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What are you looking for? Have you defined what you want/need? What did you like about Sarasota and what made you think you would like Springfield? Other than it being difficult to make friends, what is it you don't like about the area (from your list of needs/wants).
But I understand the search...we did the same thing when we retired...looking for the perfect place. We lived in No. Cal when we retired (and loved it BTW), but it was too expensive from a retirement viewpoint. Moved to Las Vegas as an interim move while we looked for our "ideal" spot (it didn't exist by the way). So we looked and researched states by weather, by taxes, by proximity to friends/family, by proximity to tourist things, by financially well managed states, by retirement "perks", etc. Only to find out that there was no ideal place. We did a pro-con list with several areas. We also both made out a list of the top 5 NEEDS and top 5 WANTS and then cross references for the common ones and weighted the rest. Still no perfect place.
What we have finally found is that any place you relatively like will become home if you give it a chance. "Paper" analysis and statistics don't tell you the picture. You need to spend time (both winter and summer) and an area to actually understand the dynamics. How much time did you spend in the area before you made a decision?
We finally did end up in this area (between Ozark and Springfield) and the longer we are here the more we like it. We haven't particularly found it hard to make friends (everyone is very friendly, but mostly established in their own lifes) but we have to work harder at it (we don't work anymore which also makes it more difficult).
But if it makes you feel any better, the "where" is the hardest part of retirement. My question has always been "why" do we feel we need to move in retirement? Is it some sort of nomadic gene that kicks in? Or is it just a financial issue?
Last edited by mrschilicook; 12-16-2007 at 11:34 AM..
Reason: type
Lots of folks just love NC, I know, but we toured what seemed like alot of the state before we moved here, and it did not appeal to us. At that time, my hair was still growing back in from chemo and I wore a kerchief instead of my wig for comfort sometimes, and that was the only state in our many state tours in which people just flat out stopped what they were doing and stared at me. Kind of put a bad vibe on the state for me. We toured NC, SC, GA, TN, AL, Ark, FL, and MO during that time, spending several weeks in each state, different cities. I'm sure that's not enough of a reason to eliminate an entire state or it's population, but it sticks in my mind and I can't shake it. As far as CA goes, lived in Orange Co back in the 70's for a few months and even then couldn't get past the fact that I knew the sun was out because I saw shadows, but I couldn't see the sun for the smog. I know, one place, big state. San Diego was nice then, but really have no interest in the west coast. Have worked with many nurses from Cali, it's a different world in nursing for sure by their accounts. I know the midwest is not for everyone, either.
Thanks for the thoughts re: NC and CA, though. Do appreciate the intent to help.
I don't know what to say about the folks down here who stared at you as that is rude behavior anywhere you go. Next time here in The Tarheel State be sure to visit the eastern section away from Raleigh and the cities, into the small towns and rural areas down to the great beaches on our coast.. My intent WAS to help and I wish you the best in your search. I hope your medical problems which caused you to undergo chemo treatments have all been solved, cured and ancient history now.
[SIZE=3]I hear what all of you are saying, but I am in huge dilemma right now I am a black South African female accountant in her twenties and have decided to move to the US but have no idea which state I want to move to. I looked at all the data/info provided but it is so overwhelming. Can anyone please help share or bring to light on how I can do my research and come to a conclusion on which state and city I can move to?[/SIZE]
[SIZE=3]The info is there, but can anyone just give me a quick summary about the states what to look for when it comes to work, places to live, social life and which state is the best state to move to and where not to move to?[/SIZE]
[SIZE=3]Cheers![/SIZE]
[SIZE=3]This is more difficult compared to when I was moving to Europe.[/SIZE]
Hi SunshineGirl,
...been there, done that. We spent about two years researching online and traveling to visit some of the potential cities. I did not want it to be too cold (lived in Toronto,CN) neither in the coastal area, because of hurricanes (lived in Miami,FL).
But for some unknown reason during my online research the city of Charlotte, NC never showed up. My husband who visited this area 12 years ago, ask me to do some research about it and turned out to be just what were looking for, great schools, family oriented, great city without high density, great housing, low taxes; etc.
We came for a visit and confirmed that this was the place for us.
We have been living here since early this year and really enjoy it.
My advise to you, try to get in touch with people that had already relocated and ask them to share their experience. Good Luck with your relocation!
Thank you for starting this thread. Until you and the others that have responded I thought I was the only one who had this predicatment! It has been great reading the posts.
Moving is a daunting task even in the best of circumstances. Sometimes I wish there was someone out there that would just TELL me what to do. I am considering making a move myself. I want certain things - I don't want certain things. I put so much pressure on myself because I want the move to be the right one for sure and not temporary that I get stuck. If it were truly as simply as a checklist...
Keep your chin up and good luck with your search and your eventual choice!
If you have the resources, perhaps you could rent an RV and travel around to all the places that look good to you, stay a while in each place and then decide.
Thanks mikeyNC-yes health issues are much improved. And thanks charlotte and TNdreamin. Mrs. Chili-have always maintained that Spgfld nice for most, but not a fit for us, glad it's working for you. We do not want to "give it more time". We've been here a full year now, and not much has changed. Life is too short to stay somewhere in which we are unhappy and have the desire and the ability to leave. I fully realize we made a mistake, it is no one's fault but ours, we acknowledge that, and we are moving forward to correct that. And if the next place doesn't suit, we'll move on again, although we are trying harder to do more reasearch and spend more actual time in the next place first.
Never went to Charlotte, hubby wants to stay away from the coastal areas, but folks generally speak very well of it. TN-I wish I could travel in an RV, I think I'm really a gypsy. But must work for food....
Not looking for nirvana or utopia, just a decent place to live, work, and play. A place with more plusses than minusses. A place where you come home and feel relaxed and happy. A place where you are and have good neighbors. A place where your kids actually want to stay and raise their families because it's just that kind of place. A place with a sense of community spirit. A place with foward thinking community leaders who do not own the town/city. A tolerant, friendly place. Oh wait, maybe I am looking for nirvana.....
Life is too short to stay somewhere in which we are unhappy and have the desire and the ability to leave. I fully realize we made a mistake, it is no one's fault but ours, we acknowledge that, and we are moving forward to correct that.
I really admire your willingness to acknowledge your mistake and move on. That takes alot of courage. I agree that life is too short to stay in a place that you don't like. I spent way too many years living in a place where I didn't enjoy living. Moving to a better location has been a real blessing for me. I trust you'll find a better place too...when the time is right.
Thanks mikeyNC-yes health issues are much improved. And thanks charlotte and TNdreamin. Mrs. Chili-have always maintained that Spgfld nice for most, but not a fit for us, glad it's working for you. We do not want to "give it more time". We've been here a full year now, and not much has changed. Life is too short to stay somewhere in which we are unhappy and have the desire and the ability to leave. I fully realize we made a mistake, it is no one's fault but ours, we acknowledge that, and we are moving forward to correct that. And if the next place doesn't suit, we'll move on again, although we are trying harder to do more reasearch and spend more actual time in the next place first.
Never went to Charlotte, hubby wants to stay away from the coastal areas, but folks generally speak very well of it. TN-I wish I could travel in an RV, I think I'm really a gypsy. But must work for food....
Not looking for nirvana or utopia, just a decent place to live, work, and play. A place with more plusses than minusses. A place where you come home and feel relaxed and happy. A place where you are and have good neighbors. A place where your kids actually want to stay and raise their families because it's just that kind of place. A place with a sense of community spirit. A place with foward thinking community leaders who do not own the town/city. A tolerant, friendly place. Oh wait, maybe I am looking for nirvana.....
We are in the same situation you are. Lots of folks on the forum looking to move to, where we would like to move from. It is difficult to admit when you have made a mistake, especially when it isn't one so easily remedied. Some days we feel frustrated and disappointed, but as you so eloquently stated, life is too short and you just shouldn't have to work so hard at being happy in a place. I have seen many a post on the forum stating something to the affect that you can be happy anywhere if you have the right frame of mind. While you can find a level of contentedness in a place, if it isn't a fit, then it just isn't and sugar coating it or pretending won't make it so. I wish you and your family the best of luck in finding your "utopia" as I do believe everyone has one and CAN find it.
Best Wishes and Good Health!
Terri
I am out of reps for the day, but will send some your way soon.
We were in a similar situation two years ago. We had moved from the West Coast to the Mid-West and didn't like it there at all.
Couldn't figure out where to go, though. Housing prices were a big issue, as we wanted to buy a house.
Wound up buying a Road Atlas. We would pick one state at a time, and do extensive research - then cross it off the list. Didn't think we would ever find anything that was a "fit" for us...
For various reasons, we crossed out one state after another. We were running out of states!
Finally, we decided on a part of the country. So that narrowed our search down to a half a dozen states. Would pick one, research it online.
That way was the most helpful. At least if we knew what part of the country we wanted to live in, if we made a mistake or didn't like it there - we could pick a nearby state to live in.
We narrowed down our research, made our big move and are very happy now and are living in an area whose culture we "fit in."
We were in a similar situation two years ago. We had moved from the West Coast to the Mid-West and didn't like it there at all.
Couldn't figure out where to go, though. Housing prices were a big issue, as we wanted to buy a house.
Wound up buying a Road Atlas. We would pick one state at a time, and do extensive research - then cross it off the list. Didn't think we would ever find anything that was a "fit" for us...
For various reasons, we crossed out one state after another. We were running out of states!
Finally, we decided on a part of the country. So that narrowed our search down to a half a dozen states. Would pick one, research it online.
That way was the most helpful. At least if we knew what part of the country we wanted to live in, if we made a mistake or didn't like it there - we could pick a nearby state to live in.
We narrowed down our research, made our big move and are very happy now and are living in an area whose culture we "fit in."
Great Post and welcome to the forum! Hopefully we will be as fortunate as you and will find our 'fit' soon! Reps to ya...
Terri
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Dilemma - don't know what state to move to? help
