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Do you give yourself credit or praise very often? Is it easy (or hard) for you to accept compliments from other people?...I think I have a fear of becoming arrogant? Do you?...We've always said "good job" to each other in our family and tried to give each other credit and praise and support. Now that I'm alone I forget to say "good job" to myself! (But I remembered to give myself a little praise this morning when I faced some "big fears!" And it felt good!)...My Mom had trouble accepting compliments. Guess she just wanted to remain modest and humble. I'm a lot like this too...But it's rough when someone always "poo-poo's" our compliments. Don't you think?
I have no problem receiving compliments but I don't give myself credit as often as I should. DH is not good at receiving compliments but he's great at giving them. If I tell him he looks handsome he'll say "no I don't" I just tell him"just say thank You ok?"My husband will say Thank you to me especially after we have had people over for dinner. I'll say "Thank you for what?" Then he'll tell me the reason is because the food was great, and that I made the evening lovely for him.
lubby...Great post! Nice that your DH thanks you for cooking special meals and "going the extra mile" for him and everyone!...Really nice to hear! ..My husband was great about accepting compliments. I'm the one who has trouble with it at times...When I tried (or anyone tried) to compliment my Mom on her cooking or a meal she made she'd say: "Oh it just tasted good because you were hungry" or something like that! She wouldn't take the compliment "in." Or maybe she did and she just didn't want to admit it!...My Mom and I always had a "late night" phone conversation after each holiday. We'd compare notes about how everything "went" and how everyone "acted" etc. (My Aunt came to holidays and she could be a "troublemaker!") Anyway I sure miss my Mom. (Even though she had trouble accepting compliments at times.) My Mom was my "best friend" along with my husband and son! Know you are close to your Mom too.
Yes, my mom and my husband are my best friends too. My mom is 66 but you'd never know it because takes pride in how she looks. She'll say things to me like "do I look old"? I tell her no and that she is beautiful and she is.
lubby..I'm glad that your and your Mom are so close and best friends...My son and I are close too. When he was little he was always game to go places with me even though my older son thought it was "dorky" to hang-out with Mom as he got older...My younger son got along with people of all ages. He used to love to walk along the pier and talk to older fisherman. (Learn from them!) ...And he loved to spend time with an older lady across the street and listen to her stories as she crocheted. (She was a widow with no family closeby.)...He insisted that his friends let their younger brothers and sisters "hang-out" in their "group!" He didn't want them to feel like "nothings" or "left-out."...Anyway I guess my younger son is more like me because I enjoyed talking to older people when I was young or kids who were younger than me too...I guess some people don't care about age that much. This is probably why my son felt okay about being close to me and I felt okay about being close to my parents. Is this how you feel too? ...I'm 63 now. Maybe I am one of the oldest people who posts in this section. Not sure! But who cares? Right? Age doesn't matter all that much to me when it comes to making friends or being a friend to others!
I feel the same way, my mom was very close with her parents, her mom unfortunately had Schizophrenia and died at age 57 from a heart attack so I guess you could say her Dad was her best friend, somone she could go to for advice.
I get mad at myself and start to "beat myself up" at times. But eventually a voice inside of me says "knock it off!" And I try to deal with problems in a more constructive way. (Versus "doing drama!" And going off the "deep end" etc.)
lubby...How often do you see and talk to your Mom? I'm glad you are both so close.
I talk to my mom everyday at least 3 times a day (may sound a little obsessive) but we don't feel that way. I call her every morning at her job around 11am then I talk to her one time in the afternoon (but only if I have something to share) and then again at night around 7:30 pm. She did this with her dad too. We also have a thing that when we get together and we drop her off at home that we call her when we get home. (at night of course)or if I am by myself and go to her house as soon as I walk in the door I call her to say I am ok, day or night. If there is bad weather out like snow or a bad rain storm I tell my mom to call me when she gets in from work. I see my mom at least every other saturday. She works every other saturday so on the saturdays she does not work we get together all day and then go out to a nice dinner with my DH. Every other thursday she has off too and if I don't get called in to my partime job and she's free we may meet for lunch and then I go home. My brother and his family Live in Chicago so we only see them maybe 2 times a year. I have heard alot of people tell me that they wish they had the kind of relationship with their mom like I do. I am very lucky to have her in my life.
To answer your question, no, not at all. I think part of it stems from my cultural heritage where you don't toot your own horn.
BUT, if I had to say I did that in any form it would be "I can't believe I did that," almost as if I'm shocked it happened. I guess my recent move would be an example. I cannot believe I moved myself out of that house with all that stuff completely by myself for the most part (except for the heavy furniture). I packed every box, loaded every box, unloaded every box, and it took every bit of energy I had to do. Many, many years worth of stuff in a big house and I did it all by myself.
HOWEVER, it took me almost two months to recover and I mean I slept on the sofa for almost two months before I got the energy to get the stuff off the bed. So I won't be patting myself on the back too much here.
Suffice to say it's been a major adjustment and the next move I will pay someone to help move those boxes. Of course, the other place has sucked up time and energy (drain) from me so that is probably why it's taken me so long here.
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