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No donuts! Ha! Today was hard like I figured....imagine a grocery basket over filled with collars, harnesses, leashes all in a huge pile just waiting to be put on the proper hanger with the correct matching numbers. Took me all day. I was seeing double by the time I was done. The boss was so happy he and the other girl put away the big bags of dog food but that takes strength--not using your mind! My eyes are so tired...but that is light duty! This back to back from night to morning working is hard on me but I will do it and hopefully get better with it. I think the time change will help! The weather is outstanding here! Amazing for this time of year but there are storms heading our way again! Tomorrow is whiteys day to see the vet and then I'm off the get some much needed things for the house like house filters. So much to learn...Not sure I like that but I will do it anyhow!
Thanks Dude--I feel your hugs even if it through space--
Thanks for the donuts elkotronics--very thoughtful of you!
I fell asleep at about 6pm and even with getting up several times during the night I think I got a lot of sleep. I was so tired.
Hope all of you are having a lovely Friday!
Went to the hospital hospice run bereavement last night. There are two people who have just started and it is hard to see the open grief. Old times like me can talk about experiences without breaking down, at least most of the time. Hope what I say after a year gives some hope, I try not to emphasize my struggle, share mostly practical experiences that help others calibrate what is "normal" in others. Surely it would be better if I could say after a year I feel a whole lot better and will soon stop participating in the bereavement group. That noted, the man next to me (one of two men present) said he lost his wife 7 years ago. He doesn't say much, and is the only one older than me. I see him at the Senior Center occasionally.
On the Senior Center, I stopped by yesterday to pick up background check papers so the County Government can approve me acting as a Volunteer in the Computer Help for Seniors effort they have. I spent almost an hour talking with the staff person who manages the computer support. I knew him anyway as I have attended several classes on computer stuff in the past. Here again, an effort to reach out and break the ongoing paralysis I have which is manifest in physical symptoms: fatigue.
Today I go from 1/2 dose to full dose on my try of Sertraline (Zoloft), hope it helps. I have read many warnings and a few happy stories about the drug. One is grief isn't mental illness and one shouldn't take this type of medication when it is grief, not clinical depression, mental illness. That said, I know many people in grief use this type medication, hopefully on a temporary basis. My doctor thinks it is a reasonable aid for me to try. Sadly, an early side effect can be fatigue... so that's my key on continuing or stopping in the coming week or so. Have to give the body time to adjust, if not the medication isn't effective. Hope it doesn't require a long time to taper off the medication when that time comes, especially if I quite because I am worse.
Jerry, each person is of course different but tapering off Zoloft was much easier then other anti depressants I have had to stop. I'm have a very hard time tapering off my anxiety medication--not easy and then again maybe I am not ready yet. It's great you are trying to get involved even more then you already are. That is the right direction or so I have been told!
cyn, thanks on the Zoloft experience. I am of a mind that I can quite when needed/ready. I quit smoking after 30 years, and "cold turkey" no medications of any kind. Had I not done that I doubt I'd be here today. My wife led the charge of stopping, We had two children and my wife quite several years before I did.. which meant not much smoking by me around the family. I know that helped me quit.
I was at the shelter this morning, and I think I may feel a little less fatigue today.. hope that's a sign I'm adjusting to Zoloft. Here I'm talking how my body feels, there is no change in my mental ruminations that I can claim. I will go to the Senior Center this afternoon to turn in my background check information required before being able to officially volunteer in computer help. That means I'm on a roll to day, heck, may even sleep better tonight, that would be nice.
Jerry the mental changes are very subtle and should really not be very noticeable. My body just does not like many medications and I guess that is a good thing. Wish it hadn't liked the Ativan that I am currently taking. These are really hard to taper down. I have several friends that take antidepressants and are happy with them. I honestly wish my body would accept them but I suppose there is a reason it doesn't. My grandma always told me to listen to my body it tells you what you need and don't need--she lived to be 94 years old!
And don't eat microwave popcorn - I saw this on Dr.Oz. There's something in the stuff that lines the bag that apparently gives you lung cancer. He suggests taking a brown paper bag, filling it with popcorn seeds and microwaving it for 2 minutes. Just fold down the top a little bit before microwaving. Then melt some butter, shaker some salt in the bag and just shake it all up. Voila! Delicious popcorn safe from the chemicals that line the bag that cause lung cancer.
Some of the people working in the factory making the microwave popcorn have gotten lung cancer. It's kind of one of those things that you have to just think about and do what you think is right.
Wow--who would think something like that would be allowed!
It is flat out hot here today..muggy..am considering trying the a/c. I did just put in the new filters. The lady at Lowes said the guys who repair heaters and a/c units told her that the simple cheap flat filters are the best and just change them each month. They don't restrict as much air. So that is what I got!
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