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These type of posts usually show up in the retirement forum, and as well intentioned as the given OP might be, they invariably turn into a beat down. There's a large contingent here, that believes everyone who arrives at age 65, must have a multi-million dollar portfolio. Otherwise, life has been a waste. And don't dare speak of taking advantage of any government programs. Be sure to self-fund your end of life nursing home stay, because using Medicare is just plain wrong.
I call them the "I'm a taxpayer, and you should have saved" threads.
It’s simply an objective fact that those who arrive at old age with a plan and some bank are better off than those who lived their lives “for the now”. And now face begging their fellow man for a crap shoebox apartment and section 8 vouchers. That’s a suckoid existence. But chickens do come home to roost and failure to plan is planning to fail.
The criticism of those who did and do plan for the future and exercise focus and discipline is simply regret and envy. Completely understandable. To arrive at 60 with no material income and assets to carry you through to death has to be a bitter and frightening prospect. Your physical capabilities are dropping, and there is no longer going to be time or energy to correct the mistake that you made in not saving and planning for this time. So now you are forced to consider depending on family or public largesse and it is quite natural to feel envy and hate for those who didn’t make the mistakes you did.
But the chickens do come home to roost and reality is reality. Not much you can do about it except complain and project your inadequacy on those around you.
But if you are 30 and reading the hate-spew of people who made this mistake, it is incumbent upon you to learn the lessons and make the course corrections to avoid this ignominious fate. You should be saving 20% of your income while you are young and strong. Straight into tax deferred retirement accounts and investments. You should also plan on buying a house and owning it outright before the age of 50. 60 tops.
If you exercise basic diligence and focus, it is not a major achievement to be anticipating $5,000 to $10,000 per month guaranteed income and a paid-for home to enjoy it in. Major stress is gone. That can also help you to live longer, and certainly better.
It is better to BE a person who did this, then to envy them when you didn’t.
Last edited by Marc Paolella; 07-11-2021 at 07:17 AM..
it makes me wonder. When those people go to the barber shop and chatting with the barber, are they really thinking "what a loser". When they take the kids to ballet class are they inwardly sneering that the teacher didn't pick a lucrative career? When they go to the theater do they really look down on the people who brought them the experience because their career goals are unrealistic? The people who bring them music, art, drive their taxis, cook for them in restaurants. All the 'losers' that do the things that make their own lives better. And, guess what, many are doing their jobs because they love them and aren't aspiring to be real estate salespeople.
There's an old school diner near me. Hasn't changed since it was built and the old guy behind the grill has been there for 47 years and he's proud of it. great stories and back and forth with the customers. Or my barber, Emilio who has been cutting hair in the same shop since he came from Italy in the 70s. The salt of the earth people who make many people's lives richer and more interesting. The million 'losers' without who life will be bland and colorless. I am quite sure they will be remembered and missed when they pass long after everyone has forgotten who showed them their house or sold them their insurance policy.
It's not sour grapes when I shudder at the vapid lives of the retirees in the mile upon mile of beige stucco condo complexes all over Florida - all surviving on a dozen medications. I'd be reading the labels to see how many of them I'd need to take to end my misery. But that's just me. If nothing else, posting my question and the memories it stirred up in my responses has made me so happy and grateful for the life I've had. Wouldn't trade it for all the 'normal' lives in the world. and certainly don't regret it.
Seems like you are working pretty hard to convince yourself of your own happiness. Get back to us when you are actually convinced.
I had an overachieving cousin like you. Use to show up at family reunions. By that time most of us were in our 60's. He would walk around lecturing everyone about their life failures. He died at 64, and the rest of us, despite being such losers, are still here in our 70's.
I don’t think he’s like me. I’m actually very pleasant at family gatherings. I actually treat them as an event planner would, and my main focus is making sure everyone has a good time. Good food, good drinks, good music, games, and plenty of places to sit and relax. I love lecturing as much as the next guy, but family gatherings are not the time or place.
As someone who works in health care, I would say keep in mind that you would be far from medical facilities and might have a very hard time if you need home health one day. I really wouldn't;t recommend that a senior live alone in the middle of nowhere, without any neighbors, nearby stores, etc. What's going to happen when you can no longer drive living in a place like that?
Once there is a guy who lived alone in a trailer in a rural area(I think in PA),dont know his age but a tree fell on his trailer and crushed his leg,it was a Saturday and he figured no one will come around until Monday,so he shot himself !could be the pain was too unbearable !
So it looks like although he cant move ,he has a gun nearby but no cell phone to call for help.
But some one did come around next day(Sunday),but it was too late.
Once there is a guy who lived alone in a trailer in a rural area(I think in PA),dont know his age but a tree fell on his trailer and crushed his leg,it was a Saturday and he figured no one will come around until Monday,so he shot himself !could be the pain was too unbearable !
So it looks like although he cant move ,he has a gun nearby but no cell phone to call for help.
But some one did come around next day(Sunday),but it was too late.
we decided against retiring in the poconos where we had a second home .
few choices in medical facility's , specialists , hospitals , etc .
plus if i couldnt drive there is no public transportation or uber/lyft
we had scranton hospital , that was really it .
when gloria estafan was injured in the area the first thing they did once she was stabilized is get her out of there and in to a nyc trauma hospital .
so we sold it and are staying right here in queens
it makes me wonder. When those people go to the barber shop and chatting with the barber, are they really thinking "what a loser". When they take the kids to ballet class are they inwardly sneering that the teacher didn't pick a lucrative career? When they go to the theater do they really look down on the people who brought them the experience because their career goals are unrealistic? The people who bring them music, art, drive their taxis, cook for them in restaurants. All the 'losers' that do the things that make their own lives better. And, guess what, many are doing their jobs because they love them and aren't aspiring to be real estate salespeople.
There's an old school diner near me. Hasn't changed since it was built and the old guy behind the grill has been there for 47 years and he's proud of it. great stories and back and forth with the customers. Or my barber, Emilio who has been cutting hair in the same shop since he came from Italy in the 70s. The salt of the earth people who make many people's lives richer and more interesting. The million 'losers' without who life will be bland and colorless. I am quite sure they will be remembered and missed when they pass long after everyone has forgotten who showed them their house or sold them their insurance policy.
It's not sour grapes when I shudder at the vapid lives of the retirees in the mile upon mile of beige stucco condo complexes all over Florida - all surviving on a dozen medications. I'd be reading the labels to see how many of them I'd need to take to end my misery. But that's just me. If nothing else, posting my question and the memories it stirred up in my responses has made me so happy and grateful for the life I've had. Wouldn't trade it for all the 'normal' lives in the world. and certainly don't regret it.
There's really strange people on this forum.
As you have seen, the majority of posters in this thread have been helpful.
It's crazy, but one of the posters who criticized you mooching off the government admitted in another thread ... having a high paying job where they only had to work many days 30 minutes a day and then the rest of the time had nothing to do.
It's not my style to out such people (and I absolutely could), but if that isn't the definition of an insane person, I don't know what is... regardless, those are the types of people you are taking criticism from. Not just here, but in life.
Humanity blows my mind sometimes.
Once there is a guy who lived alone in a trailer in a rural area(I think in PA),dont know his age but a tree fell on his trailer and crushed his leg,it was a Saturday and he figured no one will come around until Monday,so he shot himself !could be the pain was too unbearable !
So it looks like although he cant move ,he has a gun nearby but no cell phone to call for help.
But some one did come around next day(Sunday),but it was too late.
I agree with Marc...heck, with the way RE is skyrocketing, you would probably be able to pay her back and sooner rather than later! Imagine a nice yard for your sweet dog....
Yeah he needs to think of the dog. To be happy and healthy they need space, grass and fresh air.
As you have seen, the majority of posters in this thread have been helpful.
It's crazy, but one of the posters who criticized you mooching off the government admitted in another thread ... having a high paying job where they only had to work many days 30 minutes a day and then the rest of the time had nothing to do.
It's not my style to out such people (and I absolutely could), but if that isn't the definition of an insane person, I don't know what is... regardless, those are the types of people you are taking criticism from. Not just here, but in life.
Humanity blows my mind sometimes.
I wouldn't say "insane" is the right descriptor but maybe crotchety or cantankerous, petty etc.
Given OP has been working for 50 years him using social benefits is not the issue - The issue is depriving himself of comfortable golden years because of an over-fixation on independence and pride/ego.
I have been helped in this life by strangers and I have paid it forward several times... So to deny assistance from blood - I would like to understand if there is an actual family rift or if it's just ego.
To me, there is no worse than living out my final years in poverty... I have given my younger sister money and advice, so if she can help me if I'm struggling later in life, it's just returning the favor.
Somebody in this forum needs to get off their high horse. It's not attractive at all, not convincing, and the claim of envy is humorous at best, and very untrue of the OP.
The OP has lived a full life without planning endlessly to sit in his old age with a fat wallet. So what? I do not envy those who have much more than I have, I'm far more glad to have lived, and walked away several times from a comfortable setting of security. I knew which life would bring me more adventures, zeal, joie de vivre. I took that route instead and I am so glad I did not give up life's adventures for a better financial security. I certainly could have. I would not trade my gleeful memories for any amount of money in the world.
I have more than enough to get by in my old age when I'm done working. Do I have enough to buy a McMansion? No I don't, and I don't envy the people who worry about whether they have the latest greatest LV leather purse and whether there is a dandelion growing in their perfect lawn, that kind of existence makes me smirk.
Real exciting life is messy. Some of us prefer that.
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