I lived in down town New Bern for about 8 months. I'm a youngin', and I loved it for the most part. Plenty of good restaurants, a stellar down town area that is in a class of its own (and only getting better by the building). They are building a lot of condos, but honestly, they're attractive and add to the character of the city. Keep in mind, I am referring mostly to down town New Bern here.
You can go to the Sheraton deck party on Friday nights I believe - there's dancing and drinks and what not. Lots of people to socialize with. At the same place, every now and then they play live jazz music on Sunday afternoons. The jazz is great.
Homes are for sale like crazy in New Bern - why? Well, you know! There's a very decent library within walking distance of the downtown area with computers, and you guessed it...books! A well kept gas station... grocery stores and wal-mart are within 4 miles. At peak traffic it never takes more than 15 mins to get pretty much anywhere in the city.
Lot's of cool shops. Dancing classes, art classes, art gallerys, hand made decoritive items, not to mention the coolest church you'll ever see that also plays beautiful bells at certain times of the day. Pretty cool to hear on a cool quiet evening on the porch.
There's the tryon palace, which has amazing flower gardens - some of which are free of admission charge. The tryon palace also puts on some of the coolest events you'll ever see - such as last years July 4th, staged at tryon palace with a live renowned orchestra performance. That was cool to say the least. Not to mention the characters and what not of the 1700's.
There's a great hardware store on Middle St (?) called Mitchells that carries everything you may need for a minor repair. If not, Lowes is up the road next to Wal-Mart.
Ice cream shops, Cafes, Union Point Water Park, the list just goes on for New Bern. All within walking distance. Also, it's on the water...that just gives it an extra little edge I think.
Also, a new private school was just built by the best selling author
[SIZE=3]Nicholas Sparks for exceptional children, and it's called Epiphany ( [/SIZE]http://www.epiphany-nb.org/ ) It also has an emphasis on religious values.
Don't know much about the other surrounding schools, however they can't be too bad.
I'm leaving out a lot about New Bern obviously, but I have yet to find a city that has the same vibe New Bern has going on. Very proud city and residents for the most part.
Now, I didn't read all of this thread before positing this, but I did read that you were hearing bad things about New Bern. Probably, you are hearing about the lower class parts of town where there is more crime and what not. Never had a problem with any crime personally, nor has a good friend of mine who lives right on the edge of one of these neighborhoods. Each part of the city tends to keep to themselves.
Well, opinions are like....brains
Everyone has one...so there's mine. Hope I helped, PM me for any questions you might have.