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Old 08-25-2006, 08:41 PM
 
1 posts, read 4,055 times
Reputation: 11

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What have you done to meet people?

Find a volleyball team, softball, card club, etc. There are a million clubs and publicly organized events.
What do you bring to the table? Frienships start with shared interests. Get going.

 
Old 08-26-2006, 04:29 PM
 
Location: Twin Cities
302 posts, read 727,861 times
Reputation: 330
Red face Hmmmm...

ModUptwnGrl summarized all my thoughts well!! People here are very nice but I've never felt like such a social misfit in my life! I've always had lots of friends and am very considerate (I too HATE to think I might be imposing on anyone). But here's an example. Until moving here, I lived in L.A. most of my life. Whenever I met someone new, from out of town (that seemed nice/normal) I usually tried to include them in my social circle. I would invite them to dinner or the movies with my friends...just to help them establish some aquaintances/friendships....and not have to sit home alone/lonely. Most of my friends did the same...always trying to include newcomers.

Here in Minneapolis everyone has been very nice...and they seem interested in me...more curious as to WHY someone from California would move to Minnesota. They always have things going on (going to the cabin, going to a BBQ, going to Lake Calhoun)...and they know I have little if anything going on, but they never invite me along. They always just say stuff like, "oh you should go to Brit's Pub...it's a great place to meet people"...or "go rollerblading around Lake Harriet...lots of singles there". But I don't want to go alone. I don't get why no one invites me to join them in any of their activities? My coworker who also relocated here is going through the same thing...a year has passed and she has a LOT of aquaintances, but no real friends. SHe's a normal, nice girl too.

Again...I LOVE my new life in Minnesota...and think Minnesotans are for the most part genuinely good people...if I were stuck on the side of the road in a snow storm I have no doubt someone would pull over and help me. I just wish they were more open minded to meeting and befriending new people ("outsiders").

Forget dating...even guys here are super reserved! How do people here date and get married? Everyone is so reserved. And in L.A. I'm considered reserved!...here I'm super outgoing in comparison! Yikes!

Oh...and I'm a 30-something (Gen Xer)...not a 20-something. And I think the most OUTGOING people I've encountered are from the Uptown area for some reason (to comment on someone else's comment that Uptown people tend to be "snooty").

I have joined a gym and a running club so I'm coming in a lot more contact with people...and trying to connect with someone...anyone! It would just be nice to have people to go to dinner and movies with!
 
Old 09-23-2006, 11:07 PM
 
131 posts, read 616,585 times
Reputation: 37
I've lived here all my life and MidniteBreeze has pretty much said it all. I hate imposing on other people. I have a small group of friends that I'm comfortable with. With the hours I work it's hard to keep friendships going.

One thing if you haven't noticed is that you may have to ask someone several times before they accept. It's not that they don't want to, but most Minnesotans are rather reserved.
 
Old 09-25-2006, 05:53 PM
 
1,126 posts, read 3,857,247 times
Reputation: 426
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSMCGirl View Post
ModUptwnGrl summarized all my thoughts well!! People here are very nice but I've never felt like such a social misfit in my life! I've always had lots of friends and am very considerate (I too HATE to think I might be imposing on anyone). But here's an example. Until moving here, I lived in L.A. most of my life. Whenever I met someone new, from out of town (that seemed nice/normal) I usually tried to include them in my social circle. I would invite them to dinner or the movies with my friends...just to help them establish some aquaintances/friendships....and not have to sit home alone/lonely. Most of my friends did the same...always trying to include newcomers.

Here in Minneapolis everyone has been very nice...and they seem interested in me...more curious as to WHY someone from California would move to Minnesota. They always have things going on (going to the cabin, going to a BBQ, going to Lake Calhoun)...and they know I have little if anything going on, but they never invite me along. They always just say stuff like, "oh you should go to Brit's Pub...it's a great place to meet people"...or "go rollerblading around Lake Harriet...lots of singles there". But I don't want to go alone. I don't get why no one invites me to join them in any of their activities? My coworker who also relocated here is going through the same thing...a year has passed and she has a LOT of aquaintances, but no real friends. SHe's a normal, nice girl too.

Again...I LOVE my new life in Minnesota...and think Minnesotans are for the most part genuinely good people...if I were stuck on the side of the road in a snow storm I have no doubt someone would pull over and help me. I just wish they were more open minded to meeting and befriending new people ("outsiders").

Forget dating...even guys here are super reserved! How do people here date and get married? Everyone is so reserved. And in L.A. I'm considered reserved!...here I'm super outgoing in comparison! Yikes!

Oh...and I'm a 30-something (Gen Xer)...not a 20-something. And I think the most OUTGOING people I've encountered are from the Uptown area for some reason (to comment on someone else's comment that Uptown people tend to be "snooty").

I have joined a gym and a running club so I'm coming in a lot more contact with people...and trying to connect with someone...anyone! It would just be nice to have people to go to dinner and movies with!
That "gen-x" made me laugh! I think I am by one year or something. So, people don't do that there? I am always out BS'ing with the neighbors or going ou twith them to dinner or what not. Is this just for the single life or in general?
 
Old 10-26-2006, 05:48 PM
 
Location: Bloomington, MN
1 posts, read 4,045 times
Reputation: 10
Default Making friends

I just moved in June from Louisiana. I am having the same issue of trying to meet and make friends. I would welcome any and all suggestions!
Let me know what you have found to be successful!
 
Old 11-19-2006, 10:21 AM
 
1 posts, read 4,043 times
Reputation: 10
Default hopeful

I just moved to St. Paul in September and haven't had much luck meeting people. Today I found this site online ... imnotfromhere.com, where you can join a group called twin cities transplants. Seems like a good idea ...
 
Old 11-19-2006, 04:38 PM
 
Location: MN/WI/MI
153 posts, read 711,804 times
Reputation: 95
Well, I'm a transplant, but only from Wisconsin. Thus, a ton of my friends are transplanted to MN as well, so my circle of friends really hasn't changed since I moved here.

I will echo what others have said - in that many Minnesotans make friends for "life" when they are young and after that don't really intend to meet new people. As for myself, I've had my circle of friends since elementary school, and a few additions from college.

I will say I am one of those reserved Minnesotans that everyone on here talks about. I think it's just something in the culture of the North Central area of the country. Everyone keeps to themselves.

I will say that I believe you when you guys say it's tough to make friends out here. I've known a few who have tried to inflitrate our circles of friends and have had a very tough time doing so. It's not like it's purposeful, but the bond just isn't there.

All I can say is keep trying, and know that it will take time to make friends around here, but once you do, they're the type of friends who won't leave you, ever.

The only other thing I can say, is once you hit 30 out here, if you are still single it's going to be tough to make friends. Many couples in the late 20s early 30s are starting out with kids, and look for couples similar to themselves, for new friends and exclude the singles. Thus I think it's even harder to make friends if you are single and over 30. Many couples just don't view themselves as able to do "single" activities, so they shoot for the couples with kids their age, or in the same "stage" of life. So get married, and start popping babies out!
 
Old 11-20-2006, 04:38 PM
 
1 posts, read 4,039 times
Reputation: 10
I moved here from IA in February and I tend to agree with you. Not that IA is much better, but since I grew up there it was easy to meet people. I think MN is all about networking- who you know, meet a few people, then meet their friends and so on. I would suggest getting involved in some sort of group- there is an action/adventure group out there that does singles type things but fun stuff- not like creepy speed dating or anything. I've often thought about starting my own "New to MN" group to get together at different businesses...any takers??
Good luck, it will get easier...I hope!
 
Old 12-01-2006, 10:52 PM
 
180 posts, read 635,353 times
Reputation: 278
Hey, I don't have too much time to type but I lived in Minneapolis for two years and got kind of the same impression (though when not in Minnesota, I tend to get along with Minnesotans & Wisconsonites alot better than most anyone else (though I grew up in North Dakota, same region so maybe that's why)). On the plus side for Minneapolis, I'm of the firm opinion that it is the greatest city in the world and I miss it quite often.

I'd suggest meetup.com - I met some friends there when I moved to Charlotte. Also check out if Minneapolis - St. Paul has a young proffesionals club thing. I'm meeting alot of people in the New Jersey Young Proffesionals group njyp.org(usually 20 & 30 somethings)- and, of all places, I know Bismarck ND (same region as Minneapolis) has a rediculusly active young proffesionals group - www.ypnetwork.org. Meetup & young proffessional groups tend to be great to meet people because people there are more than often not from the area and even if they are from the area, they WANT to meet new people.
 
Old 12-04-2006, 02:50 PM
 
3 posts, read 7,239 times
Reputation: 10
Default meeting people

I agree. I have lived in a lot of states and it seems like people here are fairly reserved. I have to admit, some of my friends here have been the best friends I have ever met. One is from here and the other is not.
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