So it's inappropriate for teenagers (under 18) to have any adult friends?? (male, person)
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Apparently a lot of folks think so...plenty of you, I'm sure, had an older friend, maybe it was someone middle aged, maybe someone in their 20s. You might've met them at some extra-curricular activity or something, and they're just friends, someone a bit older who can also give you a bit of guidance in life and whatnot. As you can read in the linked thread, I'm online friends with a few people who happen to be under 18. We just talk on facebook, that's it, and not even all that much, but apparently that's totally inappropriate.
What do you think? Should teenagers, specifically those under 18, be friends with people in their 20s or older?
Apparently a lot of folks think so...plenty of you, I'm sure, had an older friend, maybe it was someone middle aged, maybe someone in their 20s. You might've met them at some extra-curricular activity or something, and they're just friends, someone a bit older who can also give you a bit of guidance in life and whatnot. As you can read in the linked thread, I'm online friends with a few people who happen to be under 18. We just talk on facebook, that's it, and not even all that much, but apparently that's totally inappropriate.
What do you think? Should teenagers, specifically those under 18, be friends with people in their 20s or older?
I have 2 children and if they for any reason befriend a stranger in their 20's when they are 15-17 it is not going to fly with me. Ever.
I miss the old days of the Internet (and BBSing), when no one knew (nor, typically, cared) how old you were. Or what you looked like. Just remember one thing still holds from those days, which is that there's predators with badges around and they will try to entrap you no matter how innocent anything is. Get even a hint of anything sexual from any of those under 18, and you should probably stop chatting with them immediately.
Can you give a percentage? Will you just assume an adult who befriends a child (if one considers a 16-17 yo a child) has ill intentions?
As a mother, even though my kids are 4 and 7 , I am responsible for the company they keep. Why would a men in his late 20's befriend my child? What are his intentions? I remember being in my late 20's and never befriending a child. Neither did my late husband.
Why would an adult man befriend a teenager?
Think about it this way, would you allow your kids to befriend an adult male? Or would you want to know wth is going on with that?
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Originally Posted by MauriceP
As a mother, even though my kids are 4 and 7 , I am responsible for the company they keep. Why would a men in his late 20's befriend my child? What are his intentions? I remember being in my late 20's and never befriending a child. Neither did my late husband.
Why would an adult man befriend a teenager?
Think about it this way, would you allow your kids to befriend an adult male? Or would you want to know wth is going on with that?
I'm talking teenagers. 17 and 27 isn't that weird for online friendships. Maybe it's a generational thing. 17 and 50 might be a bit weirder, but if they were just friends due to a specific interest or anything I wouldn't assume anything unless of course my child began acting oddly or this person gave reason to be suspicious.
I'm talking teenagers. 17 and 27 isn't that weird for online friendships. Maybe it's a generational thing. 17 and 50 might be a bit weirder, but if they were just friends due to a specific interest or anything I wouldn't assume anything unless of course my child began acting oddly or this person gave reason to be suspicious.
Do you have kids? I plan to monitor their activities until the day they turn 18 and are legally adults. As a parent, i would not allow it, just because i find it weird;
If you have kids i would advise you to be more careful with them and not wait until they start acting oddly; by then it might be too late. And if you really care for your underage "friends" encourage them to disclose your relationship to their parents and then see what happens. If these kids come from solid families, their parents might not like the fact that a man almost 30 is "talking" to their child.
Of course, some parents do not care, and that is why so many kids are abused. Not saying you are doing anything wrong but as a mother it does raise a red flag.
It depends. What are the circumstances? Why are they hanging out? What similar interests or hobbies do they have?
I hear a lot of people complain about how young people today are so immature - but their kids only hang out with other kids their age. I was an only child and an introvert so I spent more time than usual around my parents friends. I was also more mature and better behaved than most kids.
If it's kids making an older friend though athletics, or a social club or something, I don't see what's wrong with that. My parents monitored who I hung out with. If they thought someone was a bad influence, they ended it. Why can't parents do that? Instead of having a blanket ban at the arbitrary age of 18, why not judge it on a case by case basis?
Eva you are 100% correct. It is the parents responsibility to monitor what the kids do. But when the difference in age is so large as a parent I NEED to know what is up. There is no privacy in my house. If my kids use the pc, i am entitled to see what is going on, what is being said etc.
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