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Wish I could too elston--I am trying but my mind is wandering to much....oh how that makes me upset with myself! They say it is common with grief...Our brains just take a leave of absence I guess! But I did list 6 different items and sold 4--one of which will bring in some much needed cash but the guys won't be able to pay until tonight and then--get this--he is going to pick it up in April! He's a chess nut and I had my marble chess board and stand up on ebay so he bought it. He lives in Texas and will be down this way come spring so I told him as long as it's paid for it's fine with me. I'll just keep it under the guest bed safe and secure where it has been. He's been searching for just the right board and size and I guess this is the one! It was listed as free local pickup and he doesn't trust shipping so we agreed on me just keeping it here.
I am watching the neighbors 2 dogs this week end---in their own home and yard. I just need t let them out for a while 2 times a day and feed them. I hate it cause they have this security alarm and I always have to remember to shut it off and then turn it back on. That would normally not be a big deal but lately everything is a big deal it seems. Oh well I'm sure God will be there to make sure all goes well! The sun is shining and I did start to clean the entry way--start is the word--now to finish! Not sure why I should even bother as my whole yard is turning into a mud pit from the snow! Oh well I can try to keep up I guess.
cyn......after all the cold that you have had to put up with......melting snow and a mud pit.....is a blessing.
Not really, elston! I'd much prefer the snow. Snow would just come off the boots easily and leave no dirty, clumping mud on the floors. I get what you are saying though. I might see my lawn by June or July. 8' of snow is going to take a long time to melt if we ever get to 32°. Haven't had a day above freezing since January some time.
I just had my friend neighbor from the last house on the street stop by--I'd asked him to. I wanted to know how much gravel or rock is for a driveway---he is the one that does our dirt/gravel road--maintains it best he can on a limited amount of money everyone pitches in. Well it's more then I am going to pay so guess I'll just wait for the sun to dry it up a bit. He said he is going to have to redo the road after it dries up because it is so bad now and last year we didn't pitch in on the money because of our situation but this year I'll take some from my savings because It's only right to help if I live here too. They always help me and he was the one that found the people who are buying the transmission parts and racing pictures so it's the least I can do. There is a lot more to living out here then I ever imagined with wells, roads, repairs etc.....never ending. My son said when he heals he'll come up and put a load of gravel on my parking area---no he won't not after having 3 hernias repaired. It will be fine. Once the grass starts to grow you will never see it. I am so tired...I didn't get much done but I did a little so at least I did my baby steps. Have a blessed evening friends!
I remember it was about five months after my husband died and it was a windy day and my trash can blew over and newspaper was flying all over my front yard, I did not want it to fly over to the neighbor's yard. I was scooping the newspaper in my arms and some of it was blowing out from under my hold and I remember I became so exhausted running around fetching debris that I found myself sitting along the road crying and screaming. The neighbor drove by I did not recognize him through my tears and asked if everything was okay and I said, "I am okay". My property is over 1/2 acre and that is big enough. I am constantly putting money into it fixing and repairing. I feel at times I am a slave to my house. Most everything seemed overwhelming to me the first 1 1/2 years after he died.
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
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Smilin, that's why I opted for the condo here rather than staying in the house in CO. I couldn't financially do both, and in CO I was 25 minutes from town, deep in the mountains, down dirt back roads on 5 acres of land. I couldn't shovel or snow blow my driveway in winter; the house was two story with a walk-out basement -- scary when you live alone; I had a hot tub, decks, house cleaning (5 BR/ 3 BA) to clean and way too many things for me to take care of, so the condo seemed the better choice. I just wish I had had the financial means to keep both for a year or so until I was thinking clearly, but I couldn't, so three months after Bob died, I was fixing up the CO house in the mountains and selling it. I have severe "donor's remorse" over the things I impulsively trashed, gave away or put up for auction. So many things I wish I could get back, but when you're merging two households, something's gotta give on both ends, and I made some very regretful choices....
Smilin, that's why I opted for the condo here rather than staying in the house in CO. I couldn't financially do both, and in CO I was 25 minutes from town, deep in the mountains, down dirt back roads on 5 acres of land. I couldn't shovel or snow blow my driveway in winter; the house was two story with a walk-out basement -- scary when you live alone; I had a hot tub, decks, house cleaning (5 BR/ 3 BA) to clean and way too many things for me to take care of, so the condo seemed the better choice. I just wish I had had the financial means to keep both for a year or so until I was thinking clearly, but I couldn't, so three months after Bob died, I was fixing up the CO house in the mountains and selling it. I have severe "donor's remorse" over the things I impulsively trashed, gave away or put up for auction. So many things I wish I could get back, but when you're merging two households, something's gotta give on both ends, and I made some very regretful choices....
You and me both, Marcy, but we were blessed that we had a choice at that time. I still regret but try not to dwell and push it out of my mind.
I've done a little of that give away just to have it gone--throw away because at the time it hurt to see it....wish I had thought some of it more but that is done and I can't change it now. I know my kids both think it's not healthy for me to stay out here by myself but I'm really not alone with my critters and good neighbors. I just wish I had some "friends" but that will just take time I suppose. I let the neighbors dogs out for their morning run and I couldn't reset their darn house alarm. Just talked to the and now I think I got it.
I was told not to make any decisions after my DH died for first year. I had 8 men ask if I wanted to sell our truck and the verdict was "no". I never opened my garage door in fear some man would walk by and ask if I wanted to sell any tools. I had a few men ask if I wanted to sell some of my husband's power tools and I said, "NO". Also I own a few guns and I was asked for a year from a neighbor if I wanted to sell them every time he saw me. One man did help me clean and rearrange my garage and I gave him half a truck load of stuff that I would never use. I bought more tools since my husband died and I have to really stay away from Harbor Freight, I did not know I love power tools. I am handy around the house. Thank goodness for You tube. I was afraid I would sell something on impulse.
I had no choice but to sell...as much as I could....sadly I know I did not get what it is worth but it paid bills and fed me and the critters. I have some good honest neighbors thank God for that and they have helped to guide me.
I am having a very sad/bad day. Not sure why---no real reason--guess it just is all a part of it. I keep praying......
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The sun is shining and I did start to clean the entry way--start is the word--now to finish! Not sure why I should even bother as my whole yard is turning into a mud pit from the snow! Oh well I can try to keep up I guess.
Snow would just come off the boots easily and leave no dirty, clumping mud on the floors. I get what you are saying though. I might see my lawn by June or July. 8' of snow is going to take a long time to melt if we ever get to 32°. Haven't had a day above freezing since January some time.