I'm here 10 months in and feel like I'm not fitting in "Bigly"? (Denver: college, casino)

[pikabike]

Originally Posted by history nerd

It's interesting how most people responddin g have been transplants... The story is so much different in every way for natives. Try moving out of the trendy areas and come experience real Colorado.

The OP specifically asked transplants to share their experiences. Go back and read the starter post. It is the next to last paragraph.

[IndyRC]

Originally Posted by skins_fan82

I had to quote you on this. I am very much the same personality type, and I've noticed I have to tone it down A LOT around the people I work with and the friends I've made here. People here are a lot more upbeat and positive. Not that I'm not (LOL), but I am very sarcastic and have a very dark sense of humor. I agree that that wouldn't jive with a lot of folks around here. Maybe it's because we're east coasters?

I was married when I moved here but IMO there is no shortage of good looking women in this area, especially in the city. But "noticing" them vs actually trying to date them are two totally different things and I have single guy friends in their early 30s who have told me they've had a hard time dating here.

Best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

My wife and I both have that same type of sarcastic and dark sense of humor. I realize that type isn't for everybody, but it does seem to be less acceptable here in Denver and I tone it down as well. So there's a lady at work that people don't seem overly fond of. Wife and I went to a party at her house and it turns out her and her husband have the exact same sense of humor. So that explains it, but we've been getting along great haha. On the other hand, another coworker said she wanted to hang out with us again...I smiled and said "yeah that would be great" as I thought to myself "boooring." I know, shame on me.

[Timmyy]

Friday is my 18th anniversary of living here and I still love it. The weather is great and I have never had any issues making new friends and I met my wife here. I have seen a lot of change in 18 years, good and bad.

That being said if the opportunity ever came up I would move back to San Diego because the ocean means more to me than the mountains. I totally understand that Denver isn't for everyone.

[JrzDefector]

Moved here from Jersey 6 years ago, and I love it. I find that people here are a little more aloof, but I've still easily made friends, mostly with other transplants. I think as long as you find a milieu where you can be yourself, you're fine. I'm very involved in a few writing groups and a bit less involved in the two book clubs I belong to (one of which is an offshoot of my main writing group). There, my own Jersey style is embraced affectionately.

I also belong to some dog sport groups, and I've made some good friends through that. With dog sports, my somewhat darker personality is perfectly acceptable and I get along with most people. But I haven't made the very close friends that I've made through my writing groups quite so easily. I also feel those connections are more fragile.

So try some groups on for size and see if any of them click. Basically, since I moved here, I've accepted that I'm going to be the most foul-mouthed and noisy person in any group I'm in. Since I don't actually cuss at people, nobody cares if I drop a few f-bombs for emphasis.

The part about you being ANGRY, though, OP? That's a huge turnoff for anyone - get a grip on yourself and tone it down. People can sense anger, and they naturally steer clear of it.

[bluescreen73]

If you don't go into the foothills/mountains more than a couple times a year then you may as well move to Dallas or OKC - two cities that are absolutely boring for outdoor lovers, but have a much lower COL.

[rtloucks]

I think the mentality of Denver is so much more like that of California than that of anywhere else I have lived. What bothered me the most is the "hey, its ok... everything will be alright and everything will take care of itself" attitude that seems to be common out there. I grew up in Minnesota, son of generations of farmers and I believe my work ethic is top notch. I go in early, I stay until thee job is done and don't take unnecessary breaks in between. This is also how i choose to live around my own home and out and about. So living in Denver drove me batty. I don't know if I would really call it a lazy atmosphere because that will surely offend most, but it is just ultra relaxed and no high sense of urgency for anything there. Everything from going to the bank, shopping at stores, dining out, my mail man, whatever it was it seemed like it moved in slow motion without concern for safety to security. Or it was what seemed like backward thinking. i want to share a long story, but ill sum it up.

Before I left town I sold a truck to a guy, a business owner of a very large company in the area. We went to his bank to cash the Business check he wrote me. with him standing there, the teller literally got the manager and called the company to verify that the check was valid. Although I appreciate the security measure, He was standing next to me. So when he answered his phone to verify it (which seemed like a bad episode of Abbott and Costello) they hung up and continued to finger print me, make me fill out a tax form (why? not sure because it was a sale of a vehicle) and the made me write down my social security number on a piece of blank paper in front of everyone. Which after i threw a fit about and finally agreed to as long ass everyone would step aside, the teller called some phone number to run my social but didnt type it in... no she said my whole social out loud in front of the whole bank and everyone in it. WOW, I was not pleased. She then tossed the blank paper with my social in the garbage can behind her..... not cool. I made her give me the paper back so i could dispose of it. So after almost 1 hour and 45 minutes.... i finally got my money. the business owner apologized up and down etc. It was not his fault though. What was even better was when after the transaction she had the nerve to look me in the eyes and ask me if i was interested in opening an account..... HUH, Seriously I asked and then proceeded to explain to her everything she did wrong in that whole transaction in detail and even a few privacy laws she broke.

Anyway, this was just one example of the many bad business transaction that took place in Colorado.
I think people that love it there are extremely proud and that is great, but they should really just keep it to themselves and not embellish the facts to others looking for honest advice. Even about the weather....

[MN_Ski]

^ Your experience is very similar to what many of my East Coast co workers say about Denver. Where I live in Highlands, there are a lot of East Coast transplants. Tons of NY, Mass, NJ, MD, VA plates. And it is so easy to point out the East Coasters at the grocery store, whether driving around the parking lot, or how they stand in line at the cashier. I'm one of those people that likes to leave plenty of space between myself and the person in front of me. Like if someone is picking fruit at a cooler, I like to patiently wait for them to finish, and stand a few feet back until they are done. So many times I'll have someone brush right up against me, and just push their way next to the person to grab the same item. Or waiting in line, if I'm not standing like 1" away from the person in front of me, the second they move forward, someone always manages to push their way in front of me. It's almost like they can't help it. They see an open space and they NEED to fill it. Usually if I call it out they move back, so it seems to be done subconsciously.

As for your experience, I lived in Minneapolis myself for awhile, and I felt like many aspects of the city were just as laid back as Denver...at least more so than Milwaukee where I grew up. But most of my experiences are in more social environments.

[SkyDog77]

People in Denver don't appreciate dark sarcastic humor?

One glance at the regular posters on this forum should have been enough to tell you that nobody here likes sarcasm.

[Count David]

Originally Posted by SkyDog77

People in Denver don't appreciate dark sarcastic humor?

One glance at the regular posters on this forum should have been enough to tell you that nobody here likes sarcasm.

What? You're kidding, right?

[SkyDog77]

Originally Posted by David Aguilar

What? You're kidding, right?

No. I'm a native and don't get sarcasm.