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Hey Skywalker14, maybe you need to examine yourself as why you target "crazy" women.
The "White Knight" syndrome most likely. I think they can be fixed. But to be honest it only happened twice. The last time (the "loose cannon" incident) took me by surprise.
"Bipolar" is the most overused label, along with ADHD. That will e left out of this post.
What I hear is an attraction to to women who will never give you what you're looking for.
IOW, You are attracted to women who are "unavailable". Is that perhaps because you too are "unavailable" for the kind of relationship you say you want?
You state that you clearly see the 'red flags' that indicate its never going to work, but you are unable to heed the warning. Hmm.. what's that about?..
Well, they are fun and exciting, and that carries a huge rush with it ---in the beginning. Its the best feeling in the world, huh? But that doesn't last, and real relationships are built on things much deeper than a rush.
Also, her history of abusive relationships did not make you run, instead they brought out the "rescuer" in you, that you could show her a better way, and she would love you for helping her.
This is about you.. About your attraction to fun and excitement, about your attraction to wounded people, about your belief that you could help them, fix them, and have the kind of lasting, healthy relationship you are looking for.
Healthy people looking for a lasting relationship don't ignore the signs that clearly indicate failure.
A wounded person can't be fixed by you.
You need to figure out why you are attracted to these kind of women who are 'master manipulators', etc.
My guess is that you're attracted to the rush, that you are an "excitement junkie".
You need to figure out if you really even want a long-term relationship, and then consider if you are actually 'relationship material'.
Trust me, this is about you, not her.
Lets just say this comes from experience. There came a time that my 'clock was ticking', and I was sad because I knew that if I was going to have a baby, I had to have a partner who was capable of being a good father, and someone who was going to stick around for long haul of life. "Father material", I called it. Problem was, I was not attracted to what I thought of as the 'insurance agent' kind of guy. Borrrrring!!
Then I considered having a baby on my own. Then my friend visited with her baby, and it was like "make that thing stop!" Then I started realizing I never really liked kids much, lol, in fact, never really liked being a kid much. I liked the freedom of being an adult.
Then I thought, hmm "if I don't want to have kids, then I don't really need to have a partner who is "father material". Come to think of it, I don't know why he even needs to be "marriage material". Come to think of it....
IM NOT MARRIAGE MATERIAL!
From that, I realized I never really believed in 'till death do you part'...
I'm a free spirit! And I'm attracted to the very same thing!
And all has been well since I figured that out.
I realized that a lot of it was the myths we live by: the "white picket fence", and "happily ever after".
I realized that never really was me.
If I want a long lasting relationship, I know I have a lot to learn.
Good luck in figuring yourself out, and recognizing what you really want. Because my guess is that you've passed on girls who had it to give, but they lacked the thrill of the other 'master manipulators'.
We, girls used to laugh about how we picked those kind and said "but he has so much potential!" Haha, what we were saying is "wait till I get my hands on him. I can change him into exactly what I want!"
You can't change someone, and you shouldn't try. Enjoy people for who they are, but keep your eyes open! We all deserve the best!
"Bipolar" is the most overused label, along with ADHD. That will e left out of this post.
What I hear is an attraction to to women who will never give you what you're looking for.
IOW, You are attracted to women who are "unavailable". Is that perhaps because you too are "unavailable" for the kind of relationship you say you want?
You state that you clearly see the 'red flags' that indicate its never going to work, but you are unable to heed the warning. Hmm.. what's that about?..
Well, they are fun and exciting, and that carries a huge rush with it ---in the beginning. Its the best feeling in the world, huh? But that doesn't last, and real relationships are built on things much deeper than a rush.
Also, her history of abusive relationships did not make you run, instead they brought out the "rescuer" in you, that you could show her a better way, and she would love you for helping her.
This is about you.. About your attraction to fun and excitement, about your attraction to wounded people, about your belief that you could help them, fix them, and have the kind of lasting, healthy relationship you are looking for.
Healthy people looking for a lasting relationship don't ignore the signs that clearly indicate failure.
A wounded person can't be fixed by you.
You need to figure out why you are attracted to these kind of women who are 'master manipulators', etc.
My guess is that you're attracted to the rush, that you are an "excitement junkie".
You need to figure out if you really even want a long-term relationship, and then consider if you are actually 'relationship material'.
Trust me, this is about you, not her.
Lets just say this comes from experience. There came a time that my 'clock was ticking', and I was sad because I knew that if I was going to have a baby, I had to have a partner who was capable of being a good father, and someone who was going to stick around for long haul of life. "Father material", I called it. Problem was, I was not attracted to what I thought of as the 'insurance agent' kind of guy. Borrrrring!!
Then I considered having a baby on my own. Then my friend visited with her baby, and it was like "make that thing stop!" Then I started realizing I never really liked kids much, lol, in fact, never really liked being a kid much. I liked the freedom of being an adult.
Then I thought, hmm "if I don't want to have kids, then I don't really need to have a partner who is "father material". Come to think of it, I don't know why he even needs to be "marriage material". Come to think of it....
IM NOT MARRIAGE MATERIAL!
From that, I realized I never really believed in 'till death do you part'...
I'm a free spirit! And I'm attracted to the very same thing!
And all has been well since I figured that out.
I realized that a lot of it was the myths we live by: the "white picket fence", and "happily ever after".
I realized that never really was me.
If I want a long lasting relationship, I know I have a lot to learn.
Good luck in figuring yourself out, and recognizing what you really want. Because my guess is that you've passed on girls who had it to give, but they lacked the thrill of the other 'master manipulators'.
We, girls used to laugh about how we picked those kind and said "but he has so much potential!" Haha, what we were saying is "wait till I get my hands on him. I can change him into exactly what I want!"
You can't change someone, and you shouldn't try. Enjoy people for who they are, but keep your eyes open! We all deserve the best!
Interesting reply but I must say the following:
1. This only happened to me once really with "the loose cannon" incident. The other one I mentioned was just a date which went seriously wrong. But really only happened to me once with a woman I never suspected there was something really wrong with her until I saw the episode. And believe me it wasnt pretty.
2. Your point however is interesting, we like the thrill of the chase. We want what we cannot have so to speak.
3. Bipolar is a real condition, not a moody or cranky but just a mental problema.
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