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Perhaps you're right, GCguy. But don't you think it unfair to those who might not fit the stereotype to be judged based upon that particular sterotype whether it be derogatory or not?
Example: A good friend of mine who happens to be Asian, is always assumed to be a whiz at math when in fact he's terrible at it and his grades in school proved it. Or all Asians are excellent students; he just barely got passing grades in school and he studied just as much as the rest of us. He's the nicest guy in the world but just doesn't fit the stereotype that all Asians are good at math or good students. It aggravates him that people so easily put that label on him. Sure, it's not derogatory but unfair nonetheless.
It's the inherent definition of a bigot when one uses sterotypes to judge a whole group of people based upon the perception of the characteristics generally portrayed by that group. In my opinion, anyway.
Thanks.
--'rocco
Of course everyone does not fit a stereotype. But the dismiss stereotypes out of hand and act like anyone that references one is Grand Wizard of the KKK is not fair either.
Of course everyone does not fit a stereotype. But the dismiss stereotypes out of hand and act like anyone that references one is Grand Wizard of the KKK is not fair either.
Whenever you complain negatively about what some minority is doing or wants to accomplish your going to get called “racist”.
It comes with the territory just ignore it.
As said earlier schools and colleges teach this rubbish and we all know what types run them
Bottom line- - If multiculturalism is so good why are over 90% of homeowners on Long Island against it ?
Partly because the pay a lot of $$$ to live here and dont want there neighborhoods ruened by people who wish to bring extentions of there home countrys and oddball lifestyles here.
Long Islanders are not racists --just protective. Most moved here to get away from a city that was bankrupt and destroyed in 10 years after the immigration act of 1965 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immigra...ty_Act_of_1965. Who needs to go through that again ?
If folks want bigtime multiculturism they should try area's Los Angelos, San Fransisco, Boston or Denver.
I am irish, but live in a development that has all kinds of people. However, we are in a fire district that is a certain race. When all of the people starting complaining about the high taxes we pay to the district ; it happens to be one of the highest taxes in Suffolk County, we were called racist.
Hello there ; we arent racist at all ; not one bit. We are just fed up with paying a fortune to the fire district. The other side plays the race card way to much.
dorothy
I think GCGuy has a point, and the racism works both ways. Asians can be very racist as well...
I recommend watching 'Avenue Q' one day...and I am certain you will find the song 'Everyone's a Little Bit Racist' somewhat enlightening.
Yea seriously. Infact ive found alot of Asains especially in the New York area to be extremley racist especially towards Blacks and Jews. Now im not making generalization but I think its extremely rude of you to generalize people from Long Island. And I really doubt that you got funny looks when people met you. Its not like Long Island is a third world country and they have never seen a diverse population. Grow up.
Glad2Bhere i am very sorry that you view indians to be generally rude and find that they do not have a lot of social skills or manners when it comes to venturing into a public place. i am assuming from sensing the amount of frustration that you must have run into these situations more then once that it has led you to view a whole society as being rude. as an indian i am going to apologise on behalf of anyone who comes from india or looks indian who did not hold the door open for you.
i also do think that the next time you run into a situation like that please say something. societies or people do not correct themselves on their own all the time. unfortunately as human beings we have to learn almost everything, so correct them once may be tell them the proper way and i am sure( knowing my culture) that they will adapt.
just remember that you are kind to people because most likely you are a very kind person, dont be kind and courteous beacaus you want to show someone that you are courteous. so next time you go to a public place and hold the door open for someone, do it without expectations. i am sure that people you have held the doors open for learned from you and most likely did the same for others the next time around. its just that, most likely you would never get to see that and get satisfaction.
my wife and i are moving to NHP in about 2 months and hopefully you will run into us or any of our family members who i am sure will be visiting us a lot. you will definitely have indians opening the doors for you and more. may be that will change your harsh views about people from one of the oldest civilizations in the world.
mom2gurls:
i am very sorry that you being an indian find indians offensive and rude. i have been in us for almost 12 years now and offcourse know a lot of indian people. i will tell you that 2 things i have never seen, i have never met a child born and raised here who actually has an indian accent. infact most of these indian american kids thought very lowly of india( and tried their very best to not look indian) till few years ago when all of a sudden the whole world woke up to all the outsourced jobs and a vibrant indian economy. it sort of makes me feel good that it took away one thing that the indian american kids always used to put down india.
the second thing i have never seen and i can personaly vouch for north indians that i have never seen 20 people crammed into one house. i am sure there are families who live together as they do in indian society. i do not know where in india you come from, may you come from a professional family living in a city or may be a military family etc but about in 90% of india most families live together in the same house. the parents live with the kids, they do their best for the children when children need them and then children take care of them when they cant do it on thier own( thats why you dont have assisted living in india, not proportional to the populations anyway). brothers also may live together in a subdivided house. so if they live together here in a 2-3 family house then it should not be a problem for anyone. however if they all live in one room then that is not right or healthy. actually if you look around indians as a community we have one of the highest ratios in home ownership as an immigrant society. we are very hard working people who like their own food and i am very sorry that the smell of curry may be offensive to a lot of people. however just because they have come to us does not mean that they should marry a hamburger or pasta and unfortunately you cant cook indian food without spices and the aroma.
i do beleive that they should have a mix of culture. learn everything about your adopted society and not forget your roots. may be they dont want or let their kids be "too americanized" not because of a fear of rebellion but from the fear of loosing sight of their culture and their roots. may be they dont learn emglish not because they dont want to but beacuse they cant afford to because most of these newly arrived immigrants work 12-14-16 hours a day to make ends meet. not every one walks off the plane with money in india backing them up, or a well settled relative in us awaiting them on the other side or most of them lack the basic education. and obviously you know how difficult life can be when you start from scratch in a foreign country and a different society. but you should be proud of them that in a very short time they have established themselves, go into a hospital and look around you will see many indian doctors and nurses, try MTA and i personaly know few engineers who are from india, try con edison,try the IT department of your place of work. i also beleive that its our duty as being indians to teach the new comers how to venture in a new society. so next time hopefully when you run into one of those awkward situations try showing them what the right way is. may be then you would not have to skip jackson heights.
Last edited by Keeper; 03-23-2008 at 01:51 PM..
Reason: change name
Yeah I think most Indian people in this area aren't trying to be rude, but certainly some do come across that way. This is mostly due to cultural differences betwen America and Asia.
People on the whole in East Asia & South Asia are more brusque than people are in America. I guess we would act the same way if all areas of America were as densely packed as most cities in East Asia and South Asia are.
The door holding thing is a big difference between America and most Asian societies. They just don't do it over there. The general practice is to just throw open the door and the person behind you has to fend for themselves. So people who do this are probably being more of a FOB than they are being rude.
I have actually met a few Desi people who were either born here or were born in a South Asia, lived there for 1-4 years, and then moved to the USA and have a slight accent. In all of these cases though at least one member of the family (usually the mother) was unable to speak any English at all. This of course is the exception rather than the rule.
People in China actually find it amusing when you try to act polite like an American over in China. See what happens after saying thanks ("xie xie") a couple of times to a person who is helping you in China, as you would in America. Usually they'll think that you're some source of amusement.
Yeah I think most Indian people in this area aren't trying to be rude, but certainly some do come across that way. This is mostly due to cultural differences betwen America and Asia.
People on the whole in East Asia & South Asia are more brusque than people are in America. I guess we would act the same way if all areas of America were as densely packed as most cities in East Asia and South Asia are.
The door holding thing is a big difference between America and most Asian societies. They just don't do it over there. The general practice is to just throw open the door and the person behind you has to fend for themselves. So people who do this are probably being more of a FOB than they are being rude.
I have actually met a few Desi people who were either born here or were born in a South Asia, lived there for 1-4 years, and then moved to the USA and have a slight accent. In all of these cases though at least one member of the family (usually the mother) was unable to speak any English at all. This of course is the exception rather than the rule.
People in China actually find it amusing when you try to act polite like an American over in China. See what happens after saying thanks ("xie xie") a couple of times to a person who is helping you in China, as you would in America. Usually they'll think that you're some source of amusement.
Thank you...I love the way people read so much into other peoples post so much that defense mechanisms go up. MEAD....your right its a cultural issue..and an issue of cultural protocol. My folks came back and my in-laws came her with the same story...200 dollars in their pocket, all from professional families and the family back home to support them in their transition. They adapted and learned very quickly the language, culture and customs and instilled good values in us LIKE EVERY parent does...there are no cultural barriers to good parenting.
And at home we followed our own customs and traditions and I was actively involved in my temple growing up and am raising my children to be active in their faith and also explore other faiths so they find "their groove".
And to the other poster LI2B..thats great that you have a strong opinion about our culture...alot of points you make are correct. But I must respectfully differ in that...unless you were brought up her...I mean literally..not just immigrated 10-12 years ago..and went thru the schooling system from, well kindergarten..you may not fully understand the little nuiances of comming from a different culture..things were MUCH MUCH different back in the 70/80's....for ALL cultures.
I AM NORTH indian..and can vouch for that as well..that there I have not seen it happen..but as YOU know their are many many different sub cultures of india..each with their quirks..so I am not going to define our culture even further.
Their are the FOB's that I have met..who complain, that "nothing is free here, boo hooo I dont have my staff of servants, where is my driver, I actually HAVE to work (moms)".. and I am like...just go back home then...quit your whining, earn a living and make something of yourself.
That is the beauty of this country, is that they do indeed say, there is nothing wrong with a hard days work. I just dont get the FOB mentality.
And yes..count my father and FIL in the genre of being an engineer and my brother being a doctor and my dh in exec management in IT..and both me and mom and MIL..both worked and were proud of it.
Its shame that racism exists but there are problems with all cultures....
Agreed, from my experience a lot of this asians are rude thing is just a difference in the cultures. American culture is just more polite, at least amongst strangers. But this is why it is important not to lump people into general groups. I've met plenty of second, third-generation Asian-Americans that are extremely Americanized. People have a tendency to lump so called FOB'ers with people who were born here or have family dating back here for years.
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