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I want to thank all of you for your supportive comments. today is the 13th day after he passed. in some ways it feels like yesterday and in some ways I feel like an eternity has passed. it's like i've stepped outside of who I was and I don't know where to look to find the pieces to put my life back together.
I went to my doctor today. my driving is terrible. I can't seem to concentrate. ever since this happened, and in the hospital too, i've been nausaus and my head hurts like rubber bands are around it even taking tylenol every 4-6 hours and a couple of times I've had a breakout of hives. the doctor talked to me for a while and gave me ativan. I've never needed prescription meds for anything and the strongest thing I've ever taken is a tylenol or motrin. when I got home I took one and made some peppermint tea with sugar and milk in it. I napped in the lazyboy for a couple hours watching old shows on retro tv. the medication must be wearing off though because I'm crying again and my head hurts.
I want to thank all of you for your supportive comments. today is the 13th day after he passed. in some ways it feels like yesterday and in some ways I feel like an eternity has passed. it's like i've stepped outside of who I was and I don't know where to look to find the pieces to put my life back together.
I went to my doctor today. my driving is terrible. I can't seem to concentrate. ever since this happened, and in the hospital too, i've been nausaus and my head hurts like rubber bands are around it even taking tylenol every 4-6 hours and a couple of times I've had a breakout of hives. the doctor talked to me for a while and gave me ativan. I've never needed prescription meds for anything and the strongest thing I've ever taken is a tylenol or motrin. when I got home I took one and made some peppermint tea with sugar and milk in it. I napped in the lazyboy for a couple hours watching old shows on retro tv. the medication must be wearing off though because I'm crying again and my head hurts.
Don't forget to drink lots of water, karenkaye. Liquids don't act in the body the same as water even if what you drink is mostly water (coffee, tea). I learned that the hard way when I had an operation. What is ativin for?
It's so soon for you. It is almost 3 years for me and at times it feels like only yesterday yet so long ago. Rest as much as you can. Be good to yourself. My sympathies to you. (((hugs)))
I want to thank all of you for your supportive comments. today is the 13th day after he passed. in some ways it feels like yesterday and in some ways I feel like an eternity has passed. it's like i've stepped outside of who I was and I don't know where to look to find the pieces to put my life back together.
I went to my doctor today. my driving is terrible. I can't seem to concentrate. ever since this happened, and in the hospital too, i've been nausaus and my head hurts like rubber bands are around it even taking tylenol every 4-6 hours and a couple of times I've had a breakout of hives. the doctor talked to me for a while and gave me ativan. I've never needed prescription meds for anything and the strongest thing I've ever taken is a tylenol or motrin. when I got home I took one and made some peppermint tea with sugar and milk in it. I napped in the lazyboy for a couple hours watching old shows on retro tv. the medication must be wearing off though because I'm crying again and my head hurts.
thank you all for listening.
I remember that. I was a menace for quite a while. My husband's friend drove me around for a week. After that, my nephew visited for ten days and I asked him to drive. Then, my sister visited for two weeks. She drove. I was afraid I was going to injure or kill someone. Things didn't improve for a while. I blew a few stop signs. I didn't have to drive rush hour traffic to a job, and I could go out at off peak hours to run errands. Scary when you think about it.
for those of you that have been through this, is there hope of ever functioning normally again, when facing the reality that normal has forever been altered? I'm 55 and we were married 20 years.
I am so sorry........
Please just try to take it day by day,dont do things you dont want to.... (Open the mail,etc)
I am truly sorry to hear about this! Be strong! My aunt went through the same, yes you will be fine but it takes time for you to bounce back. My aunt lost her husband on the night before there 25th wedding anniversary 10 years ago. Uncle passed away on his sleeping bed due to a silent heart attack. She was under a shock for some time. She was mute, blind, and deaf due to the shock, but now she is doing okay. It took some time to heal and recover from the pain.
I was 56 and had been married for 37 years. H went to visit relatives for the holidays and dropped dead at 61. No warning. Just gone. Very similar to your situation. No hospital, no goodbyes.
One thing that saved me was we had discussed death and the fact that someday there would be only one of us left. We had agreed it was job one for whomever was still on the planet to have the best possible rest of their life. Take the do-over and have a whole new different life. We had both experienced too much death and saw people literally give up the rest of their lives to misery and grieving. We didn't want to be like them.
I'm still alive. Yes, I still think of him every day. A bit more on holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, etc. And it's not always sad, death related thoughts. Lots of times I remember the good times we shared. Every now and then I come across something he would love and I still think for a split second I need to remember to tell him about it. And even now I still get phone calls and mail for him. I don't think that will ever stop.
Time passes and I have a great new life. I am loving every minute of it and it has been like a do-over. I am the merry widow I promised him I would be.
My aunt had the same thought...but she eventually moved on and is as happy as she was when she was married. You would never know it from the wake and funeral though. She was put on Heavy medication to survive the ordeal, and even shook the casket vigorously to try and shake him awake....the funeral was worse. But now she is fine, and happy, and calm. It takes time....we just met another woman who works with my mother who said "Every night she speaks to her husband and tells him. "She will be there soon. As she has no means to live alone without him." She keeps asking God to take her so she won't be alone. It is a process...and yes, you will eventually surround yourself with all the good memories of those 20 years and will smile.
I was 56 and had been married for 37 years. H went to visit relatives for the holidays and dropped dead at 61. No warning. Just gone. Very similar to your situation. No hospital, no goodbyes.
One thing that saved me was we had discussed death and the fact that someday there would be only one of us left. We had agreed it was job one for whomever was still on the planet to have the best possible rest of their life. Take the do-over and have a whole new different life. We had both experienced too much death and saw people literally give up the rest of their lives to misery and grieving. We didn't want to be like them.
I'm still alive. Yes, I still think of him every day. A bit more on holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, etc. And it's not always sad, death related thoughts. Lots of times I remember the good times we shared. Every now and then I come across something he would love and I still think for a split second I need to remember to tell him about it. And even now I still get phone calls and mail for him. I don't think that will ever stop.
Time passes and I have a great new life. I am loving every minute of it and it has been like a do-over. I am the merry widow I promised him I would be.
This is beautiful !!!
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