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Having moved three times since I graduated college, I somewhat agree with the OP. Moving too much for the sake of moving can really set you back in other ways. I recommend that any person coming out of college to think both short term and long term and decide where they will be happiest and move there. It's not a small town for everybody though that may work for some people. Younger people tend to be migrating to urban areas, but I think by your mid 20s you should really be thinking more long-term. It's much harder to move and start over the older you are. That said, if you are really unhappy somewhere, you are better off to move than stay there and be miserable. That is something I am going to have to decide myself if I really believe within the next few years.
Moving is costly. And time consuming. Plus, you don't want a job hopper resume. I have moved for the last time. I am done. I don't even care about a better job. I just want to relax. Have hobbies aside from packing and unpacking. I don't want to live by the beach, or any thing any more. I don't want to buy a house. I am done. No more moving for me.
Moving gives us a chance to clear out the clutter we accumulate. I was really stressed when we moved across country in 2011, but is was also liberating to get rid of so many items we no longer used. We are moving across country again in two months, and it is surprising how much more stuff we gathered since the last time we moved.
I'm a diplomat and I move every few years and my life is fine. I would have jumped off a bridge if I had to spend my entire life in the town where I grew up. YMMV.
Last edited by Aville239; 07-29-2013 at 12:36 PM..
I understand what you mean--I always thought I wanted to own a house more than anything, but I do love--at least I love the idea--that I can pick up and move any time I want to.
That being said, I think you hit the nail on the head when you say move within the same metro area.
As so many posters here have talked about (and what I also said in my post from 2009), it doesn't get any easier the older you get--to make friends, change jobs, or keep in touch with old friends who are now occupied with their children and grandchildren.
Re what Aville239 said above:
You are being too dismissive and to say that this topic and what the OP said is BS is much too harsh.
You say you are a diplomat? Lucky you. It sounds to me like--and I am including myself in this assessment and am not speaking for everyone--most of the people who have moved a lot have moved due to financial problems, health problems, and issues with their significant other that were largely out of their control.
By moving around most of my life, I have left jobs where I could have been very successful if I had just stayed for more than a year or so. In one particular job, I could have landed a position somewhere abroad (and now I just am praying that I have a chance to travel abroad someday).
I have had some mental health issues that have contributed to my many moves and somewhat erratic behavior, but I still think that moving a lot--in general--is detrimental to creating and maintaining meaningful relationships.
Right now I am back in my old hometown because I was so lonely that I had to move near to my sister. I must say, THANK GOD I DIDN'T STAY HERE all my life! However, I have lost touch with nearly all my long-distance friends. I, of course, hope to move again someday--where? I don't know, but I do know what to look for now and I also know that I will not leave my sister behind. It is too lonely. (I am nearly 49 now.)
I guess diplomats can take their families with them when they travel/move, and I am thinking that they probably earn enough to fly here and there to keep up friendships and family relationships. Not everyone is that lucky.
OP's advice is a bit outdated. These days, more and more, people are moving. I used to have a very large social circle here, but in the past 2 years I have watched them all leave for greener pastures or just disappear. I still have some friends here, but even many of them are trying to leave as well. If I were to stay here, I'd still have to make new friends. And jobs? ha, that loyalty is out the window. More and more companies are finding ways to cut their senior employees loose for cheaper and younger employees. It's sad but true. My last job was going through layoffs around the time I left. You would have thought the first people to go were the lazy, early 20 year olds we had. Nope, they cut the over 40 group that had been there for 15 years. I've been seeing this for years but it's getting worse.
I'm 34 and will be moving this week for the 19th time since I graduated high school. Grant it, this one is within town but I've covered 4 states and countless cities.
The job hopper resume has never been an issue for me. I've always been moving up or getting more education/training. Then again, I'm a selfish prick in my interviews.
Moving "too much" is relative. To someone living in their home town their entire lives, moving more than once might be "too much." For people who are more acclimated to it or want to explore, maybe a dozen times isn't too much. I can say after a certain age, any moving is too much! However, I have known people in their 60's or early 70's moving, building a home.
I moved to MI from GA with my husband about 2 years ago. I don't have any family here at all. Now Im divorcing my husband and cant decide whether to stay or go back to Atlanta. I have a great job and my son adores his school. But once I divorce my husband I will have no one here. ALL of my family is in Atlanta and I miss them dearly. But I didn't like living in Atlanta. How can I survive without the support of my family?
Please somebody help me
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