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Yeah its not for everybody. People move here thinking its going to be a dream or "Just like the movies" but the truth is people often would rather visit than to live here. However as others have said I strongly suggest you try out an outer bourough..specifically queens.
I don't like the city, but am trying to. I was curious to hear from the minority of others who have a similar point of view, or who can offer a more measured perspective. I have digested all the "Greatest place on earth! Nothing like it! Wow! Fantastic!" commentaries from the boosters, pundits and arm chair analysts (some posting bitchy and defensive critiques here.) I got your opinions, have heard them, acknowledge them. What I wanted to know if there was anyone out there who feels let down by the city. Yes, Midtown is kind of a tourist trap. Yes, I have friends with more disposable income than sense. But that's kind of the point-- given the city as it is, with all of its hype and flaws, there is a huge population who chooses to stay, many of whom will plunk down a small fortune every month to live in a building with mice.
As defensive and nutty as some of these comments are, it gives me perspective. Maybe part of the reason I can't "get it" is because of the "love it or leave it" attitude of many New Yorkers. Its less than welcoming.
The answer is, travel outside of Midtown. Get away from the 9k luxury apartments. Go towards the neighborhoods that contain people that don't spend a majority of their cash just to say they live in Manhattan.
Astoria, Jackson Heights, Kew Gardens, or Forest Hills. Just nice neighborhoods filled with people that work to make their areas better. Mixes of trendy spots and dives.
I think New Yorkers are proud to be New Yorkers. The love it or leave it attitude is kind of important in this city. There are many complainers that it's hard to constantly explain. So it's one of those take or leave it type places. I still love the city but I don't venture into Manhattan much anymore, unless its to work.
After reading this thread and re-reading the original posters' different posts, It seems to me this is an original poster problem with self. I will expect a negative defensive response from the original poster. as she did with others, and that's fine.
She's venting, and that's fine, it's common on internet measage boards. And some may relate, some will get defensive, and some neither.
As some have suggested, there are many places, areas, things to do in NYC that might not be what you have previously done or considered. No one is forcing you to do those previous things or go to those previous places. The original poster does seem preoccupied with image and status. Again, I'm prepared for the negative response. It's not the place, it's the person. You have to be happy with yourself first. If NYC is not working out for you, see if you can eliminate going there for your job, or seek a new one.
There is no perfect place. Doesn't exist. It does seem that what others do, say, have is too important to the original poster, based on the her comments in this thread. That's the place I'd start. If you do the things you like to do, in the places you like to do them, you will do just fine. ...assuming you know what those things are, and/or you take the time to figure that out.
After reading this thread and re-reading the original posters' different posts, It seems to me this is an original poster problem with self. I will expect a negative defensive response from the original poster. as she did with others, and that's fine.
She's venting, and that's fine, it's common on internet measage boards. And some may relate, some will get defensive, and some neither.
As some have suggested, there are many places, areas, things to do in NYC that might not be what you have previously done or considered. No one is forcing you to do those previous things or go to those previous places. The original poster does seem preoccupied with image and status. Again, I'm prepared for the negative response. It's not the place, it's the person. You have to be happy with yourself first. If NYC is not working out for you, see if you can eliminate going there for your job, or seek a new one.
There is no perfect place. Doesn't exist. It does seem that what others do, say, have is too important to the original poster, based on the her comments in this thread. That's the place I'd start. If you do the things you like to do, in the places you like to do them, you will do just fine. ...assuming you know what those things are, and/or you take the time to figure that out.
Sigh-- okay, this is my last response.
I am not concerned with image or status. I appreciate that you re-read the responses and my posts, but some how I am failing to convey that the constant running around, hours to travel a few blocks, massive expense and crazy rat-race that is my experience with NYC leaves me very unimpressed. I DON'T like that stuff. I have relocated recently to get AWAY from that sort of vibe/lifestyle.
I can't refuse to go to NYC for work, nor can I choose to stay somewhere more authentic than Midtown. And yes, I have pals with money. Certainly not all my pals do. My amazement was that anyone would spend so much to live with mice. Just sayin, this place has got to have *something* going for it. What it is, I don't get.
Its easy to make a judgment about some anonymous poster. And NYC is FULL of people who love it and let me know how much they love it. When I am in NYC, even the things I enjoy have the fun sucked out of them by inconvenience, cost, crowded conditions. Take sitting under a tree. Last time I did that in Central Park, dozens of tourists with loud kids parked themselves close by and started yelling at one another. I moved. Three more times. I could never be alone to read a book. I love the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens, but find that after a long day of dealing with egos from the folks I have to work with, I don't have the energy to visit. It wears me out.
Thanks to all of you who have let me know I am not alone.
I got the message-- if you don't like NYC, there is something wrong with *you*, not the city.
Last edited by confusedasusual; 05-09-2012 at 01:47 PM..
Reason: last part got deleted.
I travel a BUNCH for work and spend a good deal of time in NYC. I am frankly quite sick of it. My friends pay 9K rent a month only to deal with mice, rats, and other vermin, it takes an hour to get anywhere, and I miss trees I can sit under alone. Its a great city-- I know. But its just falling short for me.
I know I am not an NYC girl-- an urban girl, yes, but never had a real connection with the magic that other people feel in NYC. I wonder if anyone else shares this sentiment. I apologize in advance to anyone I am insulting-- I don't mean to-- I just never *got* this place and the more I am exposed to it, the more tired it makes me.
So, anyone have NYC fatigue? if so, what are your causes and symptoms?
As much as I LOVE this great city, I'll admit, I'm tired of it. Plus, my life up till now has not been the best and I have too many bad memories here. I've even began considering moving to the West Coast after college. LA since it's light rail system is the only transport system worthy of me. And most importantly, a fresh start.
I am not concerned with image or status. I appreciate that you re-read the responses and my posts, but some how I am failing to convey that the constant running around, hours to travel a few blocks, massive expense and crazy rat-race that is my experience with NYC leaves me very unimpressed. I DON'T like that stuff. I have relocated recently to get AWAY from that sort of vibe/lifestyle.
I can't refuse to go to NYC for work, nor can I choose to stay somewhere more authentic than Midtown. And yes, I have pals with money. Certainly not all my pals do. My amazement was that anyone would spend so much to live with mice. Just sayin, this place has got to have *something* going for it. What it is, I don't get.
Its easy to make a judgment about some anonymous poster. And NYC is FULL of people who love it and let me know how much they love it. When I am in NYC, even the things I enjoy have the fun sucked out of them by inconvenience, cost, crowded conditions. Take sitting under a tree. Last time I did that in Central Park, dozens of tourists with loud kids parked themselves close by and started yelling at one another. I moved. Three more times. I could never be alone to read a book. I love the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens, but find that after a long day of dealing with egos from the folks I have to work with, I don't have the energy to visit. It wears me out.
Thanks to all of you who have let me know I am not alone.
I got the message-- if you don't like NYC, there is something wrong with *you*, not the city.
It's not you. I was born and raised her and feel the same way you do. It drains me completely. I live on Staten Island, but commute here for work and believe me on the weekends, this is the last place I am. If I didn't have to work here, I would never be here. I hope to move out of here far away in a few years, and am just enduring it until then. When I was in my early 20s, I had more energy for this place (but still didn't LOVE it) but these days (I am 36) I just hate it.
BTW-I am with you Central Park. I went there maybe two years ago hoping for some relaxation and serenity, but just got aggravated with the crowds and noise.
No, original poster, you don't get it. You, are still part of the problem. Many of your posts are defensive, if not baiting. Now grandstanding has been added to your self importance. It isn't always what you say, but how you say it.
One can live and or stay in Midtown Manhattan and live quietly outside of work. Many people do it.
You need to have something going for yourself.
I'm not here to sell you on Manhattan, nor to defend it at all costs, ...nor have many of the other posters.
I can promise you that you will dislike something of every place you go and live. That means it's a much more productive option to fix yourself first.
You are angry, at seemingly everyone. The egos of your co-workers, the crowds, tourists, parks, posters on internet message forums ad many more.
You now say you don't have the energy to seek out other places and options.
You seem preoccupied with how other people think and feel. your co-workers, internet message board posters, tourists, kids at a park, people who don't hate Manhattan or other parts of NYC, or the world.
You may not like my response but I can promise you it's for your benefit. The problem is in large part, you.
You can vent and go back to your routine. If it is a prolonged legit situation, then make a change. There is nothing less productive than complaint without change.
You most certainly can live and work somewhere else in a different job. Get a plan going, type of job, network, where you want to live etc...and work towards that.
No one cares either way if you like NYC or not. No place is for everyone, nor the be all end all.
You may not like certain aspects of a particular place, and sometimes, you'll gain agreement, disagreement, an indifference. But you don't seem to like much of anything, and that's a you problem, not just a place problem.
...............
I got the message-- if you don't like NYC, there is something wrong with *you*, not the city...
Wrong. It's neither.There is nothing wrong with you and there is nothing wrong with New York City.It's just that you don't belong here.
Seems like almost every aspect of this place annoys or drains you in some way.Obviously ,it is a toxic environment for you and you should keep away for your mental health.
You say that's not possible but really it is.There are plenty of cities and states in this country that I will never,ever return to for any reason.Some of them are quite popular but I hated them,the climate,the people's ways or all of these things, so why ever go back ?
Certainly would never waste my time to go onto a CD forum in those places and question why I hate the place while so many others love it.
I just don't belong in those places so I stay away.
Wrong. It's neither.There is nothing wrong with you and there is nothing wrong with New York City.It's just that you don't belong here.
Seems like almost every aspect of this place annoys or drains you in some way.Obviously ,it is a toxic environment for you and you should keep away for your mental health.
You say that's not possible but really it is.There are plenty of cities and states in this country that I will never,ever return to for any reason.Some of them are quite popular but I hated them,the climate,the people's ways or all of these things, so why ever go back ?
Certainly would never waste my time to go onto a CD forum in those places and question why I hate the place while so many others love it.
I just don't belong in those places so I stay away.
Very well said ~ I agree with all of that! ↑ ↑ ↑ ↑
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new york can be mad irritatin sometimes. so just relax n everything will be better. 
