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If I were in your shoes I'd put a nice pic of myself in your profile here. People, both guys and girls, who respond favorably to your pic and profile will want to get in touch with you. Things might snowball from there, but this is a great spot to introduce yourself to the world of CD and all its members.
Try volunteering like others have suggested. This will help you in many ways, socially and professionally. You may have dropped out of HS, but you did get your G.E.D. That is fantastic!!! Being alone is a vicious circle. Do what you can to work your way out of it.
I love the poster that said you have to first be a friend to have a friend. It is hard for many people, just one step at a time.
I honestly don't see this as getting any better. Most of the time I just keep asking myself how I am going to live my life without something so crucial. Most people in our society operate in packs and levels, and if you miss the ticket you are now considered an outsider who has no choice but to stay on the fringes.
Just wanted to let everyone know that people like me are out there and are trying to exist for one more day....
This was kinda brilliant! The trick is to be iconoclastic and break those molds. OWN your differences and make your own tribe! I'm not saying it's easy but as soon as you come to peace with your deviations from the norm in your area the sooner you will link up with like minded people. Trust me, we are there, we are all around you, and we will befriend and mentor you to help you find you path.
I honestly don't see this as getting any better. Most of the time I just keep asking myself how I am going to live my life without something so crucial. Most people in our society operate in packs and levels, and if you miss the ticket you are now considered an outsider who has no choice but to stay on the fringes.
Just wanted to let everyone know that people like me are out there and are trying to exist for one more day....[/quote]
Don't feel bad being an outsider - many of the most famous and significant people in the world have
felt like outsiders
Quote:
I went to public school for like, one day. I don't get it. Everybody tries to be exactly the same. I think being an outsider is a good thing.
[LEFT]Ethan Embry
[/LEFT]
I feel like an outsider, and I always will feel like one. I've always felt that I wasn't a member of any particular group.
Anne Rice
I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.Bill Hicks
As a kid I just felt like an outsider. Marilyn Manson
I've been an outsider all my life - I don't care. Chloe Sevigny
I never felt I belonged. I was always an outsider. Ethyl Waters
I've been such an outsider my whole life. Thom Mayne
I would say that although my music may be or may have been part of the cultural background fabric of the gay community, I consider myself an outsider who belongs everywhere and nowhere... Being a human being is what truly counts. That's where you'll find me. Annie Lennox
Perhaps if you did some volunteer work, you would get socially involved with some of the other people there, and the experience after awhile, is something you can put down on a job application, and might
help you land a job.
My suggestions are similar to what others mentioned:
-Visit with a career counselor or attend a job search workshop so that you can get some help getting interviewed and hired. It sounds like you could use some help with filling out job applications (you might need some help selling yourself so that employers want to call you for an interview), and help with your resume and cover letter.
-Volunteer at a hospital, animal shelter, homeless shelter, food pantry, or whatever interests you.
-Apply to a school - a 4-year college or university, a community college or a trade school. Even if you don't want to enroll at a school, take some classes. The deadline might have passed to sign up for Fall Semester 2012 classes, but find out what Winter Session and Spring Semester classes are available and sign up for those now.
1) Work out and eat healthy. Having a healthy body really changed my mindset. It makes you more calm and assertive, and being calm and assertive means you can make decisions more easily. That will be reflected in your energy both in your resume and your discussion with others.
2) Agree on the meetup groups and actually going out and going to art events, music events, galleries, etc. Get involved in something beyond work. I actually met my wife organizing fundraising parties for the Democrats in my area.
3) You may not realize it now, but 22 is very young. And you likely did have friends going back, you just didn't notice it. I realized that other guys when I was growing up made fun of me or made horseplay, never violent, and in retrospect, they liked me and wanted me to lose the sheepish exterior and just come out and have fun.
4) Your resume needs a cleaning. Negative energy reflects in less assertive embellishments of your experience. Show your pride in something!
The job thing is a little complex, I've been putting in applications all over my city and surrounding towns for 4 years now, and nobody calls me back not even for an interview.
What kind of jobs are you looking for? What do you have experience in? What interests you?
I'll be 22 soon and I haven't had any kind of social life or friends for about 8 years now. I have never had any kind of dates or relationships with girls before either. I do have mild aspergers syndrome which doesn't affect me too much. I blame part of being alone on the fact that I dropped out of 10th grade and got a G.E.D. instead of graduating as well as moving around alot. My situation is a long story, but I get pretty down about it sometimes. Most people who see me think I am an average person but on the inside I am pretty decayed. I am like most people my age nowadays, unemployed and not able to find a job, bored, and broke. I have not been to college. Now I just spend most of my days wondering why the world is so screwed up. It just seems like my mind has forgotten what a friend is or what a friend or social life or whatever is supposed to do and supposed to be.
I honestly don't see this as getting any better. Most of the time I just keep asking myself how I am going to live my life without something so crucial. Most people in our society operate in packs and levels, and if you miss the ticket you are now considered an outsider who has no choice but to stay on the fringes.
Just wanted to let everyone know that people like me are out there and are trying to exist for one more day....
You forget that, no matter what your situation, you are still a part of the pack. You're human, right? Then you are a part of the pack. You just need to assert your right to belong a little stronger.
But I suspect, like me, deep down you understand being a part of the pack is no picnic. And that's why you're alone. Because you really don't enjoy being in groups. If you really did, you would be in a group. Groups are messy. Groups are volatile. Groups are imperfect. Groups can turn into nothing but a chore. Many groups are comprised of people just flattering each others ego in order to maintain a connection to each other. That's why there is a lot of ignorant group think in groups. They fear the new member who doesn't understand that their egos must be flattered to maintain group harmony. There is far less stress and work involved in being alone.
Last edited by Shankapotomus; 09-11-2012 at 05:59 AM..
This was kinda brilliant! The trick is to be iconoclastic and break those molds. OWN your differences and make your own tribe! I'm not saying it's easy but as soon as you come to peace with your deviations from the norm in your area the sooner you will link up with like minded people. Trust me, we are there, we are all around you, and we will befriend and mentor you to help you find you path.
"OWN your differences." I love that.
You can even take it further and say "OWN being alone." Enjoy your circumstances because there is always someone out there who would love to be in your shoes.
I would love to be totally alone in the world right now. Just stripped of all the ignorance, fail and anti-intellectual dead weight I am saddled with right now.
I know how you feel silenthelpreturns. In some way, I think everyone feels like an outsider and feels alone. I am going through a period right now where I am very alone too. It's been hard to connect with other people for various reasons - loss of job, illness, depression.
What I have been doing is immersing myself in movies - lots of comedy, some documentaries and some dramas. I've also been reading a lot. There are so many good writers out there. These things have become my friends in a way.
For you, please know that you are not alone. Just try one thing each day to make yourself happy. Whether it is finding a good book to read (highly recommend Hunger Games), or art (can you draw, paint, etc?) or like some of the people have suggested, volunteering. I volunteered for a while at the Food Bank. That opened my eyes to many things.
I truly do hope you find what you are looking for. Best wishes.
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