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My wife has been on hospice care for 5 months now and not only does Medicare approve, we have no out of pocket expense anymore.
Have the doctors stated they believe they have her mother's pancreatic cancer cured ?
If they can not say so, ask about hospice.
Far too many people apply for hospice on the day before they die.
I completely agree with you, and my question is, how do you bring that up to someone who does not want to give up?
I know there will be no more out-of-pocket with hospice. There is no chance of curing this. The only possible outcomes of having chemo are:
she'll live a few months longer -- maybe
she'll feel more comfortable -- maybe
On the other hand, she might feel worse, but so far she's not markedly worse, and in fact yesterday she walked down the hall with her walker. She was excited about that! Also, we seem to have smoothed out the bumps with the pain meds for the moment.
How and when does one bring up the subject of hospice? Also, what is life like for the patient on hospice? Do they lie in bed all the time? What if they feel like walking with their walker or doing an activity?
My wife is in a wheelchair and uses the walker( with my help ) to go bathroom.
If there is no cure for a terminal disease, why not use hospice ?
My wife hasn't " given up", but we both are realists and don't believe in being fed false hope when no cure is available.
So many cancer patients this is the sequence -----------diagnosed with a serious cancer....fund raiser to help family with huge medical bills....news that they are getting worse......hospice contacted and they die shortly before hospice even completes the paperwork
Many times the start to end is less than 5 months.
My mom fully understands that she has only months to live and that there is no cure. She knows it and tells everyone. I guess my question is, how do you transition someone from traditional care to hospice.
I think of hospice as a sea change. A person definitely crosses some sort of threshold when they make that choice. How did your wife do it? Did she just say to you one day, I'm ready for hospice.
My wife has been on hospice care for 5 months now and not only does Medicare approve, we have no out of pocket expense anymore.
Have the doctors stated they believe they have her mother's pancreatic cancer cured ?
If they can not say so, ask about hospice.
Far too many people apply for hospice on the day before they die.
I think she is talking about a visiting nurse to care for and give meds, not hospice which is totally different. You are right, hospice is different. Yes, we have had many friends using hospice and it is a wonderful thing. My mother in law was on it for about a month before she passed away. I have a good friend who died a couple of months ago who received hospice care for about 2 months.
I completely agree with you, and my question is, how do you bring that up to someone who does not want to give up?
I know there will be no more out-of-pocket with hospice. There is no chance of curing this. The only possible outcomes of having chemo are:
she'll live a few months longer -- maybe
she'll feel more comfortable -- maybe
On the other hand, she might feel worse, but so far she's not markedly worse, and in fact yesterday she walked down the hall with her walker. She was excited about that! Also, we seem to have smoothed out the bumps with the pain meds for the moment.
How and when does one bring up the subject of hospice? Also, what is life like for the patient on hospice? Do they lie in bed all the time? What if they feel like walking with their walker or doing an activity?
Sweepea, what about talking to her doctor? could he help explain to your mom what is going on? As for living as a bed ridden person? absolutely not. My friend that died a few months ago would play bridge with us up until the last week or two. She could joke, walk around, even spent time outside. She was one of those rare people everyone would love to have as a friend. She never really gave up, but toward the end she accepted what was happening. In fact she made the decision to stop chemo. Hospice can be a mind saver for the family as well as the patient.
Sweepea, what about talking to her doctor? could he help explain to your mom what is going on? As for living as a bed ridden person? absolutely not. My friend that died a few months ago would play bridge with us up until the last week or two. She could joke, walk around, even spent time outside. She was one of those rare people everyone would love to have as a friend. She never really gave up, but toward the end she accepted what was happening. In fact she made the decision to stop chemo. Hospice can be a mind saver for the family as well as the patient.
Nita
I bolded the last sentence because I personally look forward to that part. I think I have to change my ideas about what hospice is. I've never actually interacted with anyone who was receiving hospice care, have only heard about how wonderful it is from friends.
It's tough getting them to agree to it. Do a google search of hospice with your zip code. This will give you an idea of what's available. Here is the web site for the one we used Samaritan. If you look at the pallative; it says they do nursing home visits. See if you have something similar to this.
My dad fought everything & I tried to respect his wishes but there were things I should have done behind his back; like a wheelchair. Very hard to push a man a little bigger then me down a few steps while he's sitting on the walker seat. He went downhill so quick that there was no time to pick one up.
We also signed up for transitions but did not get to use it because of how quick he went.
Do yourself a favor; start setting things up. They can call themselves visiting nurses.
The facility where my mom lives uses a hospice service that has been recommended to me by others. I will call them this week and talk about it. They'll come in and visit, and we don't have to move her.
I just got a call that she's experiencing calf pain and one leg is swollen and red. Numbness in her foot. The doctor wants to see her right away, so I'm on my way.
Last night I got 8 hrs sleep for the first time in a long time. The last two days have been really good. Yesterday she was laughing and joking on the phone, walking down the hall, and feeling good enough to ask if we could go downstairs and use the computer today and check her email. My daughter is visiting her this morning and my plan was to join her for lunch (on my lunch hour). Now the roller coaster has started up again, and I am reeling.
The facility where my mom lives uses a hospice service that has been recommended to me by others. I will call them this week and talk about it. They'll come in and visit, and we don't have to move her.
I just got a call that she's experiencing calf pain and one leg is swollen and red. Numbness in her foot. The doctor wants to see her right away, so I'm on my way.
Last night I got 8 hrs sleep for the first time in a long time. The last two days have been really good. Yesterday she was laughing and joking on the phone, walking down the hall, and feeling good enough to ask if we could go downstairs and use the computer today and check her email. My daughter is visiting her this morning and my plan was to join her for lunch (on my lunch hour). Now the roller coaster has started up again, and I am reeling.
try and smile if that is possible and if you believe in prayer, it can help get eveyone through tough times, if you don't that is ok as well. I will say a little prayer for your mom if that is ok with you?
Nita
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