How do you tell a woman she needs to get in shape ? (workout, running)
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Don't tell me "you don't" ! There has to be some way to bring it up and encourage / support , ask them to loose weight and get in shape without hurting their feelings. I know being pushy or rude is no way to go but somebody has had to have hit on the exact combination of timing and words to pull it off
Question OP. What is your relationship to this woman?
Weight can be a very touchy issue. Honestly, there is not much you can do.
Having the recognition of being an unhealthy weight, a desire to change it, and the motivation to see it through is all something your SO must have for themselves regardless of what you say or what you want.
So really, although "you don't" is not an appropriate answer, there is nothing you can say or a way you can approach it that will instill all of that in another person. It boils down to the old adage that you cannot change someone. (However, they can change themselves).
My recommendation is that if she has no desire to even recognize a weight issue, then it isn't anything worth continuing to bring up. At least in direct relation to weight. Continuing to do so will just generate fights and eventual resentment which could become a wedge between you two. Instead, just ask, schedule, encourage doing "healthy" things without making it at all about weight. Do a date "rollerblading" or do dinner dates by cooking meals instead of going out. Stay away from unhealthy things (ice cream, alcoholic beverages, pizza, etc).
If deep down she knows she has a weight issue, and has some desire to do something to move towards a healthier lifestyle, be supportive by facilitating it (not talking about it). If she wants to follow a specific diet, do not eat things she cannot have in front of her. Eat her diet when around her, and supplement if you need more calories/etc. Be cogniscent her specific diet needs may also be different than yours in this regard too. Give her the space, time, and freedom to work out.
If she is not in the mood for a workout, or wants a cheat day, do not be critical. Do not nag her to push her to do something. Do not shame her for anything. None of that works.
Howrver, she MUST want it herself and be motivated herself. Your job is not not be a hinderance if she does.
Don't tell me "you don't" ! There has to be some way to bring it up and encourage / support , ask them to loose weight and get in shape without hurting their feelings. I know being pushy or rude is no way to go but somebody has had to have hit on the exact combination of timing and words to pull it off
Well, you go over there, enter the Lions cage, close and lock the door behind.
Now, approach quickly to the King-Of-The-Jungle and tell it to be nice.
I once dated a woman where the focus and thing we had most in common was we both loved fine dining. We tried out all the places everywhere we went and it was a blast. One night while having wine she through the ole, "would you still love me if I got really fat." I told her of course, and it was the truth. Problem is, I left out the part about, how I would not like it and I probably would not find you sexy anymore or be into you physically. Well, over the next year she gained 50 pounds. She was an average built girl before the weight gain and perfect in my eyes. I was so turned off by this we all but stopped having sex and the relationship faded out.
I never could find a politically correct way to tell her what her intentional, lack of caring for me or herself did, weight gain was doing to me. But I wish I had, cause she was a good girl in every other way.
Buy her a present, a lovely dress 1 or 2 size smaller.
Yes, this is an awesome thing to do. My grandmother did this to me when I was a teenager. I didn't realize I was a size 5 until I was in college, because I thought I was supposed to shop in the girls' section and I thought that at 115-120 lbs. I was a size 14. It was the best, and certainly gives me fond memories of how much my grandmother cared about me for who I was and not how I looked.
It doesn't mess with one's self esteem at all and will give you the exact intended result of having her get off her fat arse and exercise. Also, she will feel sooooo thankful that you helped her out in this way!!
Don't tell me "you don't" ! There has to be some way to bring it up and encourage / support , ask them to loose weight and get in shape without hurting their feelings. I know being pushy or rude is no way to go but somebody has had to have hit on the exact combination of timing and words to pull it off
It's a no win situation. It's proabably best to date somebody who's into fitness and exercise to begin with. The only other thing I can think of is if you ask her to come work out with you, and even then some women would be offended by that, because they think you trying to say that they're fat(which is true), or what if she doesn't want to?
Yeah if he wansts to start a fight or deal with a woman with an attitude.
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