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I find this as well. Lots of single older women and men, lots still living at home with their mom/dad. I really think there is a shortage of decent partners in this city.
I think because in NYC people want the best of the best so they are afraid to settle in case someone better comes along. In other places there are only so many people so you get whats good as soon as you can. Also most Ny-ers live here for their job/dream so getting married, having 2.5 kids, a dog, and house with a fence is not their priority.
Why is everyone in city so lonely. I have talked to so many people and they all say I am so lonely I need a good partner bf/gf etc
It's true a lot of people are lonely, despite living in dense populations. Work commitments and related socializing take up much of some peoples time-Not surprising they work very hard to get ahead esp given the cost of living. We have also grown further apart. Technology brought us out of the caves and valley's and now we are returning to digital versions of them. Many are on social media non-stop and I think it makes it harder to connect, i really do. the dating game starts after meeting people and that's not easy either. I stand by my statement I have been howling about for years-Dating is stressful, with bad encounters and the fact everyone is on thier best behavior so you don't see the real person until spending some more time with them. But you must do it to find someone.
Best bet-You must have some friends/family/co-workers, Organize a night out where people;e congregate. get out and try to get some numbers and mingle. Skip the online dating s**t. Go old-school first. Meeting a great person often comes where we least expect it. Happened to me.
Why is everyone in city so lonely. I have talked to so many people and they all say I am so lonely I need a good partner bf/gf etc
Because of the reason of what we are doing right now. POSTING instead of trying to make a connection FACE to FACE. This takes guts. You can't be a jellyfish. Nothing substitutes the real thing.
I don't think its necessarily just the internet, though that can be a part of it.
Its the overall society, and not just NY. There are people who do plenty of face to face in bars, hanging out wherever, etc. But these are considered bad people.
Good people are supposed to spend all their time in school and work. But if that's all you do, you won't have met that many people, so having friends will be tough, and lovers even tougher. Your lack of social skills or personal interactive skills would make extremely difficult to deal with romantic situations.
Also, I've learned if you're just talking about your career, blah, blah, blah, who cares. These days, the people who spend any length of time together are dramatic crazy ones. Just look at Rihanna and Chris Brown, together for awhile, broken up, and back together. While "good" people these days tend to have much shorter relationships, and its often over before it begins. And this isn't just celebrities.
Why is everyone in city so lonely. I have talked to so many people and they all say I am so lonely I need a good partner bf/gf etc
Yeah you probably need a gf or very least a lady friend who you can hang out with from time to time but also increases your sex appeal and desire from other women here, from my experience and observation women do tend to take notice and appreciate a guy when he is with a woman walking down the street. They are plenty of lonely people here in NYC, I should say single people in matter of fact. My advice to you is to probably find something you belonging too, be part of some sort of group, organization and or even subculture, look hipsters and ghetto people, those folks are always in relationships due to the fact they are part of a belonging, but once your a man on the outside people think you are weird. Another thing in this city everyone is looking to find something better, with so much people everyone assumes something is better out there, someone with more money, a career, more physically fit, bigger butt and boobs, better at sex, bigger penis, her family is well off, etc, sad but it is true, you will constantly find women here who are willing to trade up or men who are looking to upgrade and sometimes even downgrade and settle, and I have seen guys do this already. Try some sort of group or organization, dont do clubs or bars since its just guys looking to score and women who are only looking for guys with money or with attractive or both generally guys like this in NYC are already taken, also avoid speed dating events, online dating etc which is similar nightlife club bar dating scene, women looking guys with money or good looks and men looking to get laid at all means possible. Goodluck on your endeavors!
Last dont be a nice guy, emotional, and clingy, women wont out right admit it but they dont like stuff like that from guys.
Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 02-01-2013 at 03:35 PM..
It's true a lot of people are lonely, despite living in dense populations. Work commitments and related socializing take up much of some peoples time-Not surprising they work very hard to get ahead esp given the cost of living. We have also grown further apart. Technology brought us out of the caves and valley's and now we are returning to digital versions of them. Many are on social media non-stop and I think it makes it harder to connect, i really do. the dating game starts after meeting people and that's not easy either. I stand by my statement I have been howling about for years-Dating is stressful, with bad encounters and the fact everyone is on thier best behavior so you don't see the real person until spending some more time with them. But you must do it to find someone.
Best bet-You must have some friends/family/co-workers, Organize a night out where people;e congregate. get out and try to get some numbers and mingle. Skip the online dating s**t. Go old-school first. Meeting a great person often comes where we least expect it. Happened to me.
Or you can even go out by yourself. Join a gym, do other activities, go to the bars, community centers, volunteer, hang out with people you already know, etc.
And also, while you can talk about your work and activity, it also helps if you talk about your problems as well.
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