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Look she came up pregnant in senior year. I did not have time or money for a baby. I had a scholarship to College and that’s what my Mom wanted me to do. I did not want to give that up and I am sure none you would either, she had lots of scholarships but no she decided to have a baby.
I was trying to better myself so I could help support my child. I just got caught up in the party of college and lost my scholarship and then I had to take out a lot of student loans.
Now my mom and I are over 28,000 in debt on student loans all in a two period. The military would not pay them off for me since they were private loans. Now my mom and I have to pay those off.
It was really hard on me not to get caught up in the partying so finally they kicked me out for poor grades and that’s when I showed up in Florida and talked her into marrying me. I only have permanent citizenship so I thought if she married me I could get my US Citizenship and take care of my child when I got to E5 and again her family has more money than mine.
So you guys need to let up I am doing the best I can. Does only one know if I do get shared parenting would I get BAH or do I have to have lots of visitation to get it. If I don’t get the BAH I am not going to be able to pay my Mom back, pay my car note and my other student loans.
The fact that her family has money does not excuse you from your duty as a PARENT.
You are doing all of this for your OWN benefit.
Last edited by KickAssArmyChick; 02-06-2011 at 05:06 PM..
So, you feel that your CHILD and the AF OWES you for YOUR debt? If her parents have money that is terriffic...for her PARENTS! Her parents are not obligated to pay for your child - you have to pay for your fair share of the costs of raising her.
You were so concerned with "bettering" yourself that you partied your way out of scholarship and into student loans? Tough. Your debts are your debts. You do NOT get to use any monies that the AF graciously paid for your dependents to pay for prior debts or your new car!
You think that you are entitled to a free ride, or that the money allocated to your child was yours to support yourself with; I think that you will find little support or sympathy amongst adults that struggle to pay for their children and their own lifestyles.
Student loans? Pay them yourself! You think that your age excuses your childish behavior? It certainly does NOT!
Try to find some honor deep within yourself. Your child needs a FATHER, not a selfish sperm donor. You do not like the Barracks or the nutritious food that is provided for you by the AF? Get a second job and pay your own way! No one is sitting here crying for you because you have a safe place to sleep and plentiful food to eat. There are starving Americans and most of them are children, grow up and become a man worthy of being in the AF.
You are NOT a child but you do have a child to care for; stop thinking of yourself, your debts, your parties and your own comforts. Try to be a grown man.
Your questions can be answered by your attorney and the AF. I hope that you are forced to pay back every single cent that you so knowingly and selfishly spent on yourself. I love the way you call your ex names while absolving yourself of any responsibility. She divorced you without your knowledge? Obviously she did so because you disappeared (by your own admission), it is apparent that she takes her role of parent seriously (she even generously allows for visitations that you have no interest in other than as a "free" vacation.
You obviously have no respect for others, not even for yourself. Grow up, you are a Father and your free ride has come to a stop!
You do realize that you can get in a lot of trouble for that right? When you signed your BAH form, you are OBLIGATED to provide your dependents with adequate support. It reads: " I am aware that failure to support the above named dependents may result in stopping BAQ and recouping BAQ for any prior periods/non support."
You sound so much like my douchebag ex husband...who thought that BAH was party money. Thankfully I am prior service and I know how the system works so... I called his chain of command and he was obligated to give me the money, or pay them back.
I hope someone tells your ex-wife about the BAH and she goes after your chain of command and leaves you with nothing because that is exactly what you deserve.
And why the hell do you even want BAH? You have no interest in being a parent. You are just using this child for money.
Grow up.
I believe I covered my a** on this one. I had my sister send her an email she never responsed. So she is the one that was unreachable and thats all I had to tell them. I was to busy with Boot camp and Tech school over in Sheppard and then I had Tech Training right in her back yard for six weeks. I drove by where they lived everyone look to me like they were doing just fine without my money. I was concerned they would cause me trouble so I did not stop by. I just did not know I was divorced until I read in on her facebook account and then emailed her mom. She really enjoyed telling me I was already divorced.
I guess will see soon how things turn out, but I don't believe I will be giving her any back support, or returning any BAH, I am sure my story is good with the AF and I don't believe I will be paying any daycare expenses either her Mom can continue to watch her. I don't really think I have to pay much in child support either. Maybe a couple hundred bucks.
I was hoping someone on her might know something about BAH and travel expenses. My mistake............
You really think that the AF will be okay with you collecting BAH and keeping it all for yourself???? Ummm, sorry, but that is NOT the way things work in the adult world. If you ' couldn't ' reach her then you were bound to inform the AF so that you would not collect the BAH and spend it upon yourself.
You see, the BAH w/Dep is NOT for the benefit of a young, healthy Airman without any intelligence or morals. If you believe that your cover story will hold water then you will be very surprised when you suddenly have "no pay due" for quite a while, and perhaps even charges under the UCMJ, because you knowingly took and kept money that was intended fro your family.
Infantile behavior from a person who thinks that he is actually intelligent. I do hope that you get 'everything' that you have coming to you. You are quite low and the saddest thing is that you think that you deserve the money and benefits meant for your child.
Oh, and by the way- my Husband used to be MPI & and guard at Ft. Leavenworth and there were more than a couple inmates in for Fraud because they intentionally kept monies intended for their families.
If you think that the barracks and food are bad now just wait until you are curled in a ball hoping that the line of inmates waiting outside your cell are really just a nightmare.
First off MAN UP and GROW UP! You are a father and a husband and by UCMJ you are OBLIGATED to support your family! You HAVE to put food on the table and roof over their heads. Its your responsibility.
Second, if you draw BAH with Dependant that is to help support your family. NOT for you to party and do as you will on. If you are drawing BAH and are pocketing the money you can lose that money and as Melanie said...get charged with fraud. Not only that but if the US Gov't finds out, they can take it out of your pay. Trust me they take pay back faster than they give it. I truely hope you have your child on DEERS so she/he is getting Tricare.
Third, a court CAN be ordered to give back support and to continue support.
Honestly, boys like you need a reality check. You asked if you could get BAH, your getting the reality of it more than once in this thread.
No one but the AF/Govt can determine if your eligible for BAH. To be honest, with what you have put on here, I hope you dont get it....its not extra money for you, its for your FAMILY. Oh and when it comes to child support, BAH, your pay and any extra pay is all added in. Last but not least....these are al facts. I've been with my husband since the day he joined and was an E3 nearly 7 years ago. I know how hard it is to make it on a E3 pay and how hard it is still to be on the pay he is getting. Its about budgeting your money and not counting your chickens before they hatch. You chose this lifestyle, so deal with the pay.
First of all, you give all men a bad name. Second, you committed fraud and you might be subject to UCMJ action if you get caught. You signed an AF3010 when you enlisted (it is probably in your ARMS or you can get a copy on e-pubs). It is a statement of dependent care. If you receive extra money for dependents it has to be used in part to support your dependents.
You can't get allowances if you have no legal claim to the child, no custody, and don't pay support. You didn't say if you legally ended up with custody. If so, you should be entitled to full BAH and to move off base as your child, during visitation, can not stay in the dorms with you.
If you have to pay child support, you'll still live in the dorms and get something called BAH with Diff. It is a smaller amount of BAH to equal the amount of child support you have to pay.
If you get visitation, you may get full BAH and be able to move out of the dorms.
And you were married just for the extra money and you call her a ******? Again, this is Fraud.
Sounds like you started off being "married" and stayed married only for the BAH... a super big no no.
Here are some articles about the fraud you committed, and are seeking advice to commit again.
I believe I covered my a** on this one. I had my sister send her an email she never responsed. So she is the one that was unreachable and thats all I had to tell them. I was to busy with Boot camp and Tech school over in Sheppard and then I had Tech Training right in her back yard for six weeks. I drove by where they lived everyone look to me like they were doing just fine without my money. I was concerned they would cause me trouble so I did not stop by. I just did not know I was divorced until I read in on her facebook account and then emailed her mom. She really enjoyed telling me I was already divorced.
I guess will see soon how things turn out, but I don't believe I will be giving her any back support, or returning any BAH, I am sure my story is good with the AF and I don't believe I will be paying any daycare expenses either her Mom can continue to watch her. I don't really think I have to pay much in child support either. Maybe a couple hundred bucks.
I was hoping someone on her might know something about BAH and travel expenses. My mistake............
It doesn't matter if she is a billionaire... child support is based on YOUR obligations, not on her family's money. You committed fraud- and you can be held criminally liable and be forced to repay that money even if you sent her an email, and even if she doesn't need the money.
Thank God she divorced you because otherwise you'd still be committing fraud (the time in which you only stayed married for the BAH.)
We are telling you the answer to your question about BAH, what you did and are trying to do is illegal, unethical, against the AF Core values, and against the better senses of most people in America. The answer you want to hear doesn't exist.
If you legally get a custody agreement and/or court order child support, you can collect BAH again, but otherwise- no.
Otherwise, get promoted to SrA and you'll be moving out of the dorms soon enough anyway.
Additionally, if you have legal custody agreement, please get your child on your tricare benefits.
Last edited by dmarie123; 02-07-2011 at 07:52 AM..
First off MAN UP and GROW UP! You are a father and a husband and by UCMJ you are OBLIGATED to support your family! You HAVE to put food on the table and roof over their heads. Its your responsibility.
Second, if you draw BAH with Dependant that is to help support your family. NOT for you to party and do as you will on. If you are drawing BAH and are pocketing the money you can lose that money and as Melanie said...get charged with fraud. Not only that but if the US Gov't finds out, they can take it out of your pay. Trust me they take pay back faster than they give it. I truely hope you have your child on DEERS so she/he is getting Tricare.
Third, a court CAN be ordered to give back support and to continue support.
Honestly, boys like you need a reality check. You asked if you could get BAH, your getting the reality of it more than once in this thread.
No one but the AF/Govt can determine if your eligible for BAH. To be honest, with what you have put on here, I hope you dont get it....its not extra money for you, its for your FAMILY. Oh and when it comes to child support, BAH, your pay and any extra pay is all added in. Last but not least....these are al facts. I've been with my husband since the day he joined and was an E3 nearly 7 years ago. I know how hard it is to make it on a E3 pay and how hard it is still to be on the pay he is getting. Its about budgeting your money and not counting your chickens before they hatch. You chose this lifestyle, so deal with the pay.
Like I said she already divorced me without me knowing it. I had my child on Deers but she didn't know it, so they went out and got her own insurance. Now she doesn't want to give that insurance up and wants me to pay for it.............
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