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I know everyone deals with grief in their own way. One person’s way may seem odd to others but it is their way to come to terms with the loss of a loved one. When my mother passed away in July 2008 I wanted my granddaughter and nephew to take part in celebrating her life. To that end, it was decided to take one of my mothers prized collectables a stuffed clown named “Peggy” and try to send her around the world and have others adopt her and help her along the journey. Peggy was left behind after our trip to Salt Lake City for others to adopt. We made videos and posted them on YouTube and hope others who find “Peggy” will do the same. Making these videos helped in my healing process and it will help my granddaughter and nephew be part of their grandmothers life for years to come. If you are touched by any of the videos on YouTube forward them on, so Peggy's journey will continue. My granddaughter and nephew can track her trip by seeing which country the videos seen in.
This is what helped me along my path of recovery. What funny, sad or odd way did you deal with your grief?
To see one of the videos use this link to see”
“Peggy Goes to Salt Lake City and surrounding area”
No matter how old you are when a parent dies, you feel orphaned. That's just the way it is.
Thankfully, my mom is still living. My dad died 12 years ago--it was awful.. But, it's the way life goes....nothing you can do about it. You grieve, you cry, and you keep living.
I miss him, but I've learned to live with the loss.
FondFamily Memories,
What a wonderful thing to do. I know your mother would have been proud, and you are giving your granddaughter and nephew something priceless.
When my father passed away, I just kept thinking how lucky I was to have had him in my life for as long as I did and remembering the good times with him. I still miss him, but at least I had him for awhile.
Watching my mother die was the most beautiful experience I've ever witnessed in my life. The birth of my children would have been - but I was in so much agony and pain- wanted it over with.
But my mother, wow! Some woman! She was on hospice and she asked me to move in with her this summer so she wouldn't have to go to a nursing home. I watched her deteriorate and watched as her body died.
The night before she died something told me this would be her last night. I had turned off the tv days prior and turned on her fav radio station. I turned the tv on to the tv guide channel -volume off-and put a towel over the tv screen except for the clock part of the screen. (wanted to know the time day or night)
The next day she was tense- like a brick. She had gone into the head going back to open her breathing path. But when she started taking the shallow breaths and then her final - she relaxed like I had never seen in all my 38 years. She went to sleep. My mother saw Jesus at 1:11pm on October 6th, 2008.
I'm crying as I write this as I miss my mother so much. I do feel orphaned and when the parents pass away - we are next! I so want to go with her, to that better place. But I know my work on earth isn't finished.
How I deal with it? I anticipate being in her arms again.
I seperate myself from others, I like to be alone. When my 1st grandfather died my sister took me out to lunch and kept asking when I was going to cry. I did it after she left. When my second grandfather died my family wanted to hug and cry in a group and I just sat their motionless and expressionless. I just prefer to be alone...
My Mom died in 1999 and I still miss her every day. I still talk to her and buy a gift for her every now and then, a what-not that I see that I know she would like. I know she is with me ever day but I never stop missing her.
Mom died of cancer and we kept her at home. Me and my sister took care of her until the end. Hospice wasn't called in until 3 days before she died. Taking care of Mama as she was dying was some of the best times she and I ever had. I would get in the shower with her and we would act like a couple of kids in there and have a ball. We would sit on the porch in the evening and talk about things, kid and joke with each other. She told me many times she had a great life and was ready to "go". I would discuss her dying with her openly (where my sister couldn't), I pre-arranged her service and told her what I had planned for her and where we were going to bury her and she got excited that she was going to be close to my brother who had died several years before. Those were some of the best times we ever had and we were closer than we ever were.
I still have Mama's cat that she loved dearly and feel like I still have a piece of Mama's heart with me. Boo stayed by her side until the end and was laying on her chest when she died. We had to remove her when they came to take Mama away and I talk to her about Mama all the time.
Nothing in life prepares you for the loss of your parent but I do not grieve for that loss. I was at peace with her dying and her death.... I just miss her!
What you did was a great idea! I know she is looking down, laughing her butt off at what you are doing bragging "That's my baby!"
I threw myself into my work. It was my last semester of grad school. I couldn't afford to slow down. I had no desire to go to the funeral or wake. I only went because I was worried about my grandmother's grief of outliving her youngest child. I've had other close family members die since then and have not and will not go to another funeral. I hope I don't outlive my husband and son, because I won't go to theirs either. I clearly don't deal with grief well.
if you spend alota time with the family member in their care and attendance b4 death you dont have to process massive emotions they dont for the most part happen.
the ones that get tormented are not the son or daughter that is there til the end, its the others that show up for the funeral.
lots and lots of processing for them.
this is much more difficult.
When my mom died it was Christmas Eve. This made it that much harder. Her death was expected, as she had battled lung ca. It was hard on the kids, this year makes 8 years.
Starting the next Christmas Eve, I made a Grandma Shirley cake, for celebration of her moving on, a Jesus' birthday cake.
I did it every year. This year I dont know.
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