Ppl from Massachusetts are incredibly rude (Boston, Marblehead: houses, schools, maintenance)

[fashionablecowboy]

I haven't been to many states where I have experienced such a rude vibe. Massachusetts, however, certainly feels like one of them. I could never grasp how horrible and self-centered the drivers were even when there was NO traffic! I found many people to be cold and unpersonable. Although, some people were helpful.. sure, some were very genuine, but NO ONE WOULD EVER start a conversation about their personal life, unless you were a long-time friend, relative, or direct family member.

I am not alone in my complaint against Mass. Ask most people from Carolinas, Texas, or other "friendlier" and warmer environments. What do you think causes this massive perception about people from Massachusetts? Is it the cold winters?.. For you Mass residents: How many times a day does a random person greet you with a large smile and ask you how your day was?

MA is a very safe and educated area so why are people so mean!?

[ontheroad]

Not my experience. Never been my experience.

And if you call folks names here, perhaps you brought in an attitude -- and as I've just traveled through more than a dozen states, I can't say I found anyone in Texas more friendly or PA, or KY, or WVA.

I've only met a handful of not helpful folk, and they wouldn't be helpful or friendly if they lived anywhere.

PS - And btw, when I lived in Western MA, every single person that passed me said hello, and many asked how my days was and shared theirs.

[vter]

I grew up and currently live in Vermont, but lived in greater Boston for 6 years. Compared to Vermont, I found Mass folks to be less friendly (i.e. people are more apt to indulge in small talk up here)..BUT...I think it's just really a New England thing. New Englanders are reserved folks, but once you get to know them (us), they're great. I think it also has to do a little with population density - in cities, more people crammed together = more opportunities to be annoyed IMO.
I do however, have to agree with you regarding drivers. Yowzers! I got used to it though

[ChunkyMonkey]

When I lived in Georgia, a warm and friendly state, and my car engine died while waiting at the light. The car behind me starting honking and then actually purposely bump me. I was so angry. I got out of my car, took a long time looking around my back bumper but did not look at the driver in the face. I have never had that experience living in Massachusetts. So, be careful about your stereotypes. Everyone experiences things differently, there are rude people everywhere.

[momoffive]

i don't think .. no matter where you are ... people should "start a conversaion about their peronal life... "hey, guess what?? my bones ache, i'm getting old my husbands cheating and my kids hate me""..... wouldn't you turn and run???

[deepblue]

I've lived in Massachusetts for more than 15 years and I can say that I have met some of the best people I've ever met in life in who are educated, intelligent, and respectful for other cultures. But at the same time I can safely say that I've also encountered some of the worst people I'll ever meet as well. People who are rude and hateful, arrogant yet ignorant, and so insecure and miserable in the failures of their own lives that they have to belittle other people to feel temporarily better. After visiting other states such as Virginia, N. Carolina, and Texas, I was really surprised to find populations of people who are warm and friendly and it just makes me feel ashamed for those "Bostonians" who proudly takes rudeness and racial bigotry as a "mark of tradition" for Massachusettites and New England people in general. But at the same I reazlied something - Massachusetts has a reputation for being the haven for rude and prejudiced people and that will not change because that has been the way of life for so long. In a way it is a "necessary evil" to balance out the more friendly/open-minded states in the U.S. because every person, at the same of time being entitled of free speech etc, is entitled to be ignorant and spiteful - it's a personal choice and a way of life which cannot be stifled because that hateful energy will only manifest in other ways (perhaps more destructive ways). The saying "without darkness there can't be light" rings true.

[OREGONRAIN]

I am from Mass, and have lived in Oregon for 2 years, I always thought Mass was kind of rude, but I also felt friendships lasted much longer there. I have found there is rudeness everywhere, here in Portland also, its not just Mass. I think you might notice it there so much, because Massachusetts is so densely populated. However I still think Mass has the worst drivers I ever encounted except for maybe Florida.

[joppa]

I think it might be a little unfair to say that Boston is unfriendly. Coming from the UK and having worked for an American company based in MA, I found it nothing more than the friendlist place I could ever wish for. You want cold and unfriendly try London, UK.

[baystater]

This was originally written by hilliegal 05-06-2007, 11:49 AM. Under the titled fitting in.

Believe this sums up the New England Attitude.



"I speak for Northern New England when I say the follow because I live there. So if anyone disagrees with what I say, it may be because they live in a different region of New England so here goes:
Understand that our roots are English. Visit or live a short time in a local English village and you will see where the New England mentality comes from.
We New Englanders are polite and gracious to the new people, but we keep them at arms length until we know them better. Don't expect to be invited to their home on meeting them the first time. I'm sure this makes it hard for any new kid in school. After a year and a half, though(depending on where you live in New England) your kid will be considered one of the pack.
The parents? Well...it may take a little longer depending if you and your kid get involved in the local community."

"Three things to consider when living in New England
1. like the English, we don't like and are suspicious of change. WE DON'T LIKE CHANGE.
So New Englanders look to see if you are willing to commit to New England for the long run. That's a big thing. We don't open up to just anybody cause we take our friendships VERY seriously. When we commit to a deep friendship, it's usually for a lifetime even if one of you moves away or don't see each other for months at a time.We run very deep and very sentimental-like our English ancestors.
Alot of people joke that, in northern New England, you have to move there and have a kid growing up in the schools in order to be accepted. If you don't have a kid, you could be kept at arms length for much longer-years---unless you join local clubs through someone you become frineds with locally. Then they will wonder when you WILL have kids.
But once you have a kid in the local school or community system and you get them and you involved with your community, then they start accepting you more on a personal level. After all, your child will be growing up a Yankee. If you are willing to commit to having your kid grow up as a Yankee, then they accept you. You have to prove yourself to New Englanders. Not because they are snobs, but because we don't open up to people easily.Once we do, you can depend on us for anything. Again, it's an English throwback thing."

"2. We have a "clan" mentality and it's a matter of trust.
We definitely have a circling wagons mentality. We like to have stangers introduced to us through someone we trust. This comes out in buckets when the economy gets bad like it is now. So it makes it worst for anybody moving here or a person not affiliated with community or professional organizations. Again I speak from experience about more suburban and rural areas.
But you do see this mentality even in Boston. That's why Boston is considered a "town"and not a city in people's minds because of this mentality. It's "who you know", Where you go to school and where you live is important.
But if you have manners(BIIIIIIIIG THING) and dress well(LL Bean, Coldwater Creek-pretty and functional) on a daily basis, (Stiletto heals and tight fitting clothes on a daily basis will place you in a certain category you don't want to be in for economic maintenance or advancement--my sister-in- law learned this coming from FL and has adjusted quite nicely, thank you) and have a quiet confidence about you(not pushy and loud boasting which New Englanders HATE), they will accept and respect you sometimes in spite of where you come from.
Draw attention to yourself in public like yelling and flailing your arms about when mad and you will see New Englanders run for cover, even your New England friends. You see, We don't like attention drawn to ourselves. We get embarrassed---again, like our English cousins. Of course, we are too polite to berate you about your behavior afterwards"

"3.Don't get us riled. We supress alot of our frustrations and passions. We were always the one breaking the King's peace, remember?
Try to change something we want kept the way it is and you will see a reaction that may set your teeth chattering for months, even years.
Ritual, ceremonies and constancy are a BIIIIG thing in New England just like our English ancestors. Rich in history that we keep and are surrounded by in our 2-300 year old houses, our old ballparks, our covered bridges and old family farms. It's a sourse of comfort to us in a changing ever shrinking world.
It's all a matter of assimilation. If you want to live in Marblehead, for example, you have to see how they dress, how they paint and landscape their houses and which clubs they join and do it. It will get you in much faster. It's not about standing out. It's about fitting in. It's VERY important in New England. this gets you a quicker ticket to acceptance. Don't come charging in trying to change things. Assimilate first and show respect for our traditions then if you think outside the box but stay within the circle, we will listen and accept you politely and will defend your right to think that way to the point of blood drawing.. Won't change though....sorry"


"There's lots more about New England I could point out to you. But it's very rewarding to live here for this reason.You feel part of a bigger whole which everybody craves. You feel you belong somewhere. New England has a sense of place because we've been here for so long. Our ancestor's blood is blended in the soil. This is why people move back to New England when they moved away in their youth
Suburban and Rural areas of America are like this everywhere I'm sure but these are things I have noticed about us New Englanders
Hope this helps"

[MAtoNC!]

MA is a very safe and educated area so why are people so mean!?

Because of people like you that call us "Masssholes" and use run on sentences. You need to use a period after the word area. It would make your post easier to read.