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My girlfriend (who is neither American nor Vietnamese) wants me to move to Hanoi with her from the US for her job in a year. Obviously, this is a make-or-break the relationship kind of event, and it has me stressed. For the first time in my life, I like my job and and can see it going somewhere. I like the city that I live in (or at least, I'm pretty comfortable here and could settle down here). The idea of moving to Vietnam is thus a little scary (I've never even been to Asia) but at the same time very alluring; maybe I'm too complacent where I'm at, and Hanoi could be an adventure. I always wanted to live in or visit SE Asia, but that was when I was younger. I'm 30 now (which feels pretty old!).
So I guess what I'm asking is,
Have you, or anyone you know, ever been in a similar situation? What did you do?
How easy is it for Americans to find good work in Vietnam? I currently work in real estate finance for a bank, I'd like to find something in real estate/banking/finance. Is Vietnam one of those countries where they love Westerners, and you can earn a good living?
Anything else you can think of.
I realize this is a pretty vague thread, but this news just got dropped on me and I don't even know how to begin assessing how to decide. Visiting Vietnam is out of the question for awhile, too, due to vacation time and other constraints.
My first suggestion is you try to make the decision based on your relationship and not on the other circumstances. That is, would you follow her anywhere in the world to make this relationship work? Is it worth everything? If so, then find a way to do it.
If not, then I wouldn't even think about moving. I'd consider going long distance, assuming her move is just temporary, but that's tough as well.
To answer your questions if you do decide to go, I think Americans probably have an advantage in the business world there. They certainly do in neighboring Thailand. But real estate finance is probably an ENTIRELY different animal in Vietnam.
What city are you in? (out of curiosity for your work)
And its gonna be a HUGE change if you do go. Lifestyle is quite different from America. Do you have any Asian ethnicity or any sort of connection to Asian culture?
Vietnam in a heartbeat. The only reason to stay in the US is for family/personal life, and your personal life is saying please come to Vietnam and love me. That job you think is so cool? There's dozens more out there that will hire you if you ever return. That city you like? They're not going to put up a wall to keep people out while you're gone. Too old? The dirty little secret is that most people living abroad with jobs worth a damn are older. By getting out soon you are ahead of the game.
I'll level with you. I turned down two chances to finally work overseas outside of a warzone to take my current job mainly in the hopes of finally finding a wife and starting a family. I hate every moment because so far she hasn't appeared. So take my advice with a grain of salt, but once I get a year in at this job I am going to get back with all my old contacts to get back overseas or start my own business because I see no other way to make life in the US as interesting or exciting as life abroad.
My girlfriend (who is neither American nor Vietnamese) wants me to move to Hanoi with her from the US for her job in a year. Obviously, this is a make-or-break the relationship kind of event, and it has me stressed. For the first time in my life, I like my job and and can see it going somewhere. I like the city that I live in (or at least, I'm pretty comfortable here and could settle down here). The idea of moving to Vietnam is thus a little scary (I've never even been to Asia) but at the same time very alluring; maybe I'm too complacent where I'm at, and Hanoi could be an adventure. I always wanted to live in or visit SE Asia, but that was when I was younger. I'm 30 now (which feels pretty old!).
So I guess what I'm asking is,
Have you, or anyone you know, ever been in a similar situation? What did you do?
How easy is it for Americans to find good work in Vietnam? I currently work in real estate finance for a bank, I'd like to find something in real estate/banking/finance. Is Vietnam one of those countries where they love Westerners, and you can earn a good living?
Anything else you can think of.
I realize this is a pretty vague thread, but this news just got dropped on me and I don't even know how to begin assessing how to decide. Visiting Vietnam is out of the question for awhile, too, due to vacation time and other constraints.
My first suggestion is you try to make the decision based on your relationship and not on the other circumstances. That is, would you follow her anywhere in the world to make this relationship work? Is it worth everything? If so, then find a way to do it.
If not, then I wouldn't even think about moving. I'd consider going long distance, assuming her move is just temporary, but that's tough as well.
^ Agree with this completely. OP, do you think your girlfriend is The One? Moving to the other side of the world - not to mention moving there without having visited - is a HUGE move, and requires much soul-searching.
I've been on both sides of the coin. Once I broke up with a boyfriend because his job required him to move overseas to a developing economy. It was not something I was willing to do - the uprooting and developing economy aside, I knew he wasn't the one. Break ups are not pleasant, but in hindsight, it was a great decision. Years later, I got a job offer overseas and had to drop the news to my then 4-month boyfriend. He decided to move with me. To be honest, I'm not sure I would've gone if he didn't want to come along. Anyway, we went, sight unseen, and ended up hating it, so we moved back. I'm so glad he took the chance, though - we had a chance to develop our relationship without the distance, and we're now married.
Good luck to you, no matter which course you choose!
In your position with a good job and prospects on the horizon I would give the subject some very serious thought. SE Asia is nothing like the US and you may not like it when you get there. See this article for some background info on the country which is intended for expats contemplating living there: Living in Vietnam : A Guide to Moving to Vietnam as an Expat : Expat Info Desk
If you can get a few weeks off work, take a vacation there and see what you think. That way, you can go back to your job if the country doesn't come up to scratch.
You will need a visa before you arrive though. See your embassy site here for details: Vietnam
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