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From my count, OP, that's at least 5 people who agree with what you said. When the minority starts to equal the majority, its hard to say that someone is crazy or completely wrong, isn't it?
Exactly. Strength in numbers. So its either Jersey isnt as good as these people pretend it is, and that there is alot more bad then good, or all 6 of us are all crazy losers with no life.
No need to have a breakdown. If you need a city you have to live in one. Don't repeat your mistakes. If you are really as young as you claim, you have plenty of time to make things better. If someone is content in their life it doesn't mean they think their life or community is perfect. No need to assume they didn't work for what they have either.
Having spent most of my life in NJ, I would say it was living in Bergen County. I loved in Somerset for 20 years, people are little nicer - farther from city.
Yea I think Bergen county is the real problem in the OP. I was born and raised in Somerset County (Hillsborough) and even though its not all puppies and rainbows it is a good area. That far north has really just become a suburb of NYC. With that comes the NYC attitude. I think if the OPer had lived in NW, Central or even South Jersey he would have had a different experience.
Not really.
If this was really an actual early 20's person, they would want to go more urban next time for sure. Unless they hate city living for some reason.
Not really.
If this was really an actual early 20's person, they would want to go more urban next time for sure. Unless they hate city living for some reason.
I know I said I wouldnt respond to any more crazy posts but no reason to be dishonest about my age on a forum. But ill actually be 23 in a couple of weeks. So really im 23 not 22. So please, keep thinking im some 40 year old man, it makes no difference. And yes I understand what you mean, im not saying none of them worked hard. But I know alot of them and they got inheritance. And the kids my age mostly only go to school, if that, not work fulltime jobs to pay rent and bills. Thats not an assumption, I was friends with these kids for awhile. But you are wrong about one thing, that none of them think there life is perfect. Yea thats not true, alot of them walk around with there nose in the air, speaking down on people. You dont have to tell me anything, I have worked at Pottery Barn at Riverside Square Mall and West Elm stores. So I have been around those kinds of people. But as I said in the beginning I have also met some nice people while living here as well, but more bad then good.
For the 9th time, he never said "ALL" people in NJ, nor did he say the "WHOLE" state is this or that. And also, he's a 22 year old kid from Cali that moved here (according to him) due to an abusive household. He made a mistake when he realized that NJ, and Bergen County in particular, is not at all what he expected. Then he explained why he doesn't like it (which I agree with his sentiment because I find these same things to be true).
We all make mistakes and certainly made them when we were 22, that's how you learn about the world. So back off and give it a rest.
Wow. Really? He never said "ALL" people in NJ or the "WHOLE" state? Did you read the OP?
Let us review:
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestCoast8
Alright, sorry for the long book that I am getting ready to write about why I cannot stand this state and will be heading back to California. This is definately the worst place I could have ever decided to move to. I moved here in 2007, for a fresh start and to get away from alot of things back home. At first, I thought it was an ok place, but once I started to actually get around and work and what not, I realize how ****ty this place really is especially to outsiders like myself.
Now before you guys go on bashing me, I am a nice guy, easy to get along with and have never had a problem making friends and keeping them or dating women, until I moved here. I must have made about 80 friends since I have been here, but almost all of them have come and gone. I get the "im busy" and "my girlfriend this or that", or just act plain weird towards me. Like one day we are friends and the next day they dont know me or just plain act shady. I have never been in such a state where everybody is about themselves.Almost everyone brags about themselves as if they were the ****. I just want to say, "get your nose out the air your not any better then anyone else." Why are people here like this? So unfriendly and shady?
And please dont get me started on the dating here. Im a good looking guy, and it is still tough for me. The women around here all think they are queens and are superior, even the fat ones. Trust me, I didnt meet 1 or 2 women, I met alot and 95% of the have that sense of entitlement. You cant even walk up and talk to one without getting some kind of attitude. And the games the jersey women play out here are also a new all time low. One minute she tells me she likes me and wants to get to know me, the next she doesnt know what she wants and when I back off, she likes me and wants to get to know me again. Everywhere you see a couple the guy is following the girl like a puppy dog, because he is afraid of losing her. The girls here know they have the advantage, seeing that there is like 10 guys to 1 girl. So they take advantage, because if she dumps him she can go out and find a rebound guy the same day. The guy doesnt have that luxury, and it will probably be awhile before he finds anything.Most of them cheat, lie, and play games anyway. You walk into a bar, there are 30 guys and like 10 girls, and 5 of them are there with bf and the others arent looking for anything lol. And they will be expecting alot of attention when so they arent exactly approachable.
And online dating doesnt work ( I have never been subjected to having to do that anywhere else). I was talking to a woman I met on a site we exchanged numbers and talked about meeting up after like 3 weeks of phone convo. She was a couple hours away. I told her I would drive to meet her, I got there and she didnt answer her phone. It was about 11pm, I didnt feel like driving so I slept in my car. Woke up drove back home the next morning and she calls me. And makes up a story about how she couldnt make it. Being the nice guy that I was, I drove out there again. And again, no answer. So I just drove back home and ignored her calls and messages. And decide that online dating wasnt for me either. So I was just alone for awhile. Having friends and there girlfriends rub it in my face constantly. Which was fine I dont mind being by myself. I havent meet any geniune people here anyway.
Its a hard life here, and I have talked to a few others that live here that moved from other places and they agree. You come here, everyone is in there own little worlds, there own little groups, and usually dont want an outsider to be apart of it. And thats fine with me I dont need to be around people alot anyway. And like I said the women are worst, they are as selfish as they come, constantly talking about themselves. You try to have a convo with one, all she will do is go on and on about herself. And no, women everywhere arent like this. Of course you have your bad apples everywhere, but when the bad outweighs the good, then you know you have a problem.
But thats enough about the friends and dating, the jobs here and the job security are the worst. I have had a total of 6 jobs for the 3 years I have been here. One job I was able to keep for a year, but he ended up letting me go because they couldnt afford me anymore. Another job I had for a month, let me go because the company was going out of business. My 3rd job, the guy let me go after 3 months because he was having a bad week and decided he couldnt afford me anymore. So I was fired/laid off. And so on. You mean to tell me for a place so expensive to simply even rent a room ( I pay 620 to rent a room),that I cant keep a job to stay alive? If the cost of living in this state wasnt so expensive, then it wouldnt be a big deal. But it is.
So there you have it, the people suck ( some are bipolar ), jobs suck, COL is terrible, dating scene sucks, and unless you like going to bars and clubs all the time, there isnt much to do here. Ill admit I have meet some nice people her, only a few though. Place is just full of rude, selfish attention whores. Not exactly worth my time anymore I gave this state all I had, I really tried, as I came here to start a new life. But this lifestyle here, chewed me up and spat me out. Not sure if its because im a minority in a jewish area. Ill be the first to admit it I cant handle this place. Isnt for everyone. So back to Cali I go. I will not miss this place one bit ( except for the food Itailan is the best ) Im still in my early 20s.I know ill have a bunch of negative comments, but I honestly dont care, as none of you know me personally nor have you gone through the experiences I have especially living here.
First of all, the name of this thread is "For those who want to move to new jersey (especially bergen county) from other states, don't bother". That's pretty grandiose.
'Dear Everybody:
Don't move to NJ (especially Bergen County) because my 22 year old self had a bad time there. Trust me. I have first hand knowledge not only about Paramus, but the 89 other municipalities in Bergen County. I have met all 27,000 people in Paramus, as well as all 900,000 people in Bergen County. I don't really know anything about the 20 other counties in NJ, but you can trust my opinion about the whole state and when I say things like "jersey women".
Sincerely, WestCoast8'
That's basically what this thread boils down to.
City Data is supposed to be a forum for sharing facts, information and yes, opinions, about different locations. There have been plenty of people to voice legitimate, intelligent negative opinions about NJ. That's fine.
There's nothing intelligent about this thread. It's a life complaint thread. It's the kind of emo post you see college kids making on LiveJournal. Blah blah blah, FML. It's unproductive, unhelpful and not useful. Are you kidding? People are supposed to take this thread into serious consideration when deciding to move to NJ or Bergen County?
It's not whether or not you are pressured into getting a $300 haircut. I realize that no one is going to force you at gunpoint. Its about being surrounded by, day in and day out, people who only care about money, status, and material items.
You're SURROUNDED by, day in and day out, people who only care about money, status, and material items? Really? SURROUNDED?
Who can take statements like this seriously? It's just as ludicrous as the people who got robbed once and now post that NJ is 'FILLED' with crime and 'lowlifes'.
So which is it, people? Is NJ a snobby, rich rat-race, or is it a gang banger ghetto?
Yea thats not true, alot of them walk around with there nose in the air, speaking down on people. You dont have to tell me anything, I have worked at Pottery Barn at Riverside Square Mall and West Elm stores. So I have been around those kinds of people.
OH! You don't say! There are rich snobby people shopping at Pottery Barn? Get out!
This is just as stupid as saying, "Hey man, trust me. I worked at McDonald's. There are a lot of fat people in NJ."
Exactly. Strength in numbers. So its either Jersey isnt as good as these people pretend it is, and that there is alot more bad then good, or all 6 of us are all crazy losers with no life.
well go back to the land of fruits and then and leave us alone already.. good lord
Don't let the door hit ya in the a$$
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