Life Lessons You've Learned in New York City (crime, houses)

[Indi9]

...the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly.

Hi. This is not the usual why-I-love-NYC thread. What I am hoping to learn here is what have you learned by living in the Big Apple. What strengths have you gained or developed? What weaknesses have you had to learn to overcome? What is it about New York City that inspires people to keep quoting Frank Sinatra, as in, "If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere? It's up to you..."

Perseverance, independence, living on a tight budget, tolerance, how to ride a crowded subway without asking for the phone number of the person who just sat in your lap , how to negotiate with your landlord by learning your rights and responsibilities as a tenant, how to remain focused in the midst of noise or traffic...

Care to share? Both the lesson and the story behind it?

I'm in one those rare Sunday morning/afternoon reflecting-on-life-in-the-big-city kind of moods. Yes, Billy Joel, "A New York State of Mind."

[Rachael84]

Well, I grew up an upper-middle class neighborhood on LI, just outside of NYC. I regularly visited the city being that my family lived there. Anyway, last year I got a teaching job in an elementary in the south Bronx. I got to see how other people lived outside of my safe, semi-wealthy neighborhood I grew up in. I grew up pretty naive; thinking that poorer people lived drug-infested lives in run down houses, and their kids probably weren't well-behaved at all since all the parents were so young themselves and didn't know how to parent. I guess a lot of kids just learn that from the movies, which obviously don't accurately portray life. But I didn't know this growing up. I was worried about my safety with teaching in the area. My parents were even more worried (they still picture NYC like it was in the 1980s when we lived there).

Fast forward a year to now and I just started my second year teaching there. I learned a lot my first year. Last year I had such supportive parents, and I noticed they aren't much different than the parents who lived in my childhood neighborhood. They may make less money and their problems may be different, but everyone is really the same in the end. I had some parents who I could tell parent their kids great, and then I had some parents who seemed non-existent in their child's life. It's all the same everywhere--you'll get that in an upper class area and a lower class area. If anything, those parents in the south Bronx are actually more down to earth than most people I've ever met. They aren't stuck up like area I grew up in. They also appreciate the small things in life; whereas many wealthy people only appreciate the expensive things they can afford. But of course not everyone is like I just said, but a good handful are.

Also, as far as safety, I was definitely naive thinking something was bound to happen to me working in this area. I never had one bad encounter. Sure I look different from 99% of the people walking around in the area, but no one seemed to care. They were actually very nice to the teachers in the area. When I went to lunch with my mentor, everyone in the diner was so nice to us. This area has more crime than most areas in the city, obviously, but that doesn't mean everyone in the area uses drugs and robs everyone.

Overall, this past year has been a real learning experience.

[Futcha]

I'm only 17 so I can't really think of any yet. I'm sure I'll learn when I decide to do something stupid to the wrong dude. As a HUGE sports fanatic, I have a bigger mouth than most people.

[Indi9]

Thank you, Rachael84. What a powerful story. I had a very similar learning experience when I decided to teach in a local community college. If I had listened to the person who tried to stop me I would have missed out on what has turned out to be one the most satisfying experiences of a lifetime. Yes, people are people are people.

Hey, FutureCop. You are so right. You have plenty of time to think about what you have learned or to take on some learning experiences. 17 is not so young. Many of my first year college students are about your age, and I really learn a lot from them when they dig deep and dare to share their insights in their essays and classroom discussions.