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No! No f-ing flowers! Cheese... what would be the point? What would that accomplish? You were both wrong. you buying her off again just tells her she's right, you're wrong.
Yes, I truly meant my apology. Strongly considering buying flowers soon to further prove how sorry I am( even though I've been advised no gifts but I think this is an exception). Also, just because I post on here, that doesn't mean I don't talk to her about it with her first.
There's a difference between a gift because you screwed up and a gift just because she wants something!
People, you're all forgetting he didn't "leave her alone to raise the child". She chose to not go with him when he left for school. It's time for her to be over that. And he needs to remind her of it.
I really should appreciate what she did for him. He would be the first one to tell you that he had a great childhood and upbringing.
Without her, he would have in foster care or adopted or living with family.
Neither one of you can change the past, but you BOTH have to get over it and move on with your lives. Have you ever sat down with her and asked her what she wants out of her life? Would she like to take a pottery class, go to community college, something?
People, you're all forgetting he didn't "leave her alone to raise the child". She chose to not go with him when he left for school. It's time for her to be over that. And he needs to remind her of it.
They BOTH need to let go of the past! He does NOT need to remind her of the past. They EACH have their own version. We've NEVER heard a word from her. There's always 3 sides to a story - hers, his, and the truth.
Honestly, when you're a college student, you don't have time for a girlfriend/wife and baby. Not if you want to do well at a school like Notre Dame. He didn't go to Billy Bob U and study shoe shining.
Yes, I truly meant my apology. Strongly considering buying flowers soon to further prove how sorry I am( even though I've been advised no gifts but I think this is an exception). Also, just because I post on here, that doesn't mean I don't talk to her about it with her first.
Don't buy flowers. It's great you both apologized over the argument....that is a step forward. But why reward her with THINGS when she's as much to blame as you? You'd be reinforcing her ability to guilt you into buying things every time she goads you (and yes, she goaded you, you responded badly though) into an argument.
If she starts a big enough argument will you buy her that condo? That is exactly what she's thinking.
It's much too soon to reward her for acting like a decent human being should.... the mutual apology is a good base. Leave it there.
I really should appreciate what she did for him. He would be the first one to tell you that he had a great childhood and upbringing.
And you had nothing to do with that? Yes, you should appreciate her for her part, but not to the point that she can beat you over the head with it 17 (or however many) years later. Most couples move on. Your wife doesn't seen capable of doing that without help.
There's a difference between a gift because you screwed up and a gift just because she wants something!
Not in this case. Flowers would be a reward for her not letting go of the fact they had a rough start...the same reason she uses to justify things every time she wants something. It's a new tactic of the same story.
So...what is she going to buy or do for Irishfan she's she started the fight?
I don't see flowers as " Here's a reward, thanks for the guilt trip" I see them as " Please accept these flowers as a further apology for my being a jerk last night"
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