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I feel sorry for her. While she may of done porn movies for whatever financial gain she saw, she doesn't deserve to get a life threatening illness because of it. I think that the porn industry needs t really look at itself and the harm it does to its performers. The guilty person is the one that infected her. Her fault is not asking that everyone is tested. and doing a gang bang. Gah I can't imagine doing that
I have about as much remorse for someone who chooses a life of porn as I do with someone who chooses to ride a motorcycle with no helmet at 100 mph.
I have empathy for another human no doubt, but there are ALWAYS choices in this life. If you're to a point in your life where you feel that doing porn is a better option for you than say, working at a vet clinic, then you have chosen to accept the risks involved and therefore reap what you sow.
Girls get into porn/prostitution for the money. I dated a stripped for years and there were always "producers" from the porn industry hanging around enticing the strippers with money and drugs. Some girls/guys feel that this is a lifestyle they want to live. My girlfriend at the time seriously considered it when offered $700 a scene (per hour). That was back in the 1990's, girls nowadays earn way more than that per hour, so, I can understand the draw to porn.
Gotta take the good with the bad though, if you choose a risky behavior, you can only expect risky returns.
It's a problem when society normalizes porn as a job. Your average person wouldn't consider doing it yet we are expected to compare it to other jobs you would see posted on a job seeking site. I think people who just think of it as a job have no idea. It is a world full of sleaze, drugs, con artists, and worse, much worse. No one should go there unless they are one of those people and want that kind of life. Most of the entertainment business from the smallest scale to the largest is skeevy. Porn just takes it to the worst of all levels.
The ones I feel sorry for are the very young naïve girls that have no idea, or trafficked young people that are forced into it, etc. Your average stripper/porn star is doing it because they like the money and perks and are exhibitionists. They know the risks and choose to be part of that world.
D I feel bad for her?I don't know. Is she retarded? Does she have some sort of mental illness?An IQ of 65? Was she born " yesterday" ? Has she lived in a shelter her whole life unaware of....everything?
If yes to any of these questions....yes, I feel bad for her. Other wise no.
Because only a holier-than-thou heartless hypocrite thinks its fine for somebody to suffer because they did something ill-advised or out of desperation.
Don in Austin
Well Unlike you I feel people should be held responsible. Would you also feel sorry for someone who gets drunk and runs over a bunch of kindergarten kids standing on a corner waiting for there bus??
Should I feel sorry for the drug addict who gets AIDS from using dirty needles?
Last edited by longneckone; 03-19-2016 at 09:35 AM..
It is hard to feel bad for someone that willingly puts themselves in dangerous situations and gets in trouble.
I think we all feel like this to an extent.
The man in the coal mine is a great example and how could you not have empathy for him? The same goes for the porn star but they both knew it was a job that came with risks.
How about a skydiver or a mountain climber? They both know that those hobbies can kill them and they take every precaution not to die but it happens.
How about the criminal that is breaking into houses to feed his family? How about the one stealing to support his drug habit? How about the criminal that is stealing just for fun? They all have a chance of getting caught by the Police and being thrown in jail or being caught by the gun toting homeowner who shoots them dead.
Who do we feel bad for? Here on city data I think most believe it is a good thing when a criminals luck finally runs out.
Everyday people willingly tempt fate. The key is not being forced into a dangerous situation. If they are exploited it is easy to feel badly for them.
I'm not sure how you go about comparing a criminal breaking into people's houses with pornographic actors and coal miners. Seriously, the latter two are trying to earn an honest and legal living while the former is breaking the law.
Well Unlike you I feel people should be held responsible. Would you also feel sorry for someone who gets drunk and runs over a bunch of kindergarten kids standing on a corner waiting for there bus??
Should I feel sorry for the drug addict who gets AIDS from using dirty needles?
What does "held responsible" in this case mean? It certainly doesn't mean we can't feel sorry for her, as we regularly feel sorry for all sorts of people forced to lay in the bed they made. There are countless examples: people who die from heart attacks brought on by not exercising and eating badly, people who die on commercial fishing vessels, women abused by men who have obvious anger issues, etc.
A drunk running over kindergartners is in no way analogous to this situation. That person hurt a lot of other people, not just himself.
I'm curious about this intuition. Would you feel that way about a person who decided to work on a commercial fishing vessel because it seemed fun? What about a person who decided to be a firefighter because it seemed fun?
My explanation for this disconnect in intuitions is that people are simply hesitant to extend sympathy for behaviors that fall outside the social norm. I don't think it has anything to do with the acceptance of risk.
There is societal value to a commercial fishing operation. People eat because of it.
There is societal value to firefighting. A fireman saves peoples lives and protects homes.
There is no significant societal value to a cheap film of people having sex in a dingy studio; a film that is shown often in a little booth where lonely men go to have anonymous sex, or other such environments. Further, they know the inherent health risks of unprotected sex.
I don't feel it is anyone's responsibility to personally approve of professions that "fall outside the social norm", nor do I feel it is their right to prevent people from pursuing such jobs.
What does personal responsibility have to do with whether we feel bad for someone? I feel bad for folks who have heart attacks even if they should have exercised more and eaten better. Similarly, I feel bad for highway construction workers who get hit and die even if they knew the risks before they took the job.
Again, this is about her being involved in a job that is viewed as being outside social norms, not about risk acceptance.
Because only a holier-than-thou heartless hypocrite thinks its fine for somebody to suffer because they did something ill-advised or out of desperation.
Don in Austin
I think you're waaaaaaaaaaaaaay overstating things.
Who is saying it's fine for people to suffer?
Sympathy is a very personal thing. I feel more sorry for the bad "fates" of some people than I do for the bad "fates" of other people. And yes, it has to do with my personal values.
I have a neighbor who has developed brain cancer. He is refusing treatment. I feel sympathy for him. I hope he doesn't suffer too much (although I fear he will). If he needs help, despite being a very unpleasant person, I will try to help him, and have offered. But since he has made a decision not to have treatment, I will feel a little less sympathy for him than someone who tries treatment and the treatment fails.
There is societal value to a commercial fishing operation. People eat because of it.
There is societal value to firefighting. A fireman saves peoples lives and protects homes.
There is no significant societal value to a cheap film of people having sex in a dingy studio; a film that is shown often in a little booth where lonely men go to have anonymous sex, or other such environments. Further, they know the inherent health risks of unprotected sex.
I don't feel it is anyone's responsibility to personally approve of professions that "fall outside the social norm", nor do I feel it is their right to prevent people from pursuing such jobs.
Most posters in this thread have characterized their reluctance to feeling bad for this girl as a response to her risk acceptance. "She knew the consequences, so why should I feel bad?" has been the most common response. That is very different than saying there is no societal value to her actions. I raised the firefighting and commercial fishing examples as evidence that we often do feel bad for people who are hurt while taking actions with known risks.
Regarding the question of societal value, I think that's a dangerous game to play. Porn is no longer always cheap, filmed in dingy studios or shown in little booths where men go to have anonymous sex (seriously, are we in 1978?). Porn is pretty widespread, and while I am not trying to defend its value to all of society, it is at least clear that millions and millions of people utilize it -- for better or worse.
Quote:
Originally Posted by phetaroi
So what?
Most people have said they don't feel bad for her because she took a known risk and is merely reaping those consequences. That isn't the case. They don't feel bad for her because they simply don't approve of her activity.
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Would you also feel sorry for someone who gets drunk and runs over a bunch of kindergarten kids standing on a corner waiting for there bus?? 
