiatric illnesses carry with them a stigma and I want to show people what one person with such an illness looks like, that person being me. I did the same thing when I was first hired as the facility director almost a year ago. I’d like to think that I make the psychiatric illness appear insignificant and unworthy of a stigma as opposed to the illness making me look like some deviant. I hope I’m right about that.
All this excitement might be coming to an end in the next few days. Earlier today I went to the doctor concerning my disorder, specifically the medication. I told the doctor that though the medication has worked on my anxiety problem, it has also curbed many of my emotions, and I would like to get off of it. I stated that since taking the medication I had not been daydreaming as much, and that things, including the TV show 30 Rock, just did not seem as funny as before.
My doctor was unconvinced that I should wean myself from the medication until I informed her that during intimate moments I “had been unable to reach paradise”. She and I both got a good chuckle out of my impromptu expression and she subsequently agreed that I could carefully wean myself off of the medication with the condition that if the severe anxiety resurfaces I contact her as soon as possible. Apparently sexual gratification is more universally appreciated, and therefore a better selling point than is 30 Rock.
Anyway, I have not gone to work for a full day in about two weeks. I am taking some personal time off but it could come under the title of “Ill Time”. As I’ve said in this blog recently, my anxiety disorder has been causing me trouble. Except for a period when I first became afflicted by the disorder eight years ago, I have always considered it a “mild” anxiety disorder. But it had never been more intense and disabling than it was before I went on a daily anti-anxiety medication two weeks ago.
Taking some time off work has been nice, overall. I must admit that I have at times gotten a little bored, but most of the time I have found something to do, even if that “something” has been utterly unimportant. I have done a lot of Christmas shopping. In fact, I’ve pretty much finished with it. I’ve gotten into cleaning. I have washed windows, scoured out a bathtub, and even sponged the dust off the venetian blinds. I have spent time online also, too much time. I have even managed to waste quite a bit of time at this very website posting my dubious opinions and advice. It's really ironic that my best piece of advice might be "don't listen to me."
Tuesday I went into work and spoke individually with most of my coworkers concerning my anxiety disorder. Psychiatric illnesses carry with them a stigma and I want to show people what one person with such an illness looks like, that person being me. I did the same thing when I was first hired as the facility director almost a year ago. I’d like to think that I make the psychiatric illness appear insignificant and unworthy of a stigma as opposed to the illness making me look like some deviant. I hope I’m right about that.
All this excitement might be coming to an end in the next few days. Earlier today I went to the doctor concerning my disorder, specifically the medication. I told the doctor that though the medication has worked on my anxiety problem, it has also curbed many of my emotions, and I would like to get off of it. I stated that since taking the medication I had not been daydreaming as much, and that things, including the TV show 30 Rock, just did not seem as funny as before.
My doctor was unconvinced that I should wean myself from the medication until I informed her that during intimate moments I “had been unable to reach paradise”. She and I both got a good chuckle out of my impromptu expression and she subsequently agreed that I could carefully wean myself off of the medication with the condition that if the severe anxiety resurfaces I contact her as soon as possible. Apparently sexual gratification is more universally appreciated, and therefore a better selling point than is 30 Rock.
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