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You are not alone with your problem. First off you need to stop feeling the shame. You are and eloquent and obviously a smart human being. The trouble is that being smart has nothing to do with falling prey to an addiction as a coping skill. many smart people have struggled with addiction ( people like George W. Not trying to get political here just saying successful and knowledgeable people have fallen prey to booze). There are even passages in the Bible that lend to the fact that even Noah one of god's chosen men struggled with the bottle. So don't beat yourself up. AA is a wonderful organization and has worked for millions of people that being said it still has a fairly low success rate if you look at the stats. If you are one of the people it works for wonderful but there are many options out there if you make it your job to find out.
One thing that I have read about is that it is a matter of retraining your unconscious mind. Addictions are held in this part of the brain just like other animal like behaviors (meaning survival) your mind thinks without the alcohol you will die, so that primal brain or "Booze Brain" keeps feeding you lies all based around it's own survival.
Check out the principles of Core
1. Commit
2. Objectify
3.Respond
4.Enjoy
It's about retraining your Booze Brain and allowing your conscious mind make the right decisions and disarming the lies the Booze Brain tells you. This is your life and you are worth it! I would do anything possible to save your own life, even hypnosis. That worked for a friend of mine that drank and smoked, he quit and is happier today!
I know it is especially hard when you have other physical ailments I understand because I struggle with Fibromyalgia and Lupis. Woerk closely with a medical DR even if you feel like you are being a pain in the ass. We have to police our own health care in life today. Get honest with them, if they are not understanding and helpful fire them and get a new Doctor. Look up some of Dr Drews advice he has worked as an addiction specialist for years if the 12 step path is not right for you try something else until you get it right! Fight! Remember bottom line you must do the work and feel worth fighting for (which you are).
Good luck my friend
You are not alone with your problem. First off you need to stop feeling the shame. You are and eloquent and obviously a smart human being. The trouble is that being smart has nothing to do with falling prey to an addiction as a coping skill. many smart people have struggled with addiction ( people like George W. Not trying to get political here just saying successful and knowledgeable people have fallen prey to booze). There are even passages in the Bible that lend to the fact that even Noah one of god's chosen men struggled with the bottle. So don't beat yourself up. AA is a wonderful organization and has worked for millions of people that being said it still has a fairly low success rate if you look at the stats. If you are one of the people it works for wonderful but there are many options out there if you make it your job to find out.
One thing that I have read about is that it is a matter of retraining your unconscious mind. Addictions are held in this part of the brain just like other animal like behaviors (meaning survival) your mind thinks without the alcohol you will die, so that primal brain or "Booze Brain" keeps feeding you lies all based around it's own survival.
Check out the principles of Core
1. Commit
2. Objectify
3.Respond
4.Enjoy
It's about retraining your Booze Brain and allowing your conscious mind make the right decisions and disarming the lies the Booze Brain tells you. This is your life and you are worth it! I would do anything possible to save your own life, even hypnosis. That worked for a friend of mine that drank and smoked, he quit and is happier today!
I know it is especially hard when you have other physical ailments I understand because I struggle with Fibromyalgia and Lupis. Woerk closely with a medical DR even if you feel like you are being a pain in the ass. We have to police our own health care in life today. Get honest with them, if they are not understanding and helpful fire them and get a new Doctor. Look up some of Dr Drews advice he has worked as an addiction specialist for years if the 12 step path is not right for you try something else until you get it right! Fight! Remember bottom line you must do the work and feel worth fighting for (which you are).
Good luck my friend
What program has a higher success rate ? Proof & Stats please.....
Last edited by Pawporri; 01-03-2013 at 08:00 PM..
Reason: Bolding
You have drawn a lot of love and concern from your post. I wish you the best. I won't repeat the advice I usually give because I'm getting tired of repeating it and I think people end up doing what they want to do anyway. Good luck.
Try Moderation Management. They can be found at Moderation Management we have refered a number of people to them that would like to try it on thier own. Its worked for a number of our folks.
I didn't have time to read all the other responses but I saw an article in the paper last night where someone was saying that the Salvation Army offers a free 6 month minimum inpatient adult rehabilitation program but they say it is tough, spiritually based 12-step program. You might check that out. I am guessing someone has already pointed out that you don't have to be getting drunk to be an alcoholic. By your post, I don't think you see your situation as change worthy since you seem to be setting conditions as to what you are willing to do but maybe you'll get there. Overcoming addiction is not easy and obviously, just stopping drinking alcohol will not solve your problems so you'll have to fix your other issues in conjunction with giving up alcohol. I am not sure what it will take for you to dig your heels in but I hope it comes soon.
I hate to read things like this. Todays popular culture has so vilified alcohol as being "bad and evil" that people feel so guilty for drinking that it puts them into a depression.
The truth of the matter is that in decades and centuries past, people drank a HECK of a lot more alcohol than they do now. In fact, during the late 1880s and early 1900s people were drinking an incredible amount of alcohol. People had shots of liquor for breakfast and *nobody* thought a thing about it.
Normally, I would say... 'As long as it is not affecting your personal life", but you say that it is. I wonder if the depression you are feeling is a result of all the negative pressure about drinking or if maybe you might have a B Vitamin deficiency. Typically alcohol DOES deplete your B vitamins badly. Also, I am sure that you are Vitamin D deficient as well.
Rather than cutting back on your alcohol, why not just spend more time outside getting some exercise, and supplement your diet with some good quality vitamins. You will see a lot of improvement in your outlook on life and maybe, if you are using alcohol to self-medicate, you might be inclined to not drink quite as much. You can also purchase Kudzu supplements which get rid of your desire to drink. (They are used all the time in rehab programs).
Overall though, I'd stop beating myself up over doing something that you enjoy doing. Do you really want to stop drinking or do you feel that drinking that much is "wrong" based upon other people's values? You have to be careful not to let other people run your life.
I'm never legally drunk. But I drink too much. I keep a very low, controlled buzz going most of the day and stop drinking around dinner time because of the way it interferes with sleep. I have serious physical issues (chronic pain and disability) and emotional issues (self-hate, anxiety, depression) so I'm obviously self-medicating with alcohol at the level of about 5 drinks a day, equivalent of a bottle of wine per day.
That might not sound like too much, but it's a very major issue for me. I take other medications that interact with the alcohol so it's as if I were drinking more. And I DEPEND on it. And it makes me feel like nothing matters so I'll just lie around watching TV or chatting on a web forum.... yeah, how many of you will cop to THAT being part of why you're here so much?
My question is this: Do I have to hit the wall? If I'm not willing to simply STOP on my own, don't want to go to AA meetings, and don't have the money for a high quality treatment program, what's going to happen? Will it simply be a matter of being smacked in the face with a crisis that forces me to deal with it? Or can someone provide me with inspiration that will make me WANT to stop drinking?
Thanks to anyone who responds sincerely to my very sincere questions. I'm being quite vulnerable and putting myself on the line here in a public forum, but I feel like it's worth it to expose myself because I know I'm not alone and perhaps others will be helped by this thread. Bless you all.
The amount of alcohol that you drink, in my opinion, is not excessive. Up until liquor was demonized by the media, adults regularly consumed as much, or more without a second thought. That having been said, the fact that YOU are unhappy with it is the problem which must be addressed.
No one can change or fix this except you. You are infinitely in control of your life. I don't know what is causing your chronic pain and disability, but I would certainly address this with a good natropathic or holistic practitioner who will find out WHY you are having these issues and fix it, rather than a doctor who will simply prescribe medication that masks the symptoms while the damage continues.
I would check on the internet to try to find an anti-inflammation alkaline diet that will help reduce your pain, which is usually caused by inflammation.
Quite often the need/desire for alcohol is based upon a B vitamin deficiency. You might consider taking a high quality B vitamin supplement to help you.
You might also consider taking Kudzu supplements which has been used in for many years in Asia to fight alcoholism, apparently it completely eliminates the desire to drink.
To say that five drinks a day is not excessive because people drank a lot in the past is not congruent with current acceptable standards. People (drunks) in the past beat their wives and kids and did all kinds of unmentionable things (probably under the influence of excessive alcohol use) and died horrible deaths of cirrhosis and cancers . . . to have the perspective that the media has denigrated alcohol is insane - all I see are ads for this and that flavored vodka, the beer ads with sports, etc. I am guessing you are a heavy drinker yourself, perhaps and in denial, for sure.
To say that five drinks a day is not excessive because people drank a lot in the past is not congruent with current acceptable standards. People (drunks) in the past beat their wives and kids and did all kinds of unmentionable things (probably under the influence of excessive alcohol use) and died horrible deaths of cirrhosis and cancers . . . to have the perspective that the media has denigrated alcohol is insane - all I see are ads for this and that flavored vodka, the beer ads with sports, etc. I am guessing you are a heavy drinker yourself, perhaps and in denial, for sure.
Yes ditto on that.
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I understand and feel your pain
